BOATER SELF-SUFFICIENCY

By Barb Hansen
August, 2012

For all our faults we boaters are self-sufficient people. We plan. We practice. Before a trip we check everything from fuses to foghorns, charts to chocks. Tanks are topped off. Spares are secured. For a weekend cruise we stock the fridge for a fortnight.

 This is fun, actually. Planning the cruise is part of the cruise. See, virtue really is its own reward.

 Pre-cruise we tune the TV to The Weather Channel. Online, we check real-time satellite images. If a tropical storm or worse is a possibility, we call off the cruise.

Certainly, the human survival instinct motivates us. Boaters know how quickly the sea gets angry and becomes life threatening. We read about others who have died at sea or survived, barely. So, we prepare. We play what-if games. Better safe than sorry is more than a cliché.

And there is this. No boater wants the embarrassment of being rescued by another vessel or, heaven forbid, the Coast Guard. Chastened, the embarrassed skipper imagines what other boaters might be saying back at the dock, mean things like, “He just ran out of gas; is that pitiful or what?” Or, “You won’t believe this, but they were using an old chart.”

To a vessel operator, embarrassment of that sort may not be a fate worse than death, but it’s right up there.

 

Another current of thought – you could put it at the core of the boating belief system – is the ideal of freedom. We are free to sail where and when we want. But we also accept the corresponding responsibility. If others are willing to rescue us when we’re in trouble, we ought to try hard not to get into trouble in the first place.

It seems like every hurricane season we have a case where thousands who should and could have evacuated, did not.  They probably told themselves, Hey, we haven’t had a storm here since forever. It won’t hit us. They never do. That rationale reminds me of the Steven Wright line: “I plan to live forever. So far, so good.”

Even minor hurricanes and tropical storms can cause power outages and flooding (and multiple deaths) as the U.S. East Coast discovered in 2011. And hurricanes are not the only threat out there; think tornadoes, earthquakes, flooding, power failures. Keep thinking.

Well, if just a few individuals get into trouble the police or fire departments may come to their rescue. But when thousands get into trouble, first responders will not have the manpower or resources to rescue everybody. Boaters already know this, so we tend to rely on ourselves.

 A fine and fragile line separates our comfortable lives from hardship or even death. Self-sufficiency helps boaters stay on the bright side of that line.

THE REAL FREEDOM OF BOATING

By Barb Hansen
July, 2012

When Vic and I leave the dock a thought always comes to my mind, along with a feeling of exhilaration. I think, Wow, free at last. I’m free at last from the office and all the minute-by-minute commotion of the office.

Don’t get me wrong. Vic and I love our work, and we work hard and long. We don’t get out on the boat as much as you might imagine. So when we get to cruise, it feels like freedom to me.

We Americans have been living out our destiny of freedom ever since our forefathers signed the Declaration of Independence. And while, after all the centuries and decades we still debate what freedom means, we know it is a word and a concept we hold dear. We celebrate Memorial Day and the 4^th of July with flags waving and patriotism at a fever pitch. It just feels good. And that’s where boating comes in.

 We’ll leave the ideological debate over the meaning of freedom for another time. As boaters, we care about the physical freedom of getting in our vessels, untying the lines, and sailing or powering away from the dock. For us the American “spirit” is synonymous with the freedom of boating. Boating lets us escape from our daily routine and lifts us up to a place we long to be, close to that which we hold dear – family, friends, and the beauty of the world around us.

As boaters in America, and especially in Florida, we are the envy of many boaters around the globe. In our business, our charter customers and boating students come from countries around the world. We have the freedom to buy the boat we want to buy, or the boat we can afford to buy with the resources we have. We have the freedom to cruise where we want to cruise, to return home each night, or stay away for weeks or months at a time. In fact, unlike driving or flying, as adults we have the freedom to pilot a boat with no federal license requirement, whether we are qualified or not! Sure, there are rules to follow and matters of nautical etiquette to consider, but for the most part we boaters police ourselves.

I read an editorial recently in which the writer made this point: “America is great, not simply because we are free. America is great because with that freedom, we choose to do good.”  We have the freedom to choose what type of nautical society we want as well. And we choose to be good boaters, and good citizens, because that’s the kind of society we want on the water. That’s the meaning of freedom that boating teaches to novice boaters and old salts alike, every time we are on the water.

