Florida Boating

BOATERS: YES WE CAN

2009-02-17T16:28:00.000-08:00

Boaters: Yes We Can
By Barb Hansen
February 2009

Sour economic news comes in daily on the computer, and it pains me especially to learn of doors shutting and jobs lost in the boating industry. The boating "industry," in case you didn't know, does not consist of huge publicly-traded companies. Mostly it is many thousands of family-run companies.
The good news is that while the news may be bad for our industry now, I believe we will get the good news of a turnaround in boating before many other sectors. Why? Because boating companies are resilient. But, really, it's because boaters are resilient.
Think about it. We boaters are used to weather delays, saltwater showers, and even "meals" concocted from emergency rations in the almost-empty galley locker. We know how to "make do" when there's a hiccup in our plans.
And this economic hiccup – and that's what it is in the big scheme of things -- plays right into our strengths as boaters.
We are independent. Industrious. Efficient. That goes for our companies, too. They don’t need a bailout. They don't want a bailout. They are not sinking. What they need is something that we can give them. Our business.

We just need boaters to help boating firms, just like boaters help boaters in need at sea with a tow or a spare part, just like cruisers help cruisers by sharing food, water, fuel and free advice.

Boaters have always been a close-knit community and boating has always been an activity that brings families and friends closer together.

We boaters have come together during difficult times in the past. We can come together now.

Take a boating vacation. Go to dinner at your favorite dockside watering hole.
Don’t put off those boat repairs any longer. Call on your local boat mechanic or shipwright.
Visit your local marine retailer. Check out the latest in marine electronics, deck shoes or galley gear. Make a donation to your community’s junior sailing program.
Do it for yourself. But appreciate the fact that you are also helping the companies we boaters will need next year and the year after that.
This is a teaching moment, the perfect back-drop to teaching our kids about our world, our environment, self-sufficiency and personal responsibility. It's also an opportunity to remind ourselves that no man is an island, especially in our industry.

Because you know, deep down, that government can't do it. But, you can. We can.

SAVORING CRUISES

2009-02-17T16:26:00.000-08:00

SAVORING CRUISES
By Barb Hansen
January 2009

Cooking is a lot like cruising, I’ve decided, and that’s a very good thing.

Between Thanksgiving and New Years I spent most of my non-office hours in the kitchen preparing yummy things for guests. Or, I was reading recipes of good things to make in the kitchen. Or, I was at the grocery getting the ingredients to make all those yummy things.

I have one rule about cooking – keep it simple. If a recipe contains ingredients I can’t pronounce or spices I’ve never heard of that dish will most likely not make it to my dinner table. The best recipe is one in my mother’s handwriting, a holiday treat that she would make at this time of the year for her young daughters and sometimes she’d let us help her.

The next best recipes for me come from the tried-and-true cookbooks, the ones with dog-eared pages or pages stiffened by an accidental smattering of egg whites.

Even when I was in the kitchen my mind wandered back to the office. Booking and planning cruises for our charter customers is what I do for a living as proprietor of Southwest Florida Yachts. And as I chopped and diced, mixed and poured, baked and broiled, it occurred to me the best recipes are like the best cruises.

When planning a cruise, instead of paging through cookbooks, I page through logs and charts, often with cryptic, handwritten notes that remind me of cruises past.

Keeping it simple is my tried-and-true recipe for a good cruise, too. One of the most important ingredients is a practical float plan, one that doesn’t take you too far for the time and energies of the passengers.

Consider the mix of individuals on board. Do they all have the same tastes in food and activities? In conversation topics? Jokes? Do they like to go to bed at about the same time and get up at the same time? Measure carefully here.

You don’t have to plan each and every stop along the way, but you should have a good idea where you want to go and how long it will take to get there. If you plan to dock or dine at marinas along the way, consider that you may need to make reservations in advance.

Even if the forecast is for perfect weather, plan for a dash of bad weather. You may or may not experience rain or rough seas, but if you are prepared for a possible weather delay or a change of course it will make for a more pleasant cruising experience. That’s where those books and games on board can come in handy. Be sure to stock extra provisions in case you don’t make that dockside dinner reservation.

For me, one of life’s satisfactions is cooking with my old dependables, pots and pans, knives and serving spoons that have been in my kitchen, like, forever. They are not the most expensive but they are good quality and have proved their worth ten times over.

Similarly, a good cruise doesn’t require a megayacht or the fanciest vessel. It just needs a boat that has been well-maintained and a few spare parts, just in case.

Like a good recipe, a good cruise should be topped off with something sweet to underscore the memory of a special cruising experience with the special people in your life. The very best sweeteners are unplanned like the joy of seeing dolphin surf your wake or a flaming meteorite brightening up the night sky.

Keep a cruising diary. Like your old recipes in familiar handwriting, it will be something you can savor for years to come.

SELECTING THE "PERFECT" BOAT

2009-02-17T16:25:00.000-08:00

SELECTING THE 'PERFECT' BOAT
By Barb Hansen
December 2008

There are no perfect boats. Accept this. Get over it. Move on.

Not even your first boat, the one that floated in the bathtub, was perfect. However, it did get you hooked on boating and it got you thinking about your next boat. It would be, of course, the perfect boat.

After all these years and one or more vessels later, you are still engaged in that quest, aren't you? (Well, if not, you're not a boat owner. But if you intend to be, pay attention. You can go to school on the mistakes made by some people you will probably meet.)

Alas, there are no perfect boats and there are no perfect people, either. Combine the flawed ingredients of both parties in this strange matchmaking brew, and the prize moves elusively away. Perfection is not attainable on the water planet. But, the impossible dream persists.

Actually, I don't blame the boats as much as I blame boat owners. The problem, like the song says, is that we fall in love too easily; we fall in love too fast.

As I write this, we are smack in the middle of “Boat Show Season.” The fall shows have just concluded and winter and spring shows are on the horizon. Boat shows bring out not only lots of beautiful boats, but also lots of beautiful people. Now when the beautiful people see the beautiful boats, well something magical happens. There is excitement, flirting and, one suspects, much more -- love at first sight, short engagements, and quickly-arranged ceremonies.

How long will these marriages last before papers are filed?

Many do not know this but, at Southwest Florida Yachts, the captains and I have become marriage counselors, of a sort, for our charter clients. Many of our customers own boats but they like to charter, too. They come to us and they confide in us, saying unkind things about their boats back home.

At our yacht brokerage division, we also counsel prospective buyers. We talk to our clients about their budget, their boating skills, their maintenance expertise, and their long-range cruising plans. Sometimes we find that their “dream boat” doesn’t necessarily match the reality of their bank account, their skills, the yacht’s required maintenance or suitability for their future float plan.

The problems seem to fall into several categories.

We married in haste.
Too many boat owners purchased their boat before they knew what kind of boating they really want to do. Maybe they bought a day cruiser but they realized later they really wanted to do more overnight cruising. A variation of this are the owners who bought a big, complex boat before their skills (or their checkbooks) were up to the task. Boaters could avoid a lot of expense and trouble if they analyzed themselves before they analyze the boat. What do they say, marry in haste; repent in leisure?

We can't buy a new boat because we can't sell the old boat.
Marriage partners aren't supposed to plan their divorce before they get married, but we believe this is a good strategy for boat owners. Boats stay the same, but people always change. Once upon a time you liked to run with a fast crowd, now all you want to do is take a slow boat to nowhere. So, before you buy the fast boat, investigate the possibility that you'll want to sell it some day. When you do, will you quickly find a willing buyer for it? A couple of tips: Buy a well-known brand. Pay attention to local boating wisdom. Plan an exit strategy.

We are just too different.
This is the sad situation that occurs when the physical needs of your new vessel exceed your desire to attend to them. The boat cries out for constant attention: Clean me. Oil my teak. Please pay attention to me. You don't want to work; you want to cruise. Advice to the lovelorn: Don't count on friends to help. Hire somebody to pay attention to the boat. Or, sell it and charter instead.

We should have bought a ranch house.
They bought a double-decker or a triple-decker boat but the owners didn't realize how their legs would take a beating from climbing up and down those steps. Their vessel has many good years left, and so do the owners, but they need a boat with fewer ups and downs. Sell the two-story. Get a floating ranch house instead. A variation of this is the problem of the tall owner who refuses to duck when he goes through passageways designed for short people.

I just wanted to get a good night's sleep. She wanted to party.
This is where so many nautical marriages go bad. Right from the start, the parties are incompatible. You thought this vessel wanted to cruise slowly and comfortably. Instead, all she could do was get up on plane and go fast. Two suggestions: Take a long test ride before you buy. Talk to people who know you and know the boat.

If all else fails, don't give up on your love for boating. There's another boat out there, the perfect boat for you and yours.

Well, almost perfect.
---

BOATING: FOR A BRIGHTER VIEW OF LIFE

2009-02-17T16:23:00.000-08:00

Boating: For a Brighter View of Life
By Barb Hansen
November 2008

You know something is not right when you say "Good morning" and the other person dourly answers, "I wish."

Why the negativity, I wonder. Well, if somebody has lost a job or a family member, I get it, but this person hasn't lost his job. He hasn't lost a family member. He has just bought into the malady that is sweeping the nation – gloom and doomitis.

Yes, the news of late has been rather depressing. The business slowdown, the rising cost of living, the loss of jobs… When you do the math it’s not a pretty picture. I don’t think there is any sector of our economy that has not been down except, perhaps, sales of antidepressants and alcoholic beverages.

I was recently reminded of the story of two young boys who were each put into a room where doctors could observe what made them happy. Billy was put in a room full of toys, games and candy while Jimmy was put into a room filled with horse manure. It wasn’t long before Billy had played with all the toys and games and had eaten all the candy. He started crying for more. Meanwhile, Jimmy was playing with the manure, making it into balls and tossing it all around the room. The doctors were astonished. Finally, they asked Billy why he was so happy in this room by himself. He said it was because he knew with that much manure in the room there had to be a pony around there somewhere!

Right now it’s hard to think about anything positive when we are surrounded by so much that is negative. When everything we read is bad news and everything we watch is bad news, it’s easy to just feel bad.

When I tell people that I’m in the yacht charter and yacht school business, the response is often wide-eyed like, “Wow,” or “How cool!” And it is, even when I'm dutifully at my desk and computer. But just about every week I try to get on the water on the boat. Even a short ride across the harbor in the sunshine and fresh air is good medicine for me.

I am not a real doctor but I sometimes play one in this column and this is my considered medical advice for our nation’s malaise. Go down to the water's edge and catch some sunshine. And if you really need a stronger dose, then my prescription is to get in a boat and push away from all of that land-based negativity.

Oh, sorry, I just can't, says Mr. Busy. There's no time, says Mrs. Hurry. I have things to do, places to go and people to see. There’s no time left for me.

Stop that.

Thanksgiving is just around the corner. Take this long weekend of opportunity to find the fair winds and calm seas of your mind amidst an ocean of worries and woes. Get out on the water if you can.

Perhaps a Thanksgiving weekend charter boat cruise? We often get calls from people who want to spend time on the water with family and friends for a special occasion such as an anniversary or a milestone birthday. There’s something celebratory about boating. Even in a season of doom and gloom, we have much to celebrate.

Marinas, I have observed, are like Billy and Jimmy’s play rooms. Some people need a big expensive yacht to make them happy and some boaters are happy with just a kayak or canoe. It’s not the vessel that determines their happiness; it’s what they experience with it that gives them pleasure.

My husband has always said, “If your head is on right, a tin cup can be a silver chalice. It’s all about how you look at life.”

Boating keeps our heads on right and lets us see the brighter side of our awesome world.

WILL BOATERS PLAY OR PAY?

2009-02-17T16:22:00.000-08:00

Will Boaters Play or Pay?
By Barb Hansen
October 2008

When the going gets tough, the tough…go boating.

If we didn't already know that big banks were folding, we're reminded daily by bold headlines, shouting TV pundits and screen images from Washington showing our representatives wringing their collective hands.

Boaters always take bad news badly. Confronted by bad economic news, our instinct tells us to start wearing a frown and stop spending time on the boat. That's exactly wrong.

Yes, these are tough times but -- think about it -- now more than ever we need our boats to help us keep on an even keel emotionally and physically.

We've been down this road before. September 2001 comes to mind. Things looked pretty bleak. Remember how worried we were then about the future of our sport?

Well, as you know, things got better. They usually do.

In a column I wrote then I said if you were a citizen of the 1950s you lived in an economy still recovering from the great depression and a world war. Some made enough money to buy a wooden boat just right for a rented five horsepower kicker. Not bad in those days.

But the economy got even better. Fiberglass boats appeared. Outboard motors got bigger and fast enough even to water ski. Families traded in little boats for bigger boats. Cruising boats got bigger and more comfortable.

Then in the late 1970s gas prices soared because the oil-producing cartel cut back on production. It was so bad that President Carter said maybe boating should be banned on weekends. That's how politicians think.

In the 1980s our elected representatives, thinking that all boaters were rich and richer, put a 10 percent luxury tax on "yachts." A luxury tax, they called it. Boat plants closed. Thousands lost their jobs. What were the politicians thinking?

They finally repealed that stupid tax. And things got better.

These tough times will pass, too, and boating will have another long run in the sunshine.

We're already seeing a silver lining. The slowing economy has brought down gasoline and diesel prices.

Indeed, when people put a sharp pencil to the calculation they discover that boating is not nearly as expensive as they imagined and often it is less expensive than other recreational activities.

Vic and I are getting into the lets-go-cruising mood and making lists of friends we'd like to join us. In the past, we've taken many friends cruising and some got so hooked on it they bought boats, too.