 As far as recreation goes, boating offers freedom of another kind. When was the last time you waited in line to go boating? Think about it. There are no serpentine lines, ticket-taking lines, hand-stamping lines, conveyor-belt boat moving lines, “is your vessel this tall” lines, boat “fast-food” lines (or is it “fast-boat” food lines? Whatever), or “please take a number” lines! We leave the dock, we cruise, we relax and re-charge, and then we return to port on our own schedule. That’s the freedom of boating. And we love it.

 So, let freedom ring. Welcome Aboard.

MANAGING MY 'TO DO' LIST

By Barb Hansen
June, 2012

I've been looking for ways to save time so I searched "save time" on the Internet. It was a big waste of you-know-what.

 Oh, there are a zillion links that tell us why we need to keep a to do list and how to rank our tasks. Heck, I do keep a to do list. The problem is that it's longer at the end of the day than it was at the start.

 For years my Dad would tell me, "Barb, Time marches on. Take time to smell the roses." I tried. Dad died some time ago, but I still hear his words in my head. Alas, I'm still working on the smell-the-roses dictum.

 Part of my problem is that I love my work managing our yacht charter and yacht school in N. Fort Myers. I love working around the house, even pulling weeds or dust-sweeping up those ubiquitous border collie dog hairs. Twenty-five years in our home and nearly 30 years in business. Life is good.

Still, there is that nagging to do list.

I wag my finger and preach to people to make time to go cruising. But, I confess to you, brothers and sisters, that I have failed to live by the gospel of relaxation myself. I confess that my work ethic alter ego has sometimes planted a not-kindly thought in my mind: How come they get to go on a cruise and I have to work?

Mea Culpa. I know, what I have to do is learn from my customers. They know how to manage their time rather than the other way around. They learned how to reward themselves for jobs well done rather than weight themselves down with blame for jobs undone.

Dad was right. Time marches on. It can't give us more of itself. It flows regularly and inescapably forward. There is no turning back the clock or the calendar. Time and tide wait for no man. Nor this woman.

So I am hereby making some mid-course corrections.

One is I am going to let my to do list get longer and from now on, in my mind, longer is better. I'll sleep at night knowing that it's all written down.

Another correction is rather than blame myself for jobs not done, I'll congratulate myself for doing important jobs well.

And the last is that I will now add fun things to the list just to, you know, smell the roses. Thanks, Dad.

YOU ARE WHAT YOU THINK

By Barb Hansen
May, 2012

I was on the phone with my best friend the other night and asked her what she thought about a big story in the news. She said, "I haven't heard anything about it." She went on to say that she gave up watching the news or reading the paper a month earlier. The news was just too depressing and disturbing, she said.

I was shocked. Me, I am a current events junkie. A Political Science major, I have always been drawn to the news in the political world. Old habits die hard, I guess. When I am in my regular routine I tune to the news first thing in the morning and it's the last thing to go off at night. Generally, I feel good being informed and engaged. In my mind, this is what a good citizen does.

To each her own, certainly. My friend lives in the nation's capital and the discouraging yin yang of the government sausagewerks is probably in the D. C. air. Anyway, she told me she's much more relaxed now that she knows less of what is going on in the world.

 So what is it about the news that makes one person feel bad and another feel good? I think it must be something going on in our heads. My husband has always said, “If your head is on right, a tin cup can be a silver chalice. It’s all about how you look at life.” You are what you think.

 Let's say you pass somebody on the street and he starts yelling obscenities at you for no apparent reason. You might be inclined to think, "What a jerk." But if you found out the other person was severely mentally ill you might think, instead, "Oh, poor guy." See, you are what you think.

Now, of course, there is some serious doom and gloom in the news. Sometimes the news is so discouraging it's hard not be down and maybe even a little angry. But, woe is we? Nope. Not here.

I am so lucky. I manage a charter yacht company and school for yacht skippers -- at a marina -- and the ever-present sound of happy marina people doing what they do is like taking a happy pill even when I'm at my desk and dealing with business matters.

You know what, people who work around boats are happier. Boaters are happier. I'm convinced of it. It doesn't make any difference whether they're on a megayacht or a paddleboard. I'm reminded of an old saying which I think has some oceanic truth to it: Mountain people are wise. Ocean people are happy.

So, if the news is getting you down, go down to the water's edge and catch some sunshine. If you really need a stronger dose my prescription is to gather up the family, get in a boat, and push away from all of that land-based negativity. It's funny how your perspective changes on a boat. No TV. No newspapers. No news is good news.

Don't have a boat? Actually, you do. There's a charter boat in this marina with your name on it. Think about it. You are what you think.

THINK SMALL

By Barb Hansen
April, 2012

Some of you probably remember the Think Small advertising campaign. This was the headline of a successful TV advertising program introducing the little Volkswagen Beetle to America. That was in 1959, more than half a century ago.

Since then it seems the world has gone from thinking small to thinking big -- too big if you ask me -- about everything from supersized fast food platters with 3,500 calories to 15-deck cruise ships for 3,500 guests.

I applaud the cruise ship industry for introducing cruising to so many but I have to say that as cruise ships get larger they have more to do with big plates of food and onboard entertainment than enjoying the wild blue wonder and visiting ports of call.

The new Freedom of the Seas is the largest luxury cruise ship in the world. It's 1,120 feet long, 184 feet wide, 208 feet tall. They should call it Freedom from the Seas because of all of the gee-whiz stuff onboard, like a little river, a waterfall and sculptures shooting jets of water. It even has geysers shooting from "the ground."

 It has a mall for shopping, eating, entertainment – They call it the "Royal Promenade" – and at night they put on "street" parades with music and laser lights.

Geysers shooting from the ground? Street parades? It seems like they're trying hard to make you think you're not on a boat but terra firma, and terra firma offering the same thing you have at home. Then why take a cruise? Save money. You can visit your local mall for shopping, eating and entertainment.

As you also may know, cruise ship accidents have been in the news lately. Costa Concordia ran aground and capsized off the coast of Italy. Costa Allegra had an engine fire and drifted in the Indian Ocean. Costa Europa rammed a pier in Egypt. Periodically, nasty stomach viruses spread among dozens of passengers and the vessel has to return to port prematurely. All this has prompted some to rethink their next cruise.

Well, how about something with two cabins instead of 2,000, something for four friends instead of 4,000 strangers? Instead of 24 buffet lines how about a vessel with a stove and fridge and you get to be the chef?

May I suggest that you not cruise a rocky coast but rather a glassy-smooth waterway framed by barrier islands and mangrove wilderness? Alas, at night they don't put on street parades, but you and your friends can sit on the bridge and watch the sun go down. There is no after-dark laser show but you might see a comet streak across the sky.

This vessel doesn't have an activities director. Well, it does, actually. You are the activities director. Just tell the captain you want to collect shells on the Sanibel Island beach, eat a cheeseburger in paradise on Cabbage Key and cap off the day with a Crème Brulee at the Collier Inn restaurant on Useppa Island.

Yes, I'm suggesting your next cruise be aboard a small charter yacht, not a cruise ship. I'm suggesting your next cruise be on a vessel that departs when you want to depart, goes where you want to go, and stops and starts at your command.

If you're considering another cruise, I have a timely suggestion.

Think Small.

WELCOME ABOARD, NEWBIES. REALLY!

By Barb Hansen
March, 2012

Most of our yacht chartering customers have cruised before. Many own or have owned yachts. When I go over the do's and don'ts, they get it.

But I really like explaining it to newbies. If I do it right, I tell myself, they'll enjoy the cruise even more and feel like they'll want to cruise again. They'll get what cruising is all about.

Sometimes I use the spoon-full-of-honey-helps-the-medicine-go-down philosophy.

For instance, if I tell them "Don't feed the wild animals" that gives me an opportunity to talk about the wild dolphins that might show up and ride their wake.

Of course, most of the do's and don'ts have to do with more mundane things than dolphins. It's not as easy to sell things like using lamps sparingly. The generator is great, I say, but it's even greater when it is turned off and you can hear mullet jumping and great blue herons squawking. Instead of cranking up the generator at night and turning on the TV, tell pirate stories and fish whoppers.

Space is at a premium on a boat. So soft-sided luggage like duffel bags give you more room in your small cabin than hard-sided luggage. Ironing board? Nope. On board, you're supposed to be proud of your wrinkled fabrics. You're on vacation, remember.

Sometimes humor helps the sales pitch. I ask them no to throw paper and other incidental trash into the toilet unless they've chewed it first. They get it.

People typically want to be well thought of. So when I remind them that fresh water is at a premium, I also tell them that taking long showers is a no-no until they dock at a marina with showers. I tell them shoe soles that leave dark marks on white fiberglass decks will leave a mark on your boating reputation. Boat shoes solve that problem, and give you traction, too.

Children? You are a good parent, aren't you? Give them direction, I say. (Better from you than a harsh word from the captain, eh?) Leave the video games at home and limit time on laptops and iPods, too. Instead, have kids keep a written and/or photo record. It'll come in handy if they are assigned to write a school essay about what they did on their summer vacation.