As the media keep reminding us, times are tough and may be getting tougher. Okay. But that doesn't mean we should stop being with the people we love and stop doing the things that make our lives whole.

It's also better for boating businesses and for competition, which keeps prices low. Support your favorite marinas. Dine at your favorite waterfront restaurants.

We need the companies that make boats or charter them. Support them because, you know, the government will not. Only banks get that special treatment.

We boaters are going to pay. Let's not forget to play.

SUDDEN SENSORY DEPRIVATION

2009-02-17T16:21:00.000-08:00

Sudden Sensory Deprivation
By Barb Hansen
September 2008

Are you feeling a little down now that the Olympic games are over and the TV networks have moved on to other programming?

You are not alone. Some of my charter customers have been telling me they are feeling depressed and, yes, are noticing their minds going in weird directions, too.

Judy R. reported that she loved to watch swimming champ Michael Phelps so she bought her husband an Olympics-style racing suit for him to wear when they went for a dip.

Heather W. said that ever since the TV coverage ended she scores every boat that passes by on nine-point-something scale. That trawler is a 9.6. This sailboat is a 9.3. That personal watercraft is a 2.1. And so on.

George W told me he has always unbuttoned his shirt to show off the gold chains around his neck when he's out for a spin in his go fast boat. Since the Olympics, though, he is thinking about melting his gold chains and making them into one, large, round pendant. He told me he might trade in his Donzi for a rowing hull and his button down shirt for neck-tight Under Armour. Is that weird or what?

See. You are not alone in your mental confusion, your suffering. Anecdotal evidence is mounting. We are dealing with a real medical condition.

Psychiatrists call it Sudden Olympics Sensory Anxiety Deprivation, or, SOSAD

Peer-reviewed literature suggests that SOSAD occurs when the brain is suddenly denied enhanced digital sensory images. The scientists explain it this way: Your brain has been focused exclusively on watching the world's best athletes in vivid high definition. Then, bam, just like that, it is taken away from you. However, to fill that void, your brain must somehow continue to stay engaged in the world even if the only thing to watch on TV is Larry King talking to Tyra Banks.

No wonder you're feeling depressed and despairing. Don't. There is hope for you to lose those heavy emotional chains and recapture the Eight-Gold-Medal Feeling you had watching the champion swimmers or, for others, the perky female gymnasts aged -- we hope -- 16 years or more.

Medical professionals have established a therapeutic program for SOSAD sufferers. They call it Solarium Aquarium Boatarium Regimentum.

It's not a pill and it doesn't require a prescription. It's just fancy medical profession talk for urging sufferers to change their physical location from indoors to outdoors, from land to water, from artificial light to sun light. And, yes, from a house or office to a boat.

Any boat, sail or power, will do. My clients confirm that equal measures of sun, water and boat cruising in a cool breeze feeds their senses and psyches with the natural medicines they need to feel right again.

Go out on a boat today. If you're still experiencing the symptoms of SOSAD, call me in the morning. No, on second thought, call me next week. I'm going cruising tomorrow.

MAKE TIME TO TAKE TIME

2009-02-17T16:18:00.000-08:00

Making Time to Take Time
By Barb Hansen
August 2008

Time and tide wait for no man. Nor this woman. I'm not worried about the tides but, ladies and gentlemen I could sure use more time.

I know time can't give us more of itself. It flows regularly and inescapably forward. There is no turning back the clock or the calendar. I wag my finger and preach to people to make time to go cruising. But, I confess here, brothers and sisters I fail to live by the gospel of relaxation myself.

My Internet connection was out for several days recently.

I felt awful. I couldn't receive emails. Worse yet, I couldn’t answer the emails I couldn’t receive. Would my customers consider me rude or think that I viewed their messages as unimportant? I called on the cyber gods, and my IT guy to set me free.

I could have seen this unexpected lost connection as a welcome opportunity to rearrange my schedule so Vic and I could go on a short cruise. Or maybe we could take the day off just to go fishing. No, Barb, no, said the voice in my head. You must check things off of your to-do list and neither fishing nor cruising is on your to-do list today.

I’m not particularly fond of my to-do list; however, I manage to beg, borrow and steal time away from other things in order to accomplish those inexhaustible tasks. I have to get the car serviced, go to the dentist, send a card to so and so, register a boat, buy some office supplies, take the cat to the vet, take the dog to the groomer, pick up this, drop off that, and then get to the office. Hurry, Barb.

I live in a world of multi-tasking mania. Even a walk to the mailbox requires a stop to fill up the cat food, bag up the trash, and pull a weed or two. When we lived on our boat we didn’t even have a mailbox – or a cat or a yard for that matter. Ahhh, life was simple.

Don’t get me wrong. Both our home and our business are near and dear to my heart. Twenty years in our home and 25 years in business – where does the time go?

My Dad will turn 90 in September. “Time marches on,” he says. “Take time to smell the roses,” he preaches. He knows about time. I should listen.

Yet, there is much to do. My to-do list grows as quickly as my grass with the summer rains. For now, though it can wait. Slow down, Barb. There is time to cruise, fish, read and garden. I just have to make the time.

Wow, what is that flowery fragrance in the air?

CRUISE AWAY FROM YOUR CONCERNS

2009-02-17T16:16:00.000-08:00

Cruise Away from Concerns
By Barb Hansen
July 2008

I tell our chartering cruisers to leave laptops and cell phones behind. But last month, when Vic and I and friends left Florida for our Alaskan inside passage cruise, what did I do? Yep. I hauled my laptop, cell phone and concerns along with me.

The bad news was my laptop and cell phone couldn't find a signal most of the time. The good news was my laptop and cell phone couldn't find a signal most of the time.

I have figured out there's a reward to hauling these devices around. They make us feel important. Our inner voices tell us, "The people in the office need me. They really need me." But there is a big downside to it – stress.

But aren't vacations, you know, supposed to be stress relievers?

I was a little antsy at first, not being connected, but I started to accept the situation. So as our 65-foot Malahide trawler ambled comfortably all the long days past the glorious scenery of Southeast Alaska, little by little I focused my attention on the relaxing reality of the here and now, not the unreal worry of what might be happening back at the office.

Even though we're in the yacht chartering business, and even though Southwest Florida is one of the most beautiful cruising areas in the world, I'd forgotten how relaxing it was to just go cruising. Work and other daily concerns just get in the way of taking time to enjoy it. Work, family, pets and house projects seem to take priority over a weekend cruise.

That's why I think vacations, to really work, require us to get out of town and to leave the you-know-whats turned off.

In addition to the majestic mountains and gorgeous glaciers that make up this part of the U.S. coastline, the wildlife was up close and very photogenic. Whales, sea lions, otters, seals, eagles and bears seemed to greet us at each new cove or provide at-anchorage entertainment after dinner.

Ah . . . the blood pressure goes down.

We fished, set out shrimp and crab traps, and dined on our fresh catch nearly every day. While onboard, I read four books about Alaska. I napped and slept like a child.

We have cruised Alaska on board this vessel in the past. It’s a classic, comfortable and sturdy 65-footer built of wood with a warm and inviting interior. A full-time captain and chef take care of navigation and nutrition. So very well.

I did have one electronic device onboard, my camera, but it helped my mind stay focused on the present. We covered more than 400 spectacular, panoramic miles at just the right shutter speed. If you want to see some, let me know. I'll email them to you.

We'll be going again next year. If you ever get that feeling that you need to "get away from it all" then you are welcome to join us. But: Turn off the cell phone. Leave the laptop behind.

By the way, those cushioned lounges they put out on the upper deck are wonderful for naps.

AUTOMATED VOICE MAIL SYSTEM HELL

2009-02-17T16:15:00.000-08:00

Automated Voice Mail System Hell
By Barb Hansen
June 2008

The mind wanders when it's put on hold.

Who are they transferring me to? Should I have pressed three instead of one? Maybe I should have pressed six and listened to the options again.

Ten minutes and still holding. I'd better put this on speaker. I've got work to do. Too bad this is a government office. If I were calling to buy something, I'd hang up. Maybe I'll hang up anyway.

A sophisticated voice mail system may save money but it turns off customers. It turns off me. I have stopped doing business with more than one company because of the lack of personal customer service. I am not the first or only person to do this.

A real live friendly person answers our phone. That call, you know, could be from a customer.

I know that's not the modern way. If you call the customer service desk the modern way is a friendly but automated woman's voice – My, I have learned to hate that voice – asking if 239-656-1339 is the number I'm calling about. YES. YES. YES. I'm sorry, the voice replies, "I couldn't quite make that out."

ARRRGGGHHH.

Recently, while on hold, I started wondering what a voice mail system would sound like if we got one of those fancy answering systems for our offices.

Here's the first draft.

Press 1 if you want to charter a boat.

Press 2 if you want to take a sailing or power boating class.

Press 3 if you want to buy a sail or a power yacht.

Press 4 to confirm a reservation you have already made, but not to change the reservation or cancel it.

Press 5 if you want to change or cancel a reservation.

Press 6 if you want directions.

Press 7 if you want to know what to bring on the boat. Yes, you can bring your dog.

Press 8 if you want to learn about the cruising area. It's beautiful!

Press 9 if you want to sign up a child for our summer day camp.

Press 10 if you have a compliment for us.

Press 11 if you have a complaint. You will then be put on hold until you get tired and hang up.

Press 12 if you are a solicitor. You will then be put on hold until you get tired and hang up.

Press 13 if want to check on the weather. It’s beautiful. It’s always beautiful..

Press 14 if you just want to talk about boats because it’s cold up north and you have nothing else to do.

Press 15 if you are looking for a part for your boat that has been sitting in your backyard for 10 years. We don’t stock parts. No, we don't have that part. Yes, I'm sure.

Press 16 if your father who was the former President of Nigeria has died and you have 10 million dollars you want to deposit in our account. Wait times now exceed two hours.

Press 17 if you want to talk to the owner and you want to sell them interest in oil wells in Oklahoma.

Press 18 if you want to hear this menu of options again.

For all other calls, please press zero. I’m sorry, all lines are busy now. Your business is very important to us. Good-bye.

Is this working? Never mind. I know the answer.

We're going to keep the personal phone answering system we've had for 25 years, thank you. When you call any day of the week, from 0800 to 1700 hours, a real live person will answer. I know this is not the modern way of doing business, but my gut tells me it's better business.

WATER IS THE WILD BLUE YONDER

2009-02-17T16:11:00.001-08:00

Water is the Wild Blue Wonder
By Barb Hansen
May 2008
Air travel advisory # 1: Don't.

If at all possible, take a boat instead. It may not get you there as fast, but it will surely be a much more comfortable and enjoyable trip.

Unfortunately there’s no fast boat to Washington, DC. So, on a recent trip I was forced to assume the knees-to-chest position for a couple of hours aloft each way.

Air travel advisory #2: While aloft (or in the security line) don't complain out loud.

Passengers can't hear you. They are plugged into earphones. Flight assistants are harried and just want to serve the soft drinks, pretzels and stale sandwiches. Remember when they served real food on real plate with real forks and knives?

It doesn't do any good to complain. You can decompress later and maybe vent a little, too, on a boat. Sound travels faster in the water anyway.

We travel in a world of “don’ts.” Don’t leave your car unattended. Don’t walk away from your bags. Don’t bring your own bottle of water. Don’t touch your carry-on when they are inspecting it.

Once upon a time there were no security lines, no threats and you could keep your shoes on prior to boarding. Once upon a time people used to bathe and put on decent clothes to fly. Today you're lucky if the person next to you is wearing shoes.

When one's husband is a private pilot, one would be well-advised not to complain about private planes. I'm sorry, but I fail to see the attraction in sitting white-knuckled in a small plane with nothing but space above and below.

There is something much more relaxing about cruising down the waterway with long sandy, secure beaches on either side. There are no take-offs, landings, seatbelts, and constant chatter in your ear. There’s no “Big Brother” on our boat. There’s no FAA, “Federal Aquatic Authority” for boating.

We can choose to maintain our vessels as we choose. Some boat owners may choose a lower standard of maintenance than others, but that is their choice. We can cruise where we want to and when we want to. There’s no “boating space” to ask permission to enter and exit. I can think of no other freedom we have that is quite like boating.

Airline travel is simply not fun. "Have a nice flight" is code for "I hope you get to where you're going."

Air travel advisory # 3. Don't fly. Cruise.

I'm not so sure about cruise ships or even megayachts but I do know that yacht cruising on a family-and-friends kind of yacht is the best way for the human spirit – this human spirit, anyway -- to become one with the water planet.

Serenity, thy name is relaxing in the breeze on the fly bridge of a trawler or sailing on a broad reach with a gentle breeze touching your face and a happy sun smiling on the scene.

There are no lines to get on board, no bags to check and no packing and unpacking once underway. There’s no waiting for a seatbelt light to go off so you can go to the bathroom.

There are no microwaveable meals aboard our boat. Fresh seafood and a chilled glass of wine await us on the aft deck. We take time to watch the sunrise and the sunset. Flying may be, as Air Force pilots sing, "the wild, blue yonder" but cruisers know that the ocean is the real wild, blue wonder.

A philosopher once said that mountain people are wise but ocean people are happy. Pleasant cruising.

BOATS VERSUS SNOW SKIS

2009-02-17T16:09:00.000-08:00

Boats Versus Snow Skis
By Barb Hansen
April 2008

Vic and I have returned to Fort Myers from our annual Rocky Mountains skiing holiday. As usual, I welcomed our return to warmth, green grass, blue water and white boats nestled happily in their slips.