 Boating has a long tradition of established protocols that, I'm sure, sound off-putting if you're new to boating. One such tenet is that the captain is boss. But, the point is, safety. So, for instance, if the captain asks you to wait in the cabin while he docks the boat, don't take it personally. He just wants to make sure nobody gets in the way of the docking procedure or is tempted to step onto the dock before the boat is secure and he gives the word. And when I put it that way, I see nodding heads.

The real joy of my job is when the new cruisers return and tell me this is the best vacation they ever had. Then I know they got it. And they get it.  ##

CANDIDATES DEBATE BOATING

By Barb Hansen
February, 2012

MODERATOR:  Candidates, a viewer in Fort Myers, Florida has emailed a question about boating. Let's put it up on the screen.

There are many recreational boaters out there who are undecided about which of you to vote for because they don't know your position on recreational boating. Are you a boater? What kind of boating do you like to do and why?

 Mr. Speaker?

Speaker SlowPoke:  "Fundamentally, the American people known that if we can set up a 51st state on the moon then we can restore recreational boating to its philosophically correct place in the world as a basic tribute to our great nation in honor of the founding fathers and Ronald Reagan. I am a boater – thank you for asking – and Carisma and I like to spend long weekends on a trawler – nothing fancy – that just hums along at a modest speed and lets us get away from the ex-wives and other demands of civilization. This is the kind of boating I would support from the oval office. In fact, I would make the flybridge my own oval office. And, furthermore, as president I will sign an executive order stating that Governor Sailalong's campaign has been more blatantly dishonest than any presidential race in the history of U.S. elections.

Governor Sailalong:  "Well, Mr. Speaker, I have to say that your positions on boating and going to the moon are sheer lunacy. You should get away from K Street once in a while and see what life is like in the rest of America. Visit small towns like Marblehead, where I keep my sloop, then you would know the heart of America is in setting sail on your own and dreaming big like I did and reaching the finish line in first place using your own wits and wind. Sailing is the essence of what it is to be an American. In addition, my sailboat is the ideal vessel to escape the Occupy Movement. Frankly, Mr. Speaker, you can take your stinkpot and shove it and I'm sure the American people agree with me.

Senator Gofast: Now hold on there Governor Sailalong and Speaker Slowpoke. Folks, did you just hear what they said? They said they prefer an America that just plods along like their go-nowhere-fast boats as if we have plenty of time to solve these issues. And when they have to debate President Flotsam Jetsam, they will lose. They will be figuratively left behind at the marina. Folks, we need to put this economy on the bow of my Sea Ray and give it full throttle. I am the only candidate with the vessel that can get from here to there quickly, a go fast boat, and we will leave Speaker Slowpoke and Governor Sailalong and their so-called vessels rocking and rolling in my wake.

MODERATOR: Congressman, do you want to weigh in on this?

 Congressman Driftwood: I don't have an opinion about that. But you asked me to weigh in on this issue. Actually, maybe the country would be a whole lot better if everybody had a boat to get away from the politicians. You know sailing into the sunset is starting to sound good. Maybe I should get out of the race before they all start swiftboating me.

MODERATOR: Candidates, while you were responding to the boating question we received another email, this one from Southwest Florida Yachts, inviting each of you to visit as president of the United States and charter the boat of your choice, sail or power, fast or slow, and cruise the beautiful waters of the Sanibel-Captiva area.

ARE YOU "SAD?"

By Barb Hansen
January, 2012

Are you feeling down? Lethargic? Perhaps your bathroom scale points slightly toward the high side?

You may be suffering from SAD, Seasonal Affective Disorder. SAD commonly affects millions of people in northern climates in the late fall and winter. Days are shorter. The sun doesn't shine much, if at all. Your body doesn't produce the melatonin it needs to feel right.

Last year Farmer's Almanac identified the five worst winter weather cities: Cleveland, Detroit, Duluth, Syracuse and Casper, Wyoming. Years ago I heard about a town in the upper Midwest that went six weeks into a new year before the sun made a brief appearance.

 

Here in southwest Florida, where work's winter uniform consists of shorts and a boating shirt, this is the time of the year when I have to remind myself not to phone friends up north and brag about our pleasant weather, especially not when they're getting cold fronts and not much sunshine. They're already sad enough.

Fortunately, medical science has prescribed a regimen for SAD. It includes light, fresh air and cognitive therapy. Collectively this is known as Cruising in Florida. In Florida, light therapy is automatic. After all, Florida is the sunshine state. Florida is practically synonymous with fresh air. Boating supplies the cognitive therapy.

At the end of a satisfying day of cruising in paradise and exploring Sanibel and its neighboring islands you'll be sitting up on the fly bridge watching the sun set beautifully over a scene that might include roseate spoonbills, herons, egrets and wood storks feeding on a flat at low tide.

Are you still depressed? I don't think so.

Now I should mention that from time to time our prescription is not strong enough for severe cases of the blahs. In these cases, we prescribe another natural pill labeled Attitude Adjustment. Our kit of supplies for students at Florida Sailing & Cruising School includes a bumper sticker -- Attitude is the difference between an ordeal and an adventure. Vic and I adopted it after we heard more than a few students say things like, “What if it rains?” Actually, it rarely rains in Florida in the winter but we just tell them, “Oh, we don’t charge extra for that.”

Not much was known about SAD back in 1984 when Vic and I started Southwest Florida Yachts. But, born and raised Midwesterners, we instinctively knew that helping people cruise in Florida was the ideal therapy for the sun-deprived.

For more than 100 years winter vacations in Florida's sunshine have been the natural pill that people from the north have ingested for SAD. Alas, I fear that a lot of northern state boaters still haven't learned this valuable lesson. They do not have to be trapped by the weather or sloppy thinking. While their harbors are iced up and their boats are wrapped in tarps, they can still tend to their boating addiction and their medical issue in a meaningful way.

Hey. Don't be sad. Get out of there. Fly to Fort Myers. We'll get your boat ready.

THE BEST GIFT OF ALL

By Barb Hansen
December, 2011

Santa is making his list and checking it twice. Since you've been very nice I suggest you ask him for the best gift of all – family and friends. That's also known as boating.

Yes. There’s something about boating that insists that it be done in the company of others. It’s all about teamwork and accomplishing something together. It's about a common purpose, about strengthening relationships, about forging shared memories that last a lifetime.

A few years ago a single man took one of our live-aboard courses at Florida Sailing and Cruising School. Just student and instructor. They spent a day covering all the basics right up to anchoring for the night. The student did well. The day was done. But then he asked the instructor what he should do after anchoring and securing the boat. Our instructor asked him pointedly why did he want to cruise if he didn't have somebody to enjoy it with. The instructor told me the man thought about this for a long minute. Then he looked up and said, “I think I should think about being in a relationship.”

Well, yeah.

Relationship building is the main reason why I believe boating is the best possible gift. The gift is not the boat. Rather, the gift is commitment we make to each other. After that, you can look for a boat to buy or, like many, just decide to charter vessels for personal cruises.

Experts say there is a high correlation between boating and happiness, and I think the reason is they are doing it with people they care about. Heck, every time I go boating I know I'll get a positive charge times three: One, when Vic and I plan the cruise. Two, when we cruise. Three, when we remember the cruise.

As a matter of fact, some years ago the National Marine Manufacturer's Association sponsored some research that showed that boaters are happier than non-boaters. Maybe boaters are naturally happy even before they start boating but, whichever, boating always puts a big exclamation point on it.

So, you've got a boat and your favorite people are on board. Now what?

Make time for it. Everybody complains that they don’t have enough time. Well, when you’re hooked on it, boating motivates you to make time for it. It's that important. I heard about a physician in solo practice who wanted to go boating but he never had any time off. He figured out a solution. He went into practice with other doctors but he made a deal with them. The deal was each would take extended time off periodically for whatever they wanted to do and the other doctors would look after missing doctor’s patients while he was gone.

When you've moved the big parts of the picture into place I think you and yours will discover that the other pieces to life's happiness puzzle fall into place easily.

Some examples: there's a feeling of accomplishment. There's a lot to know and a lot to do when you're boating and a good job-well-done feeling at the end of the day and the end of the cruise. You'll get your rest. On a boat, you'll sleep like a baby. Naps are okay, too.

Oh yes, there's stress reduction. On the boat you'll be miles away, mentally and physically, from life's workaday burdens. You'll be loving the scenery. You'll be checking the nautical chart. At the end of the day you'll be placing the anchor so the boat drifts back to the perfect place on the planet for the sunset.

The best part is that even after the cruise is over and you're back doing what you do, the memories you made will always be with you. When I find my mind drifting into negative territory, I can jerk it back to the happy side of the scale by summoning up some delightful cruise in the past.

It's a cliché, I know, but the reason that boating is the best gift of all is that it never stops giving back. If you’re already boating, make time for more. If you’re not may I just remind you that Santa is making a list.