My sore back and knees also welcomed the opportunity to recover.

As usual after our ski trip and as I return to the duties of running our boat charter and liveaboard yacht school, I find my mind comparing skiing and cruising.

I see in skiers the same qualities that I admire so much in yacht cruisers. Skiers and cruisers challenge themselves physically and mentally. Both love the freedom of wide-open spaces. They appreciate the rewards to the mind and general well-being that come from a well-planned, well-lived vacation.

The scenery is spectacular and you feel on top of the world at 10,000 feet. Sea level scenery has its own psychological rewards like the feeling of oneness with nature you get when a pod of dolphins surfs your bow wave.

I really enjoy skiing but, for me, each new ski vacation seems to tilt the scales a bit toward cruising.

Consider the physical issue. Skiing takes its toll on a body. I used to blame muscle and joint soreness on the demands of runs like Death’s Door, Terminator and Hell’s Gate. But now we opt for ski runs called Wanderer, Lazy Days and Easy Does It. And, still, soreness sets in. What's next, the bunny slopes?

I don't know the average drop-out age of senior skiers but I have to think that back soreness, bad knees, faulty hearts and high blood pressure commonly become tipping points for telling your spouse, "Not this year, dear."

Neither boats nor skis can stop on a dime so both skippers and snow skiers are taught to give each other a wide berth for safety's sake. I think boating does a better job of teaching personal responsibility. This may be an apples and oranges comparison, but one more often sees accidents caused by another skier being out of control and I suspect that most skiers experience a close call daily. Some popular runs even assign the ski patrol to direct downhill traffic.

Cost is always a consideration.

If you and your family charter a boat, you'll pay a fee for the boat and a bill for stocking up at a grocery. You'll pay for an overnight marina slip or two but, to save money, you can anchor up for the night in a no-charge cove.

Fuel costs are generally reasonable. Sailors pay a pittance and motor-trawlers are especially miserly at the pump.

You outfit yourselves with clothes to stay warm and fashionable on and off the slopes. You rent or purchase skis, buy daily lift tickets and refuel yourselves at pricey on-mountain restaurants. You pay for condo/motel accommodations. Your cruising vessel, of course, includes your sleeping quarters and a galley. There's no charge for tickets to the daily dolphin show.

The going rate for skiing lessons is $100 per hour. If you require a boat captain to handle the vessel while you play, you can hire one at $200 a day.

It's just a guess but I would imagine that taking a family of five on a week-long ski vacation would lower the bank account by at least $10,000. Compare that to spending seven days aboard a "floating condo." Your fully-equipped trawler or motor yacht will cost half that.

Cruising gets the nod for operating temperatures. Here in Southwest Florida you'll not hear the word "layers" to describe boating outfits. On a boat we can cruise all week wearing the same pair of shorts and a few tee shirts. At the end of the week, the washing machine and its operator have an easier time of it.

By this time next year my aches and pains will have done away and I'm sure I'll be rejoining my fellow downhillers on the slopes.

In the meanwhile I welcome calls from all of you dyed-in-the-wool snow skiers interested in chartering a slow boat through our Florida paradise. That way you can do your own skiing-versus-cruising test.

You'll enjoy the change of pace and scenery, warmer temperatures and lower prices. Let me just add that it will be just the right cure for sore back and knees.

CONVERTING BOATING SPOUSES INTO BOATERS

2009-02-17T16:04:00.000-08:00

Spousal Conversion
By Barb Hansen
March 2008

Boating industry poobahs (not me) had a meeting at the Miami Boat Show in February and I understand the hot topic was women.

It's not what you think.

My source told me the industry association described many things it was doing to promote the sale of more boats. They announced a new section on the website dedicated to spousal conversion.

Male and female laughter rippled through the room. One person was overheard telling a friend it would be nice to convert to an 18-year-old.

But the real point they were making is that boat sales have never been as good as they could be because many times the wife tells her husband "no."

I'm sure some women – and who can blame them – have been put off by that long and unfortunate habit in the boating tradition to assign the role of captain to the man and the role of first mate to the woman. That is a thing of the past. Good riddance.

But the main thing the marine marketing experts were saying is that many boat sales never occur because many women, married and single, lack confidence in their own boating abilities and also are apprehensive about boating safety issues.

I believe there's something to this.

I recently read the first person account of a woman who learned the hard way of the importance of training. This was written by Robin Freeman, Chief of the Department of Education of the Coast Guard Auxiliary:

“It was during one of our first few trips offshore that Rick asked me to stand by the wheel while he went aft to tie some fishing jigs. Suddenly I heard a gurgling, choking sound. I whipped around to find Rick doubled over, his face bright red! I feared it was a heart attack. Three horrible thoughts struck simultaneously: I don’t know where I am. . . I don’t know how to call for help. . . Please don’t die!”

It was not a heart attack. Her husband was choking on a piece of fishing line. He coughed it up and he was okay. But that didn't minimize this woman's feeling of helplessness while her husband gasped for air. And, in retrospect, she wished that she had learned how to operate the boat and use the marine radio before her scary incident.

That would have been before they started taking out the boat.

Boat sellers have been very good at selling the fun of boating. Now there is recognition that sometimes boat sellers need to adjust their sales focus to address safety and operation, especially among women, even to the point of offering boat courses.

Learning from a textbook won't cut it, in my opinion. Real learning and confidence only comes with hands-on instruction, in a boat. You can study it, but you also need to do it. That's what we do at Florida Sailing & Cruising School, our liveaboard yacht school.

Our instructors positively, absolutely do not assign the male to the helm and the woman to handle the dock lines. Each student, male and female, spends the time he or she needs to be proficient at all responsibilities – operating the vessel, navigating, docking, anchoring, communicating on the marine radio, even lighting the stove.

I hold this truth to be self-evident: The safest vessel will be the vessel on which everybody knows how to do everything. Sometimes the wife will be at the controls and the husband will be applying sunscreen to young faces and arms. And sometimes it will be the other way around.

Management consultants call this redundancy. I rather like spousal conversion.

CANDIDATES AT THE HELM

2009-02-17T15:59:00.000-08:00

Candidates at the Helm
By Barb Hansen
February 2008

If you could choose a boat for each of the U.S. presidential candidates which type of boat would you choose for him or her?

I’ve always tilted toward presidents who, in my mind’s eye, are in a boat. George Washington crossing the frigid Delaware with his soldiers in the dead of night makes him a star forever in my imagination. Teddy Roosevelt paddling a canoe down racing rivers is a boating hero, too.

FDR planning D Day on the USS Sequoia is locked in my memory. JFK racing his PT109 is also. I remember seeing a picture in the newspaper of George Herbert Walker Bush holding up a striped bass caught from his Cigarette. I prefer to picture him as a naval aviator.

So what kinds of boats do you see our current candidates piloting, and does it look like they know what they are doing at the helm?

I know that at least two really are boaters. Mitt Romney and his sons were applauded a few years ago for jumping on their personal watercraft vessels and racing to the rescue of a family whose boat had swamped. I read that John Edwards, who was about to become John Kerry’s running mate, ran aground at night in his boat with a Kerry advisor aboard.

But other than that, what we see is what we get, and we gotta guess.

I know Sen. John McCain was in the U.S. Navy but he flew a fighter jet. Now in my mind he pilots a classic single engine trawler, his labor of love. Its name is Neversaydie.

Here comes a go-fast Scarab, black with red flames painted along the hull. There goes Rudy Giuliani. Was that a big gold chain around his neck or a gold necktie? This boat is called Flame Out.

Mike Huckabee has invited friends for a Sunday ride in his pontoon boat. They are tooling around Greer's Ferry Lake on a hot, Arkansas day, cooling off with lemonade.

I see Romney at the helm of a classic yacht with lots of varnished teak and polished brass. He buys his crew matching polo shirts embroidered with the name of the boat. The name on the stern is Capital Management. Cradles and davits hold a bevy of PWCs plus an inboard ski boat. All ready to launch and run on a whim.

I gather that John Edwards was able to tilt the lower unit up and power his boat off of that Carolina low country mud flat. The picture is kind of fuzzy but I think it’s a walkaround cuddy. The name on the side is not clear. Something like Class Warfare.

Barack Obama is in a Harvard rowing scull with a collegiate crew in matching shorts and polo shirts with cable-knit letter sweaters tied preppie style around their necks.

Hillary Clinton has hired a captain and a crew to take her here and there in a no-wood-whatsoever fiberglass motoryacht. Intercoms connect two master staterooms, one marked “Hill” and the other “Bill.”

I can’t help it. Ron Paul is rowing a dinghy with one oar. Dennis Kucinich is drifting in the main channel in an inflatable that’s losing air and he’s screaming Look at me! Look at me!

George Washington is still my captain.

NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION: LET'S GO BOATING!

2009-02-17T15:57:00.000-08:00

New Year's Resolution: Let's go boating!
By Barb Hansen
January 2008

Making resolutions for the New Year is a good thing even when we don't always do what we say we're going to do.

Most important, it says we want to be better people. That is, we haven't given up on ourselves.

In this column, I went public with five boating resolutions for the New Year, 2002. To the extent that I did not succeed, I'll blame lack of time, not good intentions. To the extent that I succeeded, I'll credit the subject matter – boating.

I believe they are still good, for me, and hope my desires will rub off on you as well. Therefore, I hereby declare these remain my resolutions for the 2008 and I've changed the date accordingly.

1. We resolve to go boating more in 2008 than in 2007. Last year and in years before we sacrificed leisure time for work. This comes from a little voice in the head that keeps whispering work-before-pleasure, work-before-pleasure. It's hard to out-shout that voice because, alas, there's always more work to do. But, good news. Doctors say a well-balanced life must include leisure as well as work. Hopefully, our newly-balanced life will include more time on the boat. Thanks Doc.

2. We enjoy boating so much that we want others to have the same feeling. In 2008 I’ll ask our friends to join us on the boat more often. I read somewhere that if you take up an activity before the age of 15 years, you’re more likely to continue it as an adult. So, when we invite our friends to cruise with us, we’ll ask them to bring their children or grandchildren, too. In 2008, we resolve to introduce boating to more young people, both friends and clients alike. We want them to catch the boating bug, too.

3. We are in awe of Mother Nature. Where the water meets the sky and earth, she is a huge, felt presence – beautiful and inspiring: It's a privilege to see her sunrises and sunsets, no two the same; her birds of prey on the wing…or pecking their way across a sand bar. In 2008 I resolve to learn more about the things I see that give me such pleasure. I'll get out my bird book and learn all the varieties of shorebirds again. I'll try to identify each shell I pick up before I add it to my collection. We are in awe of all that surrounds us and we are lucky to live in such a beautiful part of the world.

4. Where we boat there are hundreds of small, uninhabited islands and when we cruise by them we sometimes wonder what they're like. The birds own most but others have untouched, inviting beaches and there's a rise to the ground that suggests to me that people lived there years ago. Maybe they left behind a tangible record of their lives -- arrowheads and pottery. In 2008 we will launch the dinghy more in search of the spectacular history of southwest Florida, from the Calusa Indians to the Cuban fishermen. Our Islands are rich in history. I plan to learn more of that history in 2008.

5. I love books and own a stack of award-winning novels, biographies and historical fiction unseen by my eyes. Birthdays, holidays and anniversaries come and go. I get new books; my stack gets taller. Our boat has a special place where a body can curl up and read a good book. I'll put my books on the boat. When we go cruising in 2008 I will read my books.

You may have noted in the wording above the use of the royal "we." Vic didn’t ask to be included in my resolutions but, as I read them over, I realize I've included him anyway. Oh well. Like a good meal and a nice bottle of wine, New Year's resolutions are better when you can share them with someone special.

BOATING IS THE BEST KIND OF HOLIDAY RUSH

2009-02-17T15:55:00.000-08:00

Boating is the Best Kind of Holiday Rush
By Barb Hansen
December 2007

Vic and I did not join the elbowing crowds to save a buck or two at Circuit City on Black Friday. We do not need an interactive game console, thank you. We already have one. A boat.

I understand that playing computer games is a rush. But what kind of rush is it? Is it an adrenaline rush? If so, it doesn't sound healthy to me. It seems to me we all get enough stress in our lives without the need to produce it artificially.

Lots of things give us rushes but that doesn't make them good. Shopping till you drop is a rush for some people. It may also be unhealthy physically, not to mention financially.

How many times have we fallen victim to HSF (Holiday Shopping Frenzy) – finding the perfect gift for Aunt Harriett or Uncle George or the very latest and only the very latest fashionable $100 tennis shoes for Junior? You get the picture.

And then there are the parties, the hostess gifts and don't forget the mailman and the paperboy. Whew!

Every holiday season I find myself wishing that people would spend their hard-earned money on things that can really make a positive difference in their lives – yes, like boating. Maybe I'm wrong but it seems to me that playing World of Warcraft on your Xbox falls into the wrong category.

So what's the point? I would say that when we buy gifts for others and for ourselves maybe we should apply the "rush standard" to our decision. In other words, we should ask ourselves, "Will this purchase produce a healthy rush or an unhealthy rush?"

This brings me back to boating. I happen to think boating produces the healthiest rush of any diversion, especially including interactive computer games.

Like the game console you can buy at Circuit City or Best Buy, our boat console manipulates a visual display. Our console shows an ever-moving panorama of beautiful scenes framed by blue sky and blue-green water.

Like the electronic version, our game has a console with manipulating devices such as a steering wheel and throttles. (You could call them joysticks.) They make the visual display turn this way or that, and go slower or faster, forward or backward. For real.