OCCUPY A BOAT

By Barb Hansen
November, 2011

Some day Occupy Wall Street protestors will Occupy a Boat. I mean that in a good way. I think some actually will buy boats or charter them and they will love every minute on the water.

They will be like the hair down to here hippies of the 1960s who quit drugs, washed their hair and found a job and earned their own financial success.

Fast-forward forty years from today. I can see some former Occupiers anchored up and enjoying the views and breezes with their spouses on a fly bridge. They will remember, not fondly, the lice and lethargy of 2011 when home was a public park that smelled like an outhouse, where drums pounded, vuvuzela horns squawked, and people chanted stupidity: "We WE …are ARE …the THE …99 Percent."

Remember, for every action there is a reaction.

Maybe one of the new one percenters will be the young man Conan O'Brien joked about. He proposed to his girlfriend, "Will you occupy my parents' basement with me until I get a job?"

Well, it's a start, if his parents are okay with that. Why not? Up to now they've given him everything he ever asked for including paying for his PhD in Postmodern Know Nothing Studies where he learned that others owed him a comfortable living and health care, too. It's a human right, don't you know.

Yeah, you know this story. Eventually the parents kick them out of the basement and the young couple applies for jobs. They don't put Zuccotti Park on their resumes.

Most of their former comrades leave Zuccotti Park when the first cold arrives. A few dirty and disheveled deadbeats keep on banging drums, blowing smoke, and stinking up the neighborhood.

After a year or so of this businesses and residents of the neighborhood pack up and leave the city. So New York City's Mayor for Life Bloomberg agrees that if the protestors would please leave the park he will let them Occupy empty office buildings in Lower Manhattan.

Meanwhile, our young couple from the park earn enough to pay rent and buy a used car and they feel better about themselves. They get promotions and raises from time to time so on special occasions they agree to Occupy a restaurant and actually pay for dinner and tip the server.

Yep, our couple has a couple of kids and when the little ones are toddlers the family auto takes them all to the Florida coast and they all Occupy a beach. They build sand castles together, periodically applying sunscreen to pink faces and reminding the little ones not to leave their Kit Kat wrappers in the sand.

They Occupy a dolphin-cruise tourist boat and see bottlenose dolphins surfing the boat's waves and their kids are just thrilled. "You know," she says to the man she married, once a boy with a PhD, "wouldn't it be great if we had our own boat and could go on dolphin cruises all the time?"

See. This is how it happens.

They get the boat. It's great but soon they realize it's too small so they get a bigger boat. And the kids invite their school friends to get pulled on the big ski tube with them and they are far and away the most popular kids in their classes.

Everybody works and studies hard. Then one year, before their teenagers leave for college to prepare for corporate jobs, they decide the time is right to charter a spacious yacht and cruise the beautiful Southwest Florida coast for a whole week.

Wow. This is a boat they could actually, you know, Occupy. It has indoor plumbing, clean linens, comfy beds, heat and air conditioning, everything they need but not drums or vuvuzela horns. The only chant is the put-you-to-sleep charm of the boat's engines.

Temperatures are just right. The Gulf ICW is glassy smooth. Dolphins perform. Ospreys plunge-dive for small fish then eat their meals, guardedly, at the very top of bare trees. Flocks of pelicans fly by in formation. Herons and egrets peck in the shallows for worms and minnows.

Once, cruising along, our couple detect the slightly off-putting whiff of something from Bird Island. They look at each other, both reminded of the same thing, and keep cruising into the fresh air.

That night, anchored up, the family kicks back and takes in the views and breeze on the bridge. The parents tell their teens about Zuccotti Park and they offer some parental words of wisdom, something about always striving to be in the top one percent.

REFUSE TO BE "SIVILIZED."

By Barb Hansen
September, 2011

Are we more free on the water than on land? I say, yes. But I would also have to say that it's probably more of a feeling than a human right. Still, it's a great feeling.

Being on the water has always felt good to me, even as a child, and it feels ever better since September 11, 2001. The destruction of the World Trade Center's twin towers and the murder of more than 3,000 innocents reminded us that we need the government to provide for our national defense – that's in the constitution – but if you sometimes feel like life is just one big TSA pat-down, then I recommend boating.

And, in addition to airport and other government hassles, we have what is called the "nanny state." I just read where New York's health department wanted to outlaw day camp games like wiffle ball, kick ball and Red Rover? Too risky, you see. Fortunately, wiser heads prevailed.