Unlike the indoor game console, our outdoor console game supplies us with fresh air and rewards us with unexpectedly exhilarating sights such as dolphins surfing the bow wake or a family of manatees chewing on seagrasses.

Now, that's a rush.

FLOAT YOUR VACATION HOME

2009-02-17T15:52:00.000-08:00

Float Your Vacation Home
By Barb Hansen
November 2007

I just opened my property tax bill. Yikes!

You've heard about Florida's sky-high property taxes? Alas, it's true. Tallahassee even called a special session to try to lower property taxes. State legislators (Motto: You shake the trees--We rake the leaves) don't get much practice lowering taxes so they're not very good at it.

I don’t know about you, but it seems that this year the cost of living has flown off the charts. It's not only higher property taxes and insurance rates, it's the electric bill and the weekly trip to the grocery store where the bottom line on the register receipt looks like the national debt.

Even the airlines are rubbing salt into our checkbook wounds. When you try to book a flight with your frequent flyer miles, they tell you there are no seats available. ("But, sir, I'm calling for reservations two years from now.")

It's the high property taxes that rankle the most. Which brings me to the point of this essay.

The best home deal in the state of Florida is probably a boat.

Think about it. Liveaboard boat owners don't pay property taxes. They pay a monthly fee to the marina to keep the boat in the slip and to stay hooked up to fresh water and electric. That's just about it.

Please promise me you will not tell our elected officials. If you do, sure as shooting they will raise taxes on boats and marine services. Does anybody remember the disastrous consequences of the Luxury Tax?

Richard and Suzy Koths live in Michigan but their second home is a 42-foot boat in Florida. They keep Final Sea-Lection with the Southwest Florida Yachts charter fleet and live on it when they visit. When the Koths retire, they'll already have their winter home at a marina where the water never freezes. Putting their vessel in the charter fleet even helps pay for their home away from home.

Liveaboard vessels also make great vacation rental homes for a week or so. They are certainly a lot less expensive than those resorts where every meal comes with a big bill and a wait person who seems to like to say "great choice" and "awesome."

You'll keep reaching deep to tip the pool boy and pay for the beach cabana and kids' activities. And don't forget the extras you discover on the final bill which they slip under your door while you're sleeping.

There is no pool boy to tip on a charter boat. You can cook aboard, fish, read or putt-putt the dinghy over to a deserted key so the kids can hunt for treasure. If you feel like it, you can put out a line, catch a fish and cook it for dinner.

But the biggest advantage to living aboard and vacationing aboard may be the fact that every day your vessel brings you at least two of the essentials of a satisfying life – rest and relaxation. Some would add another of life's essentials – romance – to this list.

Come to think of it, when you're on a boat two more necessities of life, sleep and sustenance, seem more satisfying than ever. Even peanut butter and jelly sandwiches taste especially good when you and yours are up on the fly bridge with wind and smiles on your faces.

FLORIDA'S FOUR SEASONS

2009-02-17T15:46:00.000-08:00

Florida’s Four Seasons
By Barb Hansen
October 2007

Did you hear the one about the Midwest tourist couple talking about Florida’s weather?

The husband says, “Wow, the seasons never seem to change in Florida!” His wife answers, “Of course they change; Florida has a ‘high’ season and a ‘low’ season!”

While that line might bring on a chuckle, it’s not quite accurate. As a native Florida cracker who spent about 20 years in the Midwest, I can tell you that I feel the change of seasons in the Sunshine State just as much as I did back in Indiana.

Florida does have four seasons and that’s in addition to the seasons of mating love bugs and early bird dinner specials. The temperature differential may not be as dramatic in Fort Myers as it is in Fort Wayne, but signs of seasonal change are just as unmistakable if you are tuned in to the sights and sounds of the tropics.

Summer arrives with the first thunderstorm and the “full moon in June” as the saying goes. Shy cereus cactus flowers make their one-night-only appearances in June. Summer mornings are clear and clouds build throughout the day. On the water, the tarpon are rolling and a fishing frenzy ensues in the waters of Southwest Florida.

Summer is relaxing on the flybridge, in the shade of a Bimini, with a cool drink in hand, watching a pod of dolphins circle in on their fresh fish entrée.

The full moon in late September this year was as big and as beautiful as it can be and it was accompanied by the most delicious breeze from the north, a harbinger of a well-deserved, cooler weather for those of us who live in this tropical paradise. Now, for at least nine months more, the climate will be exceptionally good here in Southwest Florida.

Winter is wonderful, of course. I think of it as the season of roseate spoonbills, herons, egrets and wood storks feeding on a mud flat at low tide. Natives get chilly sometimes but those who know how cold it gets in other climes are comfortable and so grateful they are not shoveling snow. Personally, I like a wind chill of 75 degrees and break out the winter jacket when the temperature drops into the 60’s.

By late March, the cold fronts seem to lose their punch and the flora and fauna of spring emerge. April and May are a special time of the year when tired, tiny tanagers and warblers hitch rides and a rest on your boat railing before flitting off in search of a berry tree on Sanibel Island. Our eyes and noses delight in the flowering trees -- fragrant yellow frangipani, fire-red poinciana, lavender-blue jacaranda.

I love it here in Southwest Florida, as you can tell. Still, I’ve come to the point of view that no one place is perfect unless we make it so. I like to read and when I’m wrapped up in a great novel I don't care where I am so long as the chair’s comfortable. In fact, if it were snowing outside and I was close to a crackling fire, that would be just dandy.

But dyed in the wool boaters logically migrate toward Florida (and they will leave their woolens behind). Snow skiers probably want to be close to the Rockies, High Sierras, or the Cascades. Surfers prefer the Pacific. We have traveled to all of those places and beyond, but as Dorothy said, “There’s no place like home.”

So maybe no one place is perfect but, like those snowbirds on the yacht pulpit, we can fly to some other place and suit our changing weather whims.

Whatever the season, Florida suits me just fine.

CAN YOU SLOGO?

2007-09-23T11:17:00.001-07:00

Can you Slogo?
By Barb Hansen
September 2007

Do you know what a slogo is? A new dance? A new type of electronic device? A local gourmet delicacy? Nope. None of the above.

Slogo is the nickname that advertising gurus use for a slogan that becomes part of a company’s logo. Creating the perfect company slogan ain’t easy. There are good ones. There are bad ones. And perfection doesn’t exist on our planet. Even the best ones usually hold up only a few years. McDonalds advertises so much it changes its slogan every three years or so just to stay culturally fresh.

Talking about creating company slogans is inside-baseball or, more appropriately, inside-boating, but it’s on my mind, on my mind, on my mind. It is sort of the linguistic version of the potato chip slogan – Bet you can’t eat just one.

But … ta da … Southwest Florida Yachts will be 25 years old in 2009 and Vic and I thought it would be nice if we had a real company slogan just like the big companies. We’ll put it on ads and brochures, websites and letterhead, just like the big companies.

With a company slogan our yacht chartering, yacht school and yacht sales enterprise tucked away on a pretty little Florida tidal creek will be right up there with Rice Krispies’ Snap, Crackle and Pop, United Airlines’ Fly the Friendly Skies, and Nike’s Just Do It.

But, like I said, creating the ideal company slogan is not easy. Kentucky Fried Chicken has a great slogan, Finger-lickin’ good. But, alas, American slang doesn’t always translate into other languages very well. In Chinese finger-lickin’ good became “Eat your fingers off.” And The Pepsi Generation slogan somehow became, in China, “Pepsi brings your ancestors back from the grave.”

The experts say a slogan is like mental shorthand for what the company sells or what it does or what they want you to do or feel. Thus you get slogans like Xerox’ The Document Company, McDonald’s I’m Loving It, Macintosh’s Think Different, and one of Vic’s favorites, Home Depot – You can do it. We can help.

At our company somebody can learn to operate a yacht, charter a yacht, then buy a yacht, and some even put their yacht back into charter service to offset the expense. So we needed a slogan that generally rewarded all three operations.

After much brainstorming and deliberating over long lists late at night in the, ahem, executive offices, we have selected our first company slogan.

The new slogan, underscored with stylistic blue “waves” is – Experience the Boating Life! It is positioned just below the Southwest Florida Yachts logo. We like it because it encourages individuals to investigate the boating way of life. And, after all, this is what we’re selling. It’s not just a product or a service; it’s a lifestyle

Vic and I are as excited today about what we do at Southwest Florida Yachts as we were when we started almost 25 years ago. We continue to be thrilled helping people get into boating and seeing them adopt boating as a life-long adventure, with the proper skills and experience under their keels.

All that said, may I leave you with this medical advice? If you ever have to create a company slogan, take two aspirins and don’t call me in the morning.

And do me a favor. Don’t translate our slogan into another language.

SKIPAGENERATIONAL COMMUNICATIONS

2007-08-01T11:09:00.000-07:00

Skipagenerational Communications Phenomenon
By Barb Hansen
August 2007

Grandparents and grandchildren communicate in a special kind of way.

Here’s a for instance: The grandmother is on the floor with a four-year-old boy building a Lego garage for his new fire truck. She even makes truck engine and siren-like noises.

And here’s the granddad with his five-year-old granddaughter holding a birthday party for Barbie and her friends. Who would have thought a granddad could fuss over Rapunzel’s long hair?

This kind of communication involves words, certainly, but also hand gestures, and probably some sounds that would sound weird unless you were also privy to this special wave length.

I am not a doctor. I arrange yacht charters and liveaboard yacht courses for a living. But I am a keen observer of human behavior. I call this Skipagenerational Communications Phenomenon (SCP).

This is not to knock the terrific two-generational communications I’ve noted in some families, especially boating families. The Fort family of Spartanburg, South Carolina comes to mind. Dad, mom, daughter and two sons took courses at Florida Cruising and Sailing School. The older son went sailing while the rest took Powerboat 101-102. After they returned home, I got a super, nice letter from the dad thanking us for the courses and I could tell by the tone that this is a family generous with its compliments to others and to each other.

But Skipagenerational Communications Phenomenon is different. I’ve asked grandparents about it and they confirm that it exists. One suggested the possibility of a special gene that kicks in when a grandchild enters the life of a grandparent. “I didn’t realize how connected I would feel to a child that wasn’t my own except that of course, it is my child, isn't it?”

Grandkids, meanwhile, may wonder what the fuss is all about. But when GPs are passing out pocket or purse change and Cheetos, one doesn’t argue, does one?

Parents, busy with what parents do and grateful for the free baby-sitting service, usually just stay out of the way.

The GP-GK connection stays strong through the years. Good anecdotal evidence of this occurs when the grandchildren grow out of toddlerhood and grandparents take them on a cruise.

Recently, we chartered a vessel for a cruise by three generations of the Family Trachtenberg of Pennsylvania. Grandparents. Parents. Grandson, 7. Perfect.

Granddad Joe Trachtenberg wrote me that this was one of the best vacations the family ever had. When they put in at South Seas Plantation’s marina they saw manatees all around them. Do you think that made an impression on a seven-year-old? Do you think Grandmother took note? Oh. My. Yes.

Maybe a seven-year-old camped out under the stars on the foredeck. Maybe he got to wear his favorite T-shirt all week. I didn’t ask.

Something uplifting happened. Perhaps a certain young person got to stay up later than he ever has in his whole life and listen to his granddad tell ghost stories. I wouldn’t have been surprised to learn that the grandson got to sit at the helm station with Granddad and steer a Mainship 43 for a few minutes. Or, that Grandmother Trachtenberg made her very special pancakes one morning. By special request.

So far as I know the scientific literature hasn’t discussed SCP but marketing people are clearly aware of it. I've seen advertisements for multi-generational vacations for Disney, dude ranches and cruises.

Three-generation vacations always give extended families a chance to reconnect. Mom and Dad get a little break from taking care of the kids 24/7. Grandma and Grandpa treasure the time that the entire family is together.

But that special communications link between grandparents and grandchildren is, truly, the two-part epoxy that glues all three generations together so tightly.

PARIS HILTON'S CHANGES IN ATTITUDE

2007-07-01T11:05:00.000-07:00

Paris Hilton’s Changes in Attitude
By Barb Hansen
July 2007

The doctor is IN.

It will be interesting to see if Paris Hilton’s change of heart has legs. I tend to doubt it.

She told Larry King after her 23-day incarceration that she was going to change. When he asked her what she would like to change about herself she told him that when she got nervous her voice became higher-pitched. She’d like to change that, she said.

What does this have to do with boating? Here’s what: she also complained that her jail cell was just an 8 X 12 and I thought, wow, if that were a cabin on a boat, it would be huge.

Unfortunately for her, Paris Hilton doesn’t have much at all to do with boating except, perhaps, an occasional photo shoot on a vessel. Neither, so far as I know, do two other Hollywood tabloiders also in need of attitude adjustments, Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan.

Too bad for them because if they were regular boaters I think it would help them stay on an even keel and avoid angering policemen on the mean streets of L.A. at 5 in the morning.

Think about it. How many times have you read in the paper, “The suspect, an avid yachtsman, was jailed on charges of bank robbery.” Never. Or, “The accused is an Olympic sailing champion.” Doesn’t fit, does it?

Truly, boating helps us keep our heads screwed on straight.

It is a change of scenery, at least. Boating gets us away from what reminds us of work. It is for when we’re up to our earlobes in cell calls and our inbox is jammed with unanswered messages. When you’re at home and you’re getting calls from the office, it’s time.

Boating is anti-anxiety medicine and we don’t even need a prescription. It requires a certain amount of physical effort as well as mental concentration. This keeps the worries away. A little anxiety even helps one lift the anchor.

Sleep on a boat is the best medicine, the epitome of rest and relation. (An 8 X 12 space is plenty big, Paris.) Alas, jail cells don’t give beds that gentle rock-me-to-sleep motion that you get in a boat.

Boating is, for the most part, wholesome, nurturing and a way for families and friends to grow closer.

Boating is the best R and R, in my book, and it’s not just me saying this. A few years ago researchers asked Americans about the quality of their lives. Boat owners said they were happier and healthier, too. Boat owners reported they experienced greater self-esteem, enjoyed life more, and had better sex lives. Non-boat owners were more prone to feeling useless, lonely, unhappy and tired.

Another survey suggested that children who got involved in boating were healthier, physically and psychologically, than their non-boating counterparts. It is too bad that Paris’ parents didn’t get her involved in a boating program when she was in their charge.

Well, anyway, rehab on a boat is probably too late for Miss Hilton and friends. Besides, I’m not sure I’d wish her on the boating industry. Her behavior suggests a different kind of “getaway.” She could ask Britney and Lindsay for their personal recommendations. Maybe she could get some voice lessons, too.

VIVE LA DIFFERENCE

2007-06-01T11:00:00.000-07:00

Vive la Difference
By Barb Hansen
June 2007

Michael Kearney of Plymouth, England chartered the yacht Markat for a week in March. Later he wrote to say he really enjoyed cruising our Sanibel-Captiva barrier island paradise. But, also, he wanted us to know that the “Miserable Mile” was not as bad as he imagined.

The Miserable Mile is a stretch of Gulf Intracoastal Waterway that runs generally east and west across the bottom of Pine Island. Sometimes the tide runs pretty fast and a skipper must make sure his vessel stays in the channel. That’s about it. It’s not exactly a mile and it’s not miserable…most of the time.

I realize that it has a lot to do with what you’re used to. Michael wrote that in his homeport, Plymouth, the water is 90 feet deep at high tide. In Plymouth, they don’t worry about running aground.

I guess it’s human nature to imagine the worst. Old sea charts designated unexplored waters with the sketches and the warning, “Here Be Monsters.” Today, when some boating writer calls a section of channel the “Miserable Mile” our imaginations conjure up the equivalent of monsters. But, here in Southwest Florida, If your vessel moves outside the channel, it will not break into pieces on a rocky cliff. Get too far adrift and you could scrape the bottom on a sand flat. That’s not good. But everything will be okay. Monsters do not lurk there.

Caution is a virtue. It can keep us alive. But being too cautious can keep us from doing things we ought to do. Most of the cruising people I know strike a good balance between caution and courage. They recognize the risks. They plan what to do in an emergency. But they don’t let their caution turn into paralyzing fear. Cruising new water fuels their dream machine. They do the research. They plan. They take precautions, if necessary. They cruise. I suspect Michael Kearney is one of those careful-and-adventuresome skippers.

Michael learned about cruising with Southwest Florida Yachts in a British publication, Motor Boat and Yachting, which put Southwest Florida in its top ten list of bareboat yacht charter destinations. The article also noted that when Brits and other European readers think of Florida, they think of Florida’s East Coast, usually Miami and Fort Lauderdale. For a welcome change, the article suggested that readers consider chartering on Florida’s West Coast. They took the words right out of my mouth.

Florida’s East Coast is high-energy, high-rise. Florida’s West Coast is a laid-back, low-rise sanctuary of green and blue surprises. Vive la difference.

In the shallow, sandy cruising water of Southwest Florida you can look into the clear water and see the bottom. Maybe you’ll spook a ray from his sandy hiding place. Over there, you could see a leopard ray gracefully moving across the grass flat. A dolphin or two will surf your bow wake. On low tide, you’ll pass sand flats and oyster bars hosting roseate spoonbills, herons, ibis, wood storks, and egrets. Look up and you’re likely to see the magnificent frigatebird with its seven-foot wingspan drawing figure eights in the air. Anchored up, you might see a manatee family swim curiously by your vessel.

Michael said he’d be back to cruise with us again and we look forward to outfitting him again. I hope he tells all of his cruising mates in Plymouth and beyond. The stars are aligned well this year for Europe-to-U.S. vacation visits. The Euro-to-dollar exchange rate makes visiting the U.S. a bargain. Florida’s low summer rates make it even more of a bargain.

Thousands of Europeans visit and enjoy our area every summer. In the restaurants and shops I hear the enthusiasm in the voices of Brits, Germans and Frenchmen. But I suspect they don’t know what Michael Kearney knows. It’s even better in a boat.

Vive la difference.

BOATING'S LESSONS FOR SUCCESSFUL LIVING

2007-05-01T15:11:00.000-07:00

Boating’s Lessons for Successful Living
By Barb Hansen
May 2007

For almost 25 years I’ve been booking students for Florida Sailing & Cruising School. Some time along the way as I watched students work with their instructors something occurred to me. I think it’s important.

Walking along the dock I’d overhear the instructors showing students how to set the anchor properly, how to radio a bridge tender to open the span, how to diagnose an engine problem, or how to back a big wide boat into a tight little slip.

And over and over what I also heard the instructors say were things like “plan ahead,” “accept responsibility,” and “know the rules.”

And what occurred to me was this: They were teaching exactly the same things you would hear if you attended one of those success-in-life seminars. Set goals, they’d say. Prepare, practice, challenge yourself. Be a team player, accept responsibility, follow the rules. Even, get your sleep. And, importantly, laugh a lot.

So over time I became even more convinced that the big lessons we need to learn to lead a successful life are the very same lessons we need to know to be a successful boater. And vice versa. I’m sure that other recreations require many of the same skills but I can’t think of any except boating that combines all so thoroughly.

My theory got an endorsement of sorts last year when the Harvard family of Roswell, N.M. came to Florida in August to take a six-day live-aboard yacht course and cruise. The students were parents Jeff and Jane and their two adults-in-training, Jeremy, 15, and Julia, 11. Captain Gary Graham, their instructor, said the Harvards were terrific students and applied themselves individually and as team members to make their week aboard successful.

Jeff Harvard said he liked the continuing series of challenges and solving them in a relaxed, non-stressful environment. Jane told me she liked the adventure of it, the confidence building, and the opportunity for the family to pull together for a common goal. Of course, this was all music to my ears.

I don’t mean to give all the credit to our boating school. I believe that boating itself is a good teacher. Capt. Chris Day, another one of our instructors, tells the story of a rich investor in the northeast who lost all his money and took to drinking. His wife made him leave home. A good friend gave him an old sailboat with no sails, just a place to sleep really. Something inspired him to make it move. He went to Wal-Mart and bought some blue tarps with grommets. He put up the mast and his tarps and left Boston, heading south. Along the way he encountered many challenges, all of which he managed to solve. Finally, years later, he arrived in Key West and when he arrived, he was sober. In fact, he had given up drinking entirely.

In the last 23 years we’ve had many students including some tough characters who probably wouldn’t sit still for a life-success seminar but who would bust their fanny to excel at an assigned task from the instructor.

Our liveaboard school is about better sailing and cruising, and not about leading a successful life, but whether students make the connection or not, learning to operate a yacht can be like the honey that helps the medicine go down.

I like to think that all of our boating school students return to their various worlds better people as well as better boaters.

TOMBSTONES FOR BUSY PEOPLE

2007-04-01T15:09:00.000-07:00

Tombstones for Busy People
By Barb Hansen
April 1, 2007
Revised from July 1, 2005

This nation has a big problem. I call it The Big O.

No, not obesity. Overscheduling.

Simon and Garfunkel diagnosed this ailment years ago with their Feeling Groovy song.

Slow down, you move too fast. You’ve got to make the morning last. Just kicking down the cobble stones, lookin’ for fun and feelin’ groovy.

The problem was clearly evident 40 years ago when that song was popular. It’s much worse now. We try to do too much in not enough time. To get more done we even cut back on sleep. I read that 100 years ago Americans averaged 9.5 hours of sleep a night. Today, we average 7 hours and many “get by” on much less than that.

Why do we do this to ourselves? We do it, psychologists tell us, because it makes us feel important. We are sending a message to others. "I’m 24/7, man. Notice how busy I am? I am really important."

Now we don’t even do just one thing at a time. We multi-task. We carry on a phone conversation while typing an email message and also keeping an ear cocked for breaking news on the cable channel. Even the TV channel is multi-tasking. There’s a split screen showing two things going on at once, plus an audio track, plus text of news bits crawling across the bottom of the screen.

But it gets worse. Some too-busy people overschedule their vacations, too. As the chief cook and concierge at a certain yacht chartering firm, I have seen The Big O disease reach problematical proportions. Power cruisers are the worst. They are more point A to point B types. Crank up the RPMs, get me to the marina on time, and all that. Sailors are much more patient. They know you can’t depend on the wind and while they don’t mind starting the auxiliary from time to time, they’d really rather be sailing with no particular place to go. Thanks Chuck Berry

I won’t name names but we had a customer, an accomplished boater, who was qualified to skipper one of our trawlers without a captain. He’s a fast-charging, get ‘er done, check-it-off kind of guy. He arrived four hours late and missed his appointment to get checked out on the boat and was miffed nobody would stay late to do it. After his check out the next morning, anxious to get back on his self-imposed schedule, he pulled the vessel out of the slip and navigated right into the teeth of a heavy rain storm.

The best prescription I know for The Big O is cruising. Your hometown paper is not delivered to the aft deck. Cell phones don’t always get a signal. The TV screen is small; reception is poor. If you don't get the message, you're listening too hard. Tap, tap, Mr. and Mrs. Chronic Busy. You. Turn off the phone and the TV. Pick up a novel instead of a newspaper. Close your eyelids and drift into a delicious nap. Get that groovy feeling again. Just last week a charter client asked if they could take the TV off the boat for their cruise. That’s the idea.

There is another way out, not so groovy, not so inviting. It’s called The Big Sleep. It’s very popular among The Big O set and if you are one of those overscheduled types you are most welcome to engrave one of these sayings on your tombstone for use at the appointed time, fast approaching.

Notice how important I am.

I've got so much to do.

Or (with apologies to Emily Dickinson) this paraphrase of one of her famous poems:

Because I would not stop for Life-- He kindly stopped for me--

ALASKA CRUISING ADVICE: THINK SMALL

2007-03-01T15:08:00.000-08:00

Alaska Cruising Advice: Think Small
By Barb Hansen
March 2007

Here’s the television commercial I’d like to make.

The camera is looking down on the Southeast Alaskan shoreline from 50 miles in the sky. On the screen and we see the words, “Alaska Cruising Advice.”

The camera zooms in and now we recognize snow-capped mountains and glaciers curving down to the sea. More slowly now, the camera moves in closer and reveals a quiet cove with a gleaming yacht and five kayaks paddling from the mother ship toward the shore. You hear majestic music, and the high, clear call of a whale.

Abruptly the music stops. We get a view of a massive cruise ship out in the open sea. It slowly moves out of sight. Then the camera and the music return to the tranquil, happy scene in the cove.

Then, one by one, words roll up on the screen and park themselves into one sentence--“Friends-don’t-let-friends-see-Alaska-on-a-cruise-ship.”

Vic and I are convinced. In 2004, to mark our 20th anniversary, we did a little personal research. From Seattle we flew to Sitka, about 90 minutes southeast of Anchorage. We boarded Ursa Major, a 65-foot, Malahide wooden hull trawler. It’s the perfect boat to see Alaska.

The Ursa Major took us graciously along this spectacular American coastline. She turned into quaint harbors with fishing villages and nosed into fjords with calving glaciers and waterfalls. We watched sea lions, otters, eagles and even a mother bear with three cubs moving along the shoreline.

You need to cruise Alaska at least once in your lifetime. And, when you do, here’s a word of advice. Don’t book passage on a cruise ship. Big cruise ships don’t fit in and don’t dare enter the best coves. Big cruise ships don’t let you slide a kayak into the water to explore a waterfall or walk the shoreline to some hot springs. Big cruise ships don’t let you put a fishing line in the water to catch a fresh fish for dinner.

Big cruise ships move at night past scenery passengers never get to see. Ursa Major overnights quietly in isolated coves. While big ship sheep shuffle down the buffet line, guests on Ursa Major applaud the chef’s cold smoked salmon, salmon caviar, and stuffed grape leaves. They fall asleep to the unique sound of a remote wilderness. In the morning, their alarm clock is fresh-baked bread. At lunch, between spoonfuls of hearty homemade soup, they share experiences with new friends.

Those who know how much I love cruising Southwest Florida must be thinking, “Is this the same Barb Hansen who writes about the glories of cruising the beautiful Sanibel-Captiva-Useppa-Cayo Costa?”

No worries, Mate. I’m still Southwest Florida’s number one cruising fan. But once or twice in our short lives I think we owe it to ourselves to cruise the second most wonderful place on the water planet – Alaska.

Vic and I are hosting another cruise through Southeast Alaska this summer. If you would like to join us aboard the Ursa Major, just give me a call. We have cabins reserved.

Think of it as a gourmet cruise, with friends, on a kind vessel that is just the right size to experience America’s last piece of real shoreline wilderness.

BARB'S STATE OF THE UNION

2007-02-01T15:08:00.000-08:00

Barb’s State of the Union
By Barb Hansen
February 2007

Thank you very much, Madame Speaker, Mr. Vice President, members of Congress, distinguished guests, and fellow boaters.

Despite what you read in the media, the state of our favorite form of recreation -- boating -- has never been stronger.