The government-knows-best people are always looking for ways to curtail personal freedoms. Food police want to outlaw Happy Meals and require calorie counts. At one Chicago school the students can no longer pack a lunch and bring it to school

If that is the way civilization is going, heaven help us. It's time to escape to the water just like Huckleberry Finn and Jim. They escaped on a Mississippi River raft, Jim from slavery and Huck from society's attempts to "sivilize" him.

I call water "the wild blue wonder" and for me it is the very symbol of freedom. Looking at an expanse of water is nice but, let's be honest, you're not going to get that special feeling just by looking at it. You need to be on the water.

People list lots of reasons why they like to go boating. They like to fish, or paddle, or go fast, or go slow. They like being close to nature. They like fresh air and sunshine. They like the sound of the paddle, the sound of the sails, the sound of the motor. They like being with friends and family away from the reminders of life's ever-present chores. Memories are made of this.

Today, a lot of busy people are deciding chartering a yacht is the way to go. Then you and your family and friends can really get away from it all because your boat has, hubba, hubba, beds and a kitchen.

Some people even opt to see the USA in a boat. For example, you actually can cruise protected water – barrier island channels, canals, bays, and rivers -- from Fort Myers Florida to New York City, Montreal, Chicago, New Orleans and back again to Fort Myers. That's called the Great Loop Cruise. It's a long way and it takes a long time but you know what? A TSA agent will never pat you down or ask you to pose for a camera that removes your clothes.

 I think boating is in our DNA. It's why when we were toddlers we floated a toy boat in the tub. It's why boy scouts graduate to sea scouts. It's why my husband-to-be Vic built a teenager's sailboat and made sails from old bed sheets. Today, it's why we operate a charter boat company in paradise.

Be a good citizen, but don't let them "sivilize" you. It's a great feeling.

CALL ME SKYE THE BOATING DOG

By Barb Hansen
October, 2011

My name is Skye. I'm the new Border Collie around here. My assignment is to be the office dog and security dog for the Southwest Florida Yachts charter fleet. I also serve as the personal house pet and boat dog for my new parents, Barb and Vic Hansen.

Barb, my new mom, asked me to write this month's column so I could tell you my story.

I'm not a puppy. I'm already five and a half. The Hansens adopted me just a few months ago after their beloved Star passed away at the age of 16. They were very sad. One day Aunt Theresa at the animal clinic called them and told them she had a dog – that was me – who needed a home and some attention. They decided to give me a try.

Of course, I had to be on my best behavior because I knew right away that this would be a special place. First of all, I would not have to work 24/7 and sleep outside in the yard like with my first assignment. Before I was given up for adoption, my first parents kept me outdoors all the time. Today I have my own bed inside an air-conditioned house.

Right off the bat I learned it would not be a good idea to bother the house kittens or chew on the sofa. No big deal. Mom gives me really good food and lots of yummy treats. I'm pretty sure I've passed the probationary period.

I've come to understand that I've got four big feet to fill. Star the wonder dog was Barb and Vic's heart and joy. She was a Border Collie, too, which endowed her with exceptional skills.

Mom told me that Star was the official greeter at Southwest Florida Yachts. Her job was to welcome all, smile, and to lie down and be quiet when they had visitors. I hear ya, Mom.

They took me to Marinatown where the fleet boats are headquartered. Mom told me Star was very good at patrolling the docks at the marina, providing security of a sort and shooing away birds from the boats. Heck, I can do that. When I was at the pound I overheard somebody say that that the local airport was spending $5,000 to train a border collie like me to chase birds off the runway. For free dog food and medical care I can shoo birds from boats. It's in my DNA.

Please understand I have nothing against birds. It's only that they need to know that there is a place for everything and a boat isn't one of them. I went on a short weekend cruise with Mom and Dad recently and, oh boy, did I learn that lesson.

I haven't been on any extended cruises but I'm really looking forward to them. They told me Star liked to pace around the boat and when a dolphin surfaced she'd give a shout out to the passengers to let them know the show had started. Mom told me the more Star ran around the deck barking at the dolphins, the more they would perform. I could do that.

I'm good to go. I could even write a guest column now and then.

Just call me Skye the Boating Dog.

TAKE CARE OF YOUR BOAT (Or get somebody else to do it.)

By Barb Hansen
August, 2011

Vic and I were working on the boat recently. My job was to reach deep into a dark access hole and blindly hold lock washers and nuts in place while Vic twisted in three screws from the other side.

Physically, it was agreed, I was more suited to reaching around and holding them in place. Vic said my arms were thinner and I was more flexible. This is true.