For many Americans, for generations, boating has brought fulfillment that no other form of recreation can match.

For the newly married couple the search for and purchase of their first boat has symbolized a lifelong commitment to each other and to the institution of marriage.

Parents and children cruise, water-ski, fish, paddle and set sail together. Boating builds stronger families and stronger persons and makes our country stronger, too.

Young men and women grow into more responsible adults because of the responsibility that boating teaches.

For newly retired couples, boating is the vessel that helps them chart and sail to new horizons.

From Seattle to Sanibel and from Cape Hatteras to Half Moon Bay recreational boating reinforces the inherent dignity and the birth right of freedom of every person.

Madame Speaker, my administration will be proposing to the Congress of the United States a set of initiatives to address certain boating issues that have long been ignored and, until remedied, will be like a chalky substance on the fiberglass hull, corrosion on the hardware, and sun- and mold-streaked sections on the teak decks of the American way of life.

Our cause is just, and it continues.

We ask the Congress to join the administration in passing “Barb’s Better Boating Bill,” a set of three critical initiatives.

First, we ask lawmakers to support the heavenly cause of peace and quiet by pointing the nation’s finger of shame and blame on every boater who violates marina environmental etiquette.

We recommend penalties for those whose stereos and noisy generators continue to disrupt the fabric of our nation’s sleep patterns. Permit me to add, on a personal note, that if those inconsiderate people insist on playing their stereos after hours would they please, for goodness’ sake, at least play some Sergio Mendez & Brasil ‘66.

Secondly, we propose an urgent national program to help waterfront restaurants expand their menus so that they serve more than just hamburgers and fries. I don’t mean that they have to add crepe suzettes with fresh strawberries to the menu but would it kill them to offer a big, fresh salad?

Finally, I want the Congress to address the urgent issue of boater education. Next week my administration will ask the Congress to allocate the appropriate resources to each state, based on number of boat registrations, to initiate programs that once and for all time eradicate the disease of boat docking disasters. How long, oh how long must all those in the marina listen to the gut-wrenching sound of a moveable object -- a boat -- forcibly crunching into an immovable object -- a dock.

This program would provide a sizeable tax deduction for seeking a degree from an academic institution, including the highly-regarded liveaboard yacht school in North Fort Myers called the Florida Sailing & Cruising School. No, this is not an earmark.

From sea to shining sea boating has demonstrated its power to make our people better citizens and our country stronger. Steadfast in our purpose, we now press on.

My fellow Americans, this is the time to answer the plaintive call of our boat-loving countrymen to be able to get a good nights sleep in a popular marina, have better things to eat while boating, and to have the confidence and ability to back a big boat into a little slip anywhere, anytime.

Let no boater be left behind. God bless you and God bless America's boaters.

ADVENTURES IN RETIREMENT

2007-01-01T15:06:00.000-08:00

Adventures in Retirement
By Barb Hansen
January 2007

Thanks to medical science we are living longer. Thanks to ibuprofen, we’re also functioning longer.

Retirees, especially, are beneficiaries. With time and a bottle of friendly caplets on their side they can do things earlier generations of retirees could not. Instead of sitting in a rocker and watching re-runs of Golden Girls, retirees today are sitting in a catbird seat and self-directing their lives into new and exciting adventures.

I know this because in my job as proprietor of a yacht school and chartering enterprise I have been privileged to talk to some of these adventurers and I am watching the first wave of boomers plan and take action for the best years of their lives.

Bruce and Margaret Ellen have chartered with us many times. When Bruce retired they cruised from Myrtle Beach on the East Coast to Fort Myers then back again. In two years they put 270 hours and 3,000 miles on their boat.

I put Richard and Suzy Koths of Michigan in this category. Though some years away from retirement, the Koths own a 42-foot motoryacht which they put into our charter fleet. It helps pay for the boat, upgrades and upkeep. When they retire, they’ll already have their winter home in Florida adjacent to one of the great cruising destinations in the world.

Many people who attend our liveaboard yacht school are finishing up their careers and soon will have the time to do what they really want to do. Cruising is a big part of their retirement plan. More than once I have heard talk about cruising “The Great Loop.” Sometimes called the Great Circle Route, this is the continuous waterway that takes cruisers up the Atlantic Seaboard, across the Great Lakes, down the Mississippi, and along the Gulf of Mexico. They even have their own association.

Cruising the Great Loop seems somehow appropriate for our goal-setting culture. Buried in our careers we seek to build a nest egg and to provide for the future. Once security is in our sights, we look to fulfill another basic instinct -- adventure. An ambitious plan like cruising the Great Circle Route does that.

Cruising also is a civilized way to fulfill the deep-seated desire we all have to return to the basics. I call this satisfying our “call of the wild” instinct. Instead of a closet full of clothes and shoes, we bring onboard a duffel bag’s worth of basics and boat shoes. Cruisers know that so long as their clothes suit the weather their outfit is probably perfect for every occasion.

Once upon a time Dinah Shore sang about seeing the USA in your Chevrolet. Today, she could be singing about seeing the USA in your cruising boat. Cruising is a great way to see the USA without having to pull your wheeled vehicle into a gas station every few hours and an interstate motel every night. When you’re cruising, you don’t have to pack and unpack every night. With cruising, your castle is also your mode of transport. It’s fun. It’s scenic. It’s very economical. It’s romantic.

Today’s new generation of retirees are redefining “sailing into the sunset.”

FIVE WAYS BOATING IS THE BEST GIFT

2006-12-01T15:04:00.000-08:00

Five Ways Boating is the Best Gift
By Barb Hansen
December 2006

A few years ago a single man took one of our liveaboard yacht courses all by himself.

The student and the instructor spent a day covering all the basics right up to anchoring for the night. The student did well. The day was done. But then he asked the instructor what he should do after anchoring and securing the boat. Our instructor asked him pointedly why did he want to cruise anyway unless he had somebody to enjoy it with. The man thought about this for some long, silent moments. Then he said, “I think I should think about being in a relationship.”

Yes! There’s something about boating that insists, practically and emotionally, that it be done in the company of others. Cruising, especially, is made for couples and families. It’s a shared adventure. It’s all about teamwork and accomplishing something together. In my book, cruising together is the ultimate in quality time.

Relationship building is one of five reasons why I believe that boating is the best possible gift that families can give each other. The gift is not the boat. Rather, the gift is commitment that couples and families make to boating and to each other. After that, you can look for a boat to buy or, like many, just decide to charter vessels for cruises.

When you take up boating, you will discover that you have been adopted by another family, the nautical family. In case you didn’t know, we look after each other out there on the water. We wave to people we don’t know in passing boats; we rescue people we don’t know in stranded boats; we yuk it up with people we don’t know in adjacent slips.

The third reason that I believe boating is the perfect gift is that it balances your life. It requires a different set of mental and physical skills. It removes you, mentally and physically, from whatever it is you do in the workaday world. And I’m convinced all that fresh air and exercise turns boaters into the best day nappers and solid night time sleepers in the world.

By the way, research sponsored by the boating industry suggests that boaters are happier and healthier than non-boaters. Almost seven out of ten say boating has brought their family closer together. And children exposed to boating are healthier, less shy, team players, and more likely to be leaders.

Everybody complains that they don’t have enough time. Well, when you’re hooked on it, boating motivates you to make time for it. I recently heard about a physician who wanted to go boating but he never had any time off. Desire won. He closed his solo practice and went into practice with other doctors. The deal was they each would take extended time off periodically for cruising and other trips and the other physicians would look after missing doctor’s patients while he was gone. I think they’re all better people because of that decision. Especially the boating doctor.

The last and maybe the best reason why boating is the perfect gift is that boating is your magic carpet back into the last frontier. It puts you back into an environment where the “road” will never be paved and where the natural world prevails. At night, the sounds are sounds of fish jumping or waves lapping, not 18-wheelers whining out there on the Interstate highway. Communing with nature may be a cliché but it is still uplifting.

If you’re already boating, plan more. If you’re not, talk about it with the people you love.

WATERFRONT RENAISSANCE

2006-11-01T15:03:00.000-08:00

Waterfront Renaissance
By Barb Hansen
November 2006

A while back a category four weedwacker named Charley raced over Southwest Florida’s beautiful barrier islands and the picturesque waterfront communities around Charlotte Harbor.

I’ll remember Charley as the storm that made me proud of my fellow citizens who leaped to help their friends, neighbors and strangers in a jam.

I’d say it took about one day, maybe two, for everybody here to dedicate themselves to restoring their homes, businesses, and municipalities. Insurance helped, as it was supposed to. Governments, too. But in my opinion the collective can-do human spirit here made all the difference.

Southwest Florida has a lot of that can-do spirit, as well as water, sunsets, scenery and exceptionally good weather (with exceptions like Charley). It all fuels our number one claim to fame – tourism.

Boaters get the best view in my opinion. So it is with pleasure that we announce that proprietors of the waterfront services for our visitors – restaurants, marinas, resorts, inns, parks, tackle and bait shops – have put their places back into shape (and then some) and have reopened for business with a smile.

By the numbers of dolphins, manatees, and birds I judge that the natural areas are fully restored as well. I’m told that a storm like Charley actually helps rebuild wildlife habitats.

Don’t take my word for it. Power Cruising magazine’s editors cruised our paradise recently and have proclaimed that all is very well and good along our sheltered cruising corridors. Editor Pierce Hoover’s article, Surveying the Sound – A Return Visit to One of America’s Coastal Cruising Grounds, is in the November issue.

Pierce puts his “A-OK” stamp on all of our favorite ports of call -- Burnt Store Marina, Useppa Island Club, Boca Grande Marina, Cabbage Key, Cayo Costa State Park, SouthSeas Island Resort and Yacht Harbor, ‘Tween Waters Inn.

Google spent $1.6 billion on YouTube, an investment in the future of the Internet. They’re betting that millions of pairs of demographically desirable eyeballs will stay glued to videos on the World Wide Web. Maybe. Or will Google’s desirable demographic of a certain age get bug-eyed staring at a computer screen and decide they prefer real world views, not simulated views?

The people of Southwest Florida invested in the future too and have spent many times over what Google spent. We’re betting that demographically desirable human bodies (not just their eyeballs) will return for real life scenes like dolphins surfing their bow wave, a family of manatees coming by their boat to say hello, and glowing Gulf of Mexico sunsets.

Wall Street talks about companies reinventing themselves. Well Southwest Florida does not need to reinvent itself. It is what it is, what it was, and what it will be -- a blessed intersection of earth, water, and climate. Our waterfront reconstruction renaissance just makes it that much easier to enjoy.

WHAT IS YOUR BOAT TYPE?

2006-10-01T15:02:00.000-07:00

What is Your Boat Type?
By Barb Hansen
October 1, 2006

Psychologists talk about Type A's and Type B's, extroverts and introverts. Vic and I talk about Boat Types.

Vic is a yacht broker. Sometimes he works with sellers who want to list their boat for sale. However, many times he is a buyer’s broker. His job is to find a previously-owned vessel that will make a boat buyer the most happy. That may sound easy but it's not. Often, the boat buyer doesn't know what kind of boat he wants either.

So, before Vic the broker searches for the buyer's boat, Vic the doctor must diagnose the buyer's boat personality. His patients tell him about their boating dreams. Occasionally, he interrupts to ask a probing question, like "I understand you like to fish for sharks with rotten meat. And what kind of boating does your wife enjoy?" Vic has earned a psychology degree in the school called making the sale.

We could write a book about this and the chapters would be the boat personality types we most often meet. We love 'em all, our patients, boaters till the end.

1. Vertigo Vinny.
When Vinny talks about boating, his head spins and his mouth emits fast, happy sounds. Vinny's problem is, he likes all boats. Slow boats. Go-fast boats. Deep draft. Shallow draft. He can see himself having fun in every boat. Vic tries to find out what kind of boat Vinny's wife prefers. The doctor now has an opportunity to test Vinny's professed love for all boats by asking what he thinks about THIS boat. Now that's a real head-spinner.

2. Armchair Arnie.
Like any good patient, Arnie has already figured out what's wrong with his life and what he needs to make it better. Like the patient who almost became a doctor, Armchair Arnie wanted to become a marine architect but went into the family business instead. He needs a certain type of boat, of course. He knows what he wants. He also needs a little affirmation. "You agree with me, don't you, Vic?" Vic conducts the patient interviews and, satisfied that Arnie has correctly self-diagnosed, goes in search of Arnie's boat. Arnie is a great customer.

3. Hi-Lo Lil.
Lillian is going to buy a boat but she can't decide when. Gung ho today; not so tomorrow. She has the boating fever today, chills tomorrow. Vic knows the patient has to be committed to a big decision, so the doctor nurses the process along until Lillian is ready to make the commitment. I believe I have heard him ask the buyer, "Now, Lil, are you sure you are ready to do this?"

4. Contrary Connie.
Every pursuit has its Devil's Advocate types. Such is Contrary Connie. She doesn't want a boat like your boat or my boat. She wants to own a boat that nobody else has, something unique, something different, something that says, "I'm Connie and I'm contrary." And that's fine. The doctor establishes mutual trust. He gets on the same wave-length, but keeps Connie pointed toward a vessel that is suitable for her cruising water. Knowing that the doctor is committed to the mutual process, the patient relaxes and enjoys the search.

5. Captain Courageous.
Courageous wants to cruise around the world in a little boat. The doctor is between a rock and a hard place here. Does he look for a boat that might take the Captain around the world or does he attempt to talk this risk taker down from the high wire? Doctor Vic's solution is the nautical equivalent of take two aspirins and see me in the morning. It usually sounds like this. "That is a fascinating goal and an immense challenge, Captain. Let's talk about this over coffee instead of gin and tonic."

All good people, they just approach the boat selection process in different ways. The boat broker understands this and works with each according to his or her Boat Type. Real psychologists could go to school on this guy.

The doctor is in.

BOATING IN THE CHECKOUT LANE

2006-09-01T15:00:00.000-07:00

Boating in the Checkout Lane
By Barb Hansen
September 2006

Is it just me or are the boating magazines spreading too much maleonaise onto their covers?

Now, don’t get me wrong. I love boating magazines. I love them all. But, on this man-woman issue, this woman's antennae went up the other day as my grocery cart rolled past the magazine racks.

I took note of the boating magazines on display. Covers broadcast manly things like “ “Rev It Up, Prop it Up, Beat ‘em Up,” “Boost Your Horsepower,” Two-Stroke Mano-a-Mano,” and “Macho Marine Electronics – Technology for Real Men.” I kept on going.

When I got into the checkout lane I noticed that in this valuable wait-your-turn aisle there were no boating magazines. None. However, there were three rows of women’s magazines. Hmmm. I couldn’t help but notice the difference in the covers.

O – The Oprah Magazine offered an appealing invitation in a how-to piece headlined, “Let’s Shop!”

The come-on from Marie Claire was “Strong. Confident. Sexy. Be a Triple Threat.”

The only text on the cover of Martha Stewart’s Living was, compellingly, “Martha’s New Kitchen.”

Oh wow, I thought, boating magazines should go to school on the publications displayed in the checkout lanes of the world. Now, I’m not a media expert but I do know a bit about boating and I have strong credentials in the female gender category. I really think I could help these testaments to testosterone.

What the world needs now are boating magazines with more female hormones in the headline-writing department. Just think of the sales opportunity here -- boating magazines that appeal to both sexes. With a few little tweaks in their cover blurbs, millions of women will be motivated to buy boating magazines while they also shop for lettuce and Lubriderm. I see a spike in boat sales, too. (You did know, didn’t you, that we women spend most of the money and veto or approve all male spending?)

Introduce a little femaleness into the cover-design department and, it seems to me, boating magazines will motivate women of the boating persuasion (and even some who are not) to pull out the plastic.

For example, instead of a headline like Father and Son Cruise Alaska” we might see “10 Great Mother - Daughter Cruises.” And, instead of “10 Big & Bad Deckboats” we might see “10 Plush Vessels from Xanadu.” Rather than an invitation to learn about “Bottom Paint Basics” we would look forward to reading more about “Martha Stewart’s Galley.”

Then, lightning struck. POW. The. Big. Idea. A new boating magazine.

I’m calling it….ta da…CosmoShip. The cover slogan will be, “The Spice Your Life at Sea Magazine”

This magazine is going to be hot. The grocery stores won’t put this publication in the newsstand rack with the other mostly-male boating magazines. No way. This one will go in the most prestigious selling space in the history of the world -- the supermarket checkout lane.

And, why not? It will feature starlets, super models and cover blurbs as tantalizing as any you’ll see on the cover of Cosmo, Marie Claire or Glamour.

As a matter of fact, I’ve been studying the headlines for women’s magazines and I think I’ve hit on some cover blurbs for the next new star in the media world:

Engine Room Romance – Get Closer to Your Man and His Machinery
Feng Shui Afloat – Let harmony steer your vessel
Tea Time Anchorages – Reward yourself with this comforting break
Bridge Tenderness – Soothing words for needy captains
Sensuality at Sea – Romance on the Waves. A True Story.
Gratification in the Galley -- Is the U-Shape for you?
Dating on Deck – Find your soul mate at a marina
Marina Magic – I fell in love with my dock master
One Pot Meals – How to spice up dinner …and after dinner, too.

On another subject, is it just me or are the lines in the checkout lanes moving slower these days?

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Pop-Psy on the Water

2006-08-01T08:10:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
Pop-Psy on the Water
By Barb Hansen
August 1, 2006

Being an amateur psychologist, I like to analyze people by the boat names they choose. Every boat name is like a mini-psychological profile of the vessel owner.

I won’t waste your time on boats like She Got the House and She Whines a lot. They’re just too easy. Dittos for Sin or Swim, Swimsuits Optional and Nauti Couples.

Somewhere in Alabama there’s a boat called Auburnsux. I don’t ever want to meet the owner of that boat, so I won’t risk angering him (or her?) with my non-professional psycho workup.

Because they are confronting their demons, the owners of Sir Rosis of the River, Zoloft and Xanax get a pass today. And I won’t take the bait and analyze the owner of Analyse This.

The owner of Singood the Sailbad has some issues. He (or she?) needs counseling for poor sailing, that’s for sure, and maybe for good sinning, too. Or is it good singing? We’ve got a split personality here, folks.

I have to get this off my chest. You’ve seen boats named Hell Froze Over? I imagine that here we’ve got an older male individual. He was married for some years. His wife was always just dead set against him owning a boat and he sulked about that. Then something really drastic happened. I’m not saying foul play was involved but something tells me his spouse is no longer in the picture.

Anyway, I recently had a chance to take a look and reflect on the annual top ten list of the most popular boat names from Boat U.S. The winners for 2005 were, from the top, Seas the Day, Aquaholic, Island Time, Dragonfly, Pura Vida, Encore, Black Pearl, Destiny, Serenity Now and License to Chill.

Seas the Day was up from number seven in 2004. I don’t know about you but I’m picturing a preppy kind of skipper tucked between two masts. This fellow used to wear a captain’s hat and a blue blazer with lots of gold buttons and always-too-clean Top Siders. Nowadays, in a more casual world, he wears a ribbed, linen crew-neck pullover, a pair of $200 hand-sewn navy blue boat shoes, a Blackberry, and a pencil-thin mustache that he trims approximately hourly.

I picture the owner of Aquaholic as a Houston pork bellies baron. Billy Bob’s up there on the bridge of his 52-foot sportfisherman overseeing a lighted panel of information –- GPS interfaced with radar and sonar, real-time satellite images of loop currents and water temps, a 52-inch flat screen TV with satellite reception. He has a Stella Artois in his left hand and a wireless remote control in his right to control the Bose sound system which plays either Emmy Lou Harris or George Jones. The autopilot takes care of the steering but he rests a foot on the wheel anyway just for a sense of control. The other foot is for goosing throttles.

I have to say I puzzled over the profile of the owners of Black Pearl. That’s a new one on the list. I thought, “Oh, this is your financially-secure skipper with inherited wealth and a high-fashion trophy wife. But then somebody pointed out that the hit movies in the “Pirates of the Caribbean” series are all about a fictional pirate galleon called the Black Pearl. Oh my, this changes everything.

Vic’s opinion is the owner of Black Pearl is, in fact, a lawyer who files class action lawsuits during the week. But I think Black Pearl’s skipper plays strictly by the rules Monday through Friday, goes to church every Sunday, and turns into a pretend-to-be swashbuckler only on certain Saturdays.

This is all in fun. The new top ten names suggest to me that in real life these owners are all solid, taxpaying citizens who just like to escape the world’s madness once in a while and who can fault them for that?

Naut me. Sea ya.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Cruising with Kids. Yes!

2006-07-01T08:08:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
CRUISING WITH KIDS. YES!
By Barb Hansen
April 2, 2002 * Repeated July, 2006

Child psychologists say we should spend quality time with our children and grandchildren. I agree with the experts. Furthermore, I cannot think of any time that has more built-in quality than the time you can spend with a child on a boat cruise.

I don't mean the kind of cruise you take on a cruise ship. I mean a cruise on a vessel with two, maybe three cabins and a small galley. Almost by definition a cruise on this vessel will mean you will spend quality time with the young ones onboard. (Nobody can escape to the casino or to the game room.) We tell our charter customers that a cruise with young ones is a memory-building opportunity as well as a character-building opportunity for them and for the kids.

When a pod of dolphins selects your bow wave to ride, and your young charges get to watch this magnificent animal from just a few feet away, the thrilling memory will stay with them (and you) a very long time.

Multiply this thrill by all of the close-to-nature things they will see and do. Then, imagine how much better this vacation can be compared to previous vacations that always seemed to involve an expensive attraction with high-priced junk food and mechanical and stage drop imitations of nature's magnificence.

Vic and I have some experience here -- with the boats and with the kids. Every year we cruise for a week or more with a brother, a sister-in-law, a dog, and three nieces, ages 8, 10, and 12.

We have learned that the best cruises are those with "to do" lists that follow a pretty regular schedule every day. This heads off all manner of unpleasantness. "Are we there yet," is one of the milder complaints.

We're fortunate, because cruising through our tropical island paradise offers so much, as you'll infer from the items on the list we use to keep young ones happy, occupied and, by the end of the day, pleasantly exhausted. Here are the activities we draw on for our daily schedules:
· Dolphin watching. We set up "watches' on the bow.

· Exploring. We launch the dinghy and motor or paddle in to a deserted beach so everyone can look for special shells and other treasures.

· Swimming. A swim in the surf is terrific fun but we also try to arrange a swim in the pool at a marina where, conveniently, all aboard can shower afterwards with plenty of fresh water.

· Fishing. A piece of shrimp on a little hook does the job almost every time in our area. Fishing is a great activity to schedule before dinner. The young anglers might catch something fresh for the grill. By the way, bring lots of good food and interesting snacks but avoid the kinds that produce a sugar-rush, if you catch my drift.

· Reading. We encourage this after lunch and, if a nap should happen, that's just fine. When you're underway, the rumble of the engine almost guarantees sleep. After dinner, we often read pirate stories.

· Star gazing. Away from the city lights, the stars put on a show better than any planetarium. Bone up on some astronomical factoids so you can help the young ones understand what they're looking at. Or, challenge each of them to teach the rest about a star, planet or constellation. A cruise planned around a full moon is a special treat.

· Letter writing. In this era of cell phones and email, a personal letter home or to a friend becomes something really special for the recipient. Encourage this before it becomes a lost art. On Useppa Island, one of our favorite stops, kids can visit "Mister T the Tortoise" and drop off a letter in his mailbox. The best part is, he writes back.

· Story writing. Do teachers still ask for a what-I-did-on-my-summer-vacation essay? Even if they do not, bring paper and pens and assign it anyway, allowing a little time for this toward the end of each day. Be sure to have them include drawings to accompany their stories.

Cruising with kids makes for a special cruise. It brings out the "kid' in all of us.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Hurricane Marketing

2006-06-01T08:05:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
Hurricane Marketing
By Barb Hansen
June 1, 2006

How come the TV news people always warn us of the coming hurricane season but you never hear them announce the dreadful approach of the tornado season or the coming season of thunderstorms and flooding? What makes hurricane season so “special?

As I write this it is flooding big time in the northeast. Massachusetts got 18 inches of rain in two days and it is still raining there. I don’t recall the Weather Channel bombarding us with warnings that the rain and flood season was about to chase thousands from their homes.

Last month nearly a dozen people died in tornadoes in Tennessee. I don’t remember the doom and gloom cable news report that the twister season was coming and that experts were predicting four F5 tornadoes this year.

But when the subject is hurricanes, the bad news bears at the networks get really excited. They say it’s going to be bad; it’s going to be really, really bad. And then they show us the video of a really bad hurricane but – have you noticed this? – it’s the same hurricane video they showed us last year and the year before that.

I feel badly for the people in Massachusetts and Tennessee and all the other places that deal with floods and tornadoes. But they live where they live and they all know that their regions have certain weather patterns at certain times of the year. They just deal with it.

Just about everybody has to deal with some season of rotten weather. Mother Nature is going to be predictably angry at some time of the year no matter where you live. In some places, she is going to be really angry. Earthquakes and mudslides come to California. Tornadoes rip across the country from Texas to Indiana. Blizzards and ice storms bring towns from Minneapolis to Macon to a standstill. But we usually don’t hear about these “serious weather events” until after they happen and only if they have video to show us.

Yet, for some reason, hurricanes get special TV attention before the season. Hurricanes are just two months away. Hurricanes are just one month away. They’re almost here. You’re going to die.

When a hurricane is threatening Florida TV news shows us a satellite picture of a huge, rotating cloud covering the entire state of Florida and they would gladly have us believe that the entire state was about to be destroyed. But when they send their big time anchor-person into the path of the hurricane for eyewitness reports, they usually have trouble making the weather look as bad as they want it to look. (Full disclosure. I am so glad Dan Rather retired.)

Call me a cynic but what networks are trying to do is motivate us to stay right where we are and stay tuned. It’s a way to promote the channel and call it news. Fear sells, of course. It’s one of the most powerful motivators, right up there with greed, love and belonging. Be afraid. Don’t leave the house. Leave that dial right where it is.

Floridians know when the satellite photo shows a cloud over Florida that under 98 percent of that cloud everyday life goes on as normal.

The good news is, that big, rotating cloud has a nice silver lining: Low hotel rates, low rates at the attractions, low yacht charter rates. The "low season" is a welcome incentive for Floridians and others to travel about the state to see the sights, visit the attractions, and go cruising, fishing and sailing. Yep, hurricane season really is special.

Rather than getting spooked by the televised fortune tellers of fear, information age travelers know to log on to credible Internet weather sites to see for themselves the real-time satellite and radar images of storms and storm tracks.

Know this: in the absence of official warnings from the National Hurricane Center you can come to Florida during the bargain season with the rational assurance that the sky is not going to fall while you are here.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Luckiest People in the World

2006-05-01T08:03:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
Luckiest People in the World
By Barb Hansen
May 1, 2006

Barbra Streisand sang that people who need people are the luckiest people in the world. Vic and I could sing that tune with different lyrics. The luckiest people in the world are small business owners like ourselves with great staffers who share our labor of love.