Successful boating requires diligent boat maintenance. If you are going to do this yourself you should be no more than four feet tall. Your arms need to be six feet long and elbows should be double-jointed so you can reach and hold fasteners, filters and fittings.

It helps if you are a circus acrobat who can twist yourself into a pretzel shape. Or, you could marry one.

Boat maintenance and auto maintenance are different. Most of us don't get to use our boats as often as we use our cars so we don't get as much warning when something is about to break. Also, unlike car shops, boat repair shops are few and far between.

Some boaters actually enjoy working on their boats. Most don't. Time is short. We'd rather be out on the water. But, maintenance is necessary. The old saw is, Take care of your boat and it will take care of you. I interpret that to mean take care of it or it will break down when you're out on the water.

Better safe than sorry, of course. One of our responsibilities at Southwest Florida Yachts is to maintain our charter fleet. Since we don't want our charter customers to break down on the water, we follow a simple rule: Repair and replace things on a schedule. If we wait for them to break they will break at a time and place not of our choosing.

Vic and I are licensed boat brokers and we help buyers find boats. Right on the front end we tell them to consider the long-term cost of maintenance. For example, twin engines are nice for docking and maneuvering but engine maintenance expense is twice that of a single-engine vessel.

We have managed yachts with every whistle and bell imaginable – high tech electronics, multiple battery banks, electric dinghy lifts, complex entertainment systems. A couple even had trash compactors. We call that "stuff." It's okay to have lots of stuff on the boat but remember, more maintenance will be required. Eventually, everything needs repair or replacing.

Our tilt is always toward the boat that is equipped with what is necessary, but otherwise simple. When outfitting a new boat or retrofitting an older one, choose quality. You'll be happier. Quality lasts longer and lowers maintenance costs and aggravation, especially on a boat that (unlike your living room) is exposed to the elements.

If survival of the fittest theory is correct some day all boaters will be short, long armed, double-joined, and have an extra set of eyes on their fingertips so they can see exactly where to hold lock washers in place.

Until then we will have to use our inflexible bodies or get somebody else to do it.

It's one thing to be stuck at the dock and quite another to be adrift on the open sea. Take care of your boat. Maintain it on a schedule. It will give you more time on the water and peace of mind, too. And that's a bargain.

IT'S SUMMERTIME AND THE CRUISING IS EASY

By Barb Hansen
July, 2011

I was browsing you-know-what and read something a parent posted online. I Googled manatees. It was about Florida manatees, of course, but this entry reminded me about the wonderful age of 10.

And, may I suggest, it also was about why cruising in Florida ought to be on the summer vacation to-do list for every young family.

It was posted on an online forum and the parent wrote, "We just got home from our wonderful trip to Sanibel for the first time. We saw a mother manatee nursing two babies near the lighthouse close to the shore on Friday Aug. 7… She also had about five other babies waiting their turn just poking their little noses out of the water. What an awesome sight for my 10 yr old daughter and me."

This was an awesome sight and awesome times 100, I think, because it was shared by a parent and 10-year-old. Ten-year-olds – I'm sure you know this – are the perfect age for an experience like this but, hey, I'm sure this would be a wonderful thing to see for all children above the age of reason up to and including those in their cynical mid-teen years, too.

The thing is, seeing manatees and frolicking dolphins in the wild is not at all unusual in Florida in the summer, especially when you're on a boat. They call this the "low season" but manatees and dolphins don't know that. For Florida’s wildlife, summer is the high season.

By the way Sanibel, mentioned by the parent of the 10-year-old, is one of our famous Gulf barrier islands in Southwest Florida and it helps shape the popular, protected cruising corridors on either side of Pine Island.

Here at Southwest Florida Yachts the summer pace is a tad more relaxed after a "high" season of chartering vessels to snowbirds escaping the cold up north. In the summer the calls often come from moms and dads asking what summer cruising is like because this is summer vacation and their kids are out of school. They've done Disney, and they are so over Disney.

Oh it's very good, I say. Then I'm off on a summertime is the best time riff. Cruising is the just right thing for a family with children to do on summer vacation.

I tell them about seeing manatees and dolphins in the wild. I tell them about seeing a thousand wading birds feeding on a shallow flat and a thousand stars twinkling from the dark sky at night. It's summertime. Living is easy. Fish are jumping.

I like showing off our lovely part of Florida to visitors during the low season and I’ve always thought it way too sad that so many fail to come here at a time of the year when Florida really shines.

This is "Real Florida," as the tourism people call it. It really is. And the cruising is easy.