How lucky can you be? If you’re lucky like Vic and me, you are twice-lucky because then your well-oiled business machine is also located at the water’s edge and you’re working around boats. Best of all, in our case, is the fact that we’re working alongside terrific people who help our customers plan cruises and take learn-to-yacht courses.

Our employees seem genuinely to like and respect each other for their respective talents. Nobody has an attitude. They work as a team. If one is out, another takes up the slack. If one needs help, another lends a hand. Management gurus call this redundancy. Whatever it is, it is truly the lubricant that oils the gears of all smooth running enterprises. Ours, for sure.

For this, especially, we salute Marc Winkel, our anchor, who has been with us almost 19 years, and our chief captain, Gary Graham, with 15 years of teaching students how to operate a yacht. They set the standards by good example.

Here, standard one is making customers happy. If charters or students arrive after hours after a long day of travel the boat is ready for them with a light on and the refrigerator chilled. Our dock manager doesn’t just hand over the boat keys and announce, “Here it is.” He spends at least a couple of hours helping charters learn all about the vessel and answering all their questions.

I'm always proud when a person calling on Saturday or Sunday says in a surprised tone, "Oh, you are there on the weekends?" Yep. For 22 years’ worth of weekends callers have been treated to a real, live, friendly voice on the other end of the line.

Vic and I just returned from a mini-vacation and, alas, noted more than a few hospitality staffers with an “I don’t really care” attitude. This is so common that when you run into a friendly employee it just about knocks you over.
Vic and I will celebrate anniversary number 22 this year (marriage and business). I think we were in an oh-what-the-heck frame of mind back in 1984. The cold war was intense and there was talk of a nuclear standoff. The prime loan rate was exhorbitant, 13 percent. Oh, what the heck, one Midwesterner said to another, let’s get married, move to Florida, and buy a yacht chartering company. And we’re glad we did.

There’s an expression that I like. “Get a job you enjoy and you’ll never have to work again.” Now, “work” is in the mind of the doer but I have to say Vic and I enjoy our work. I can look out the window 12 months of the year and see blue water and boats and people enjoying both. When our clients are happy and excited, I’m happy and excited for them.

We let our customers grade us. Most write how great our staff is, quite often adding, “Give him a raise!” So noted.

Our customers probably see Vic and me as the faces of the business but I’m here to tell one and all that it’s our employees who deserve all the credit for making it work, for making our work so much fun, and for keeping our customers happy.

We are so grateful.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Retirement "Float" Planning

2006-04-01T08:00:00.000-08:00

View From the Marina
Retirement “Float” Planning is Fun
By Barb Hansen
April 1, 2006

Rich and Suzy Koths of Michigan have discovered that retirement planning isn’t as dry and boring as it sounds. In fact, it can be terrific fun.

Still “nine years and nine months” away from retirement (and obviously counting) the GM engineer and his wife Suzy are fondly picturing the day when, free at last, they will spend summers cruising the Great Lakes and winters exploring Florida’s Gulf Coast aboard the yacht they are now purchasing with other people’s money.

I met the Koths (pronounced “Coats”) in the winter of 2002 when they came down to Florida and chartered one of our power yachts in paradise. Paradise, as you may know, is cruising Southwest Florida’s placid channel behind exotic Gulf barrier islands like Sanibel, Pine, Captiva, Cayo Costa, Gasparilla, Cabbage Key and Useppa.

Rich and Suzy enjoyed their charter cruise so much they asked us for more details about what Vic and I call the “Floating Retirement Plan.” This is the plan in a nutshell: Buy a sail or power yacht, new or used. Put it to work for you as a charter boat. Chartering revenue helps pay for the boat and upkeep.

The Koths purchased a Jefferson 42 Viscount with huge cabins fore and aft, two baths, salon, dinette, wet bar, heat and air conditioning. It has everything except a Home Sweet Home sign. They put excess chartering revenue they earn back into their boat – appropriately named Final Sea-Lection -- buying new electronics and other nest-feathering upgrades.

The Koths escape snow country and cruise about three times a year on their winter home away from home. They like it that Final Sea-Lection stays busy with charters and is looked after carefully by our maintenance crew. It gives them confidence that all systems are go when they take a little vacation time and fly down from Michigan for a cruise on their boat.

Golly, the way real home prices are going up, it’s a wonder more people who want the best of both worlds – summer up north, winter down south -- don’t consider a floating home. Each year new boats cost a little more than the year before but home prices are zooming up beyond --dare I say it -- reason.

Rich and Suzy’s winter home is one of the most popular vessels in our charter fleet here at Marinatown Marina. In fact, the chartering business is very good. That sound you heard was me, the proprietor of a certain yacht chartering enterprise, crying for more boats to charter. The law of supply and demand is a good law except sometimes it doesn’t feel so good to the buyer or the seller.

In fact, I’m actively looking for more people like the Koths who long for the day when they can retire and actually have time – and a vessel – to sail into the sunset. Meanwhile, Vic and I will put their boat to work earning money to keep the dream alive. The way I figure it, life is only as good as you make it.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: The New Summer Camp

2006-03-01T07:58:00.000-08:00

View from the Marina
The New Summer Camp
By Barb Hansen
March 1, 2006

One of my fond memories is two summer weeks as a pre-teen at Camp Gallahue Valley in Southern Indiana. I recall it fondly now but at the time I think I complained to my long-suffering parents about icky insects, latrines, cold lake water we were forced to swim in, and horseback riding in the heat of the day. Life is so hard when you’re a girl of a certain age.

I was homesick, most of all. I could not let them know this.

Yet even after all these years I can still see the campfires, hear the songs, see the faces of my new friends, and recall my excitement when the camp leader called my name to pick up a letter or a box from home with cookies-to-share. Summer camp – I know this now – taught me a lot of new things, gave me more confidence, helped me get along with lots of different people, and helped make me a better adult.

I confess that all of this was on my mind when the staff and I at Florida Sailing & Cruising School drew up plans for a new summer boating camp here at Marinatown Marina in N. Fort Myers for boys and girls from ages 10-15.

We call it Camp AHOY! It’s a week-long day program emphasizing boating safety and an appreciation for nature and the marine environment. Each five-day camp session begins on a Monday in July and concludes on the following Friday. Five day-campers will be assigned to each vessel, a 32-foot trawler-style cruiser. Their “camp counselor” will be a U.S. Coast Guard licensed marine captain and boating instructor.

They’ll learn about the vessel and what makes it tick. They’ll pick up some proper boating terminology, tie some knots, learn about tides, make calls on the marine radio, learn emergency procedures, get a lesson in chart reading and maybe get to steer the boat in the channel. These campers are going to learn some things their parents don’t know and for some I’m sure that will be a terrific highlight for the week. They won’t get to sing around a campfire, or short-sheet cabin mates, but I’m sure they’ll think of something just as hilarious.

They might get to see how a real live fire boat works or observe a lock tender as he assists the vessel in locking-through along the Okeechobee Waterway. The emphasis is on safety so instead of ghost stories round the campfire, the captain may tell some boating accident horror stories up on the flybridge.

I want students to learn to appreciate the marine environment and the birds and wildlife that depend on it. When their vessel leaves its slip each morning and cruises down the Caloosahatchee River the captain might point to a bird and ask the students to identify it. No, it’s not a heron, he will say. It’s a great blue heron. Or he’ll say that’s not an egret; it’s a snowy egret.

Learning to appreciate and respect our beautiful tropical world can’t start early enough in a young person’s life.

In the hindsight of a camper with some years behind her, I believe what makes youth camps work is fun mixed with lighthearted discipline. Like the roux in a good seafood gumbo, this helps the other lessons go down well. Without them being aware of it, young adults-to-be learn how to follow directions and how to give directions. They learn teamwork. They learn how to direct and motivate others. These are the stock-in-trade skills of a good boating captain and crew. In fact, they are the basic skills for a productive and happy adult life. Boating just happens to be one of the best ways to teach it.

Camp AHOY! will be everything Camp Gallahue Valley was, even more, but without icky insects, latrines, cold swimming water. A box lunch is provided. Hey, maybe we’ll even pack some “s’mores” in the box lunch. That will make this camper smile and keep the tradition alive for a new generation of summer campers.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Dream On. Really.

2006-02-01T07:57:00.000-08:00

View from the Marina
Dream on. Really.
By Barb Hansen
February 1, 2006

Isn’t it funny how you can be on top of the world one day and as low as low can go the next? Actually, in real life it’s not so funny.

Late in 2004 Dave Jossi came to our offices at Southwest Florida Yachts and told me his story.

In 1997, he was on top of the world. Not only did he have a great job with a fast-paced, high-stress (and top-dollar) firm in Washington, DC, he also played as hard as he worked. He rode horses, raced down ski slopes, dove on reefs and wrecks, hopped mountain bikes down rocky trails. You get the picture.

Although not a boater, Dave was interested in boating. “I really wanted our family to get involved in boating but my wife was opposed from the beginning. Every time the subject was raised she would laugh and say that it would never work since, she claimed, she got seasick walking across a wet lawn.”

That summer, however, Dave’s life changed forever. In mid-July, he came down with what seemed to be a bad case of the flu. But he also noticed a rash on the back of his leg. Not one but two physicians assured him that it was caused by a simple spider bite.

A month later, in Houston on business, he awoke and realized that the left side of his face was paralyzed. Worried he might end up hospitalized far from home, Dave took the next flight to Washington. Now the diagnosis was Bell’s Palsy.

His condition continued to deteriorate. He began experiencing excruciating back pain and double vision. This time Dave’s physician accurately diagnosed his condition as a severe case of Lyme disease and put him in the hospital. Tests showed that the disease had spread to his central nervous system.

Industrial strength IV antibiotics helped alleviate the worst of his symptoms but his struggle really had just begun. With unrelenting back pain and severe fatigue Dave found the demands of the job he once found so challenging to now be overwhelming. Determined not to give up without a struggle, however, he hung on for an entire year before it became obvious to everyone, even himself, that he simply wasn’t up to the task.

Once on disability Dave focused all his remaining energy on finding physicians who he hoped might resolve his mounting physical problems. His initial efforts led to an expert in pain management who was able to bring the excruciating pain in his spine under control using an intrathecal pump. Implanted in the abdomen, the pump supplies a steady and strong stream of pain medication to the base of his spine.

He continued to seek medical help for his condition. Expert after expert told him that his symptoms were beyond their experience and that there was little they could do for him. He did his very best to maintain a positive attitude despite these setbacks until the truly crushing blow came. His wife of 28-years announced that she was “running away from home at age 47.” She could no longer handle the pressure of watching him deteriorate day after day.

His life collapsing around him, Dave was desperate to find something positive to help him regain some sense of hope. That was when the dream of owning a boat came back to him.

Despite being bed-ridden for long periods, Dave had no problem learning more about boating through books, magazines and the Internet. He discovered our website and set up an appointment.

When he visited, Dave told me about his boating dream. I explained he would need to gain practical experience through courses, boat clubs, chartering or purchasing a small, easily-managed boat. With that base of knowledge plus a firm idea of what he wanted, it would be time to seek the services of a broker to help him find the right boat.

First things first. In December, 2004 Dave completed two back to back courses, a six-day liveaboard session with our Captain Greg Corsones, Powerboat 101 and Powerboat 102 at Florida Sailing & Cruising School. Through the course Dave got practical docking, handling and cruising experience. He loved it and he was a star. His dream was transforming to reality.

My star student visited us again late in 2005. He was even more hooked on boating than before and we talked about taking his boating dream to the next step.

There’s more to Dave’s story, and his boating dream, which we’ll bring to you in another View from the Marina column. Will he stay hooked on boating? Will he buy a boat? Stay tuned.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Dog and Boat Personalities

2006-01-03T07:55:00.000-08:00

View from the Marina
Dog and Boat Personalities
By Barb Hansen
January 3, 2006

The way I figure it all dogs on God’s blue water planet are hard-wired to go boating. After all, are they not descended from the original pair that survived the flood aboard Noah’s Ark?

We’ve read about how dogs act and even look like their owners, but have you noticed that dogs also tend to have the same personalities as their boats?

It is so. Star, our Border Collie, is a trawler dog. Trawler dogs are basically working dogs. I’d put retrievers in the trawler category, too. I’ve heard about retrievers who happily jump into the water on command and swim after something or other that has blown off the deck. To earn her sleep and dish of food, Star patrols the perimeter of the vessel to make sure enemies (like gulls, pelicans and egrets) don’t land without permission. Like her vessel she is kind and reliable.

I can’t begin to picture Star on a sleek Italian-styled motor-yacht. On that billionaire’s vessel you’re more likely to find a fluffy animal the exact colors of the plush carpeting. Like her keeper, she doesn’t work. She just tries to look sleek and pretty, haughty even, and be available for petting. Dogs and cats in this category include the Bichon Frise, Yorkie, Chihuahua, Lhasa Apso, Miniature Poodle and Pekinese.

Sailboat dogs, like their vessels, are practical types who like the wind in their faces and can take just about whatever nature dishes out. One of the best pets for a sailboat I’ve heard is a short, sturdy mutt who, like its vessel, just “goes with the flow.” Smaller dogs seem to be better suited to navigate an angled deck and don’t get whacked by a swinging boom. Your sailboat dog is small enough to fit into a canvas bag so the skipper can transport him on the handlebars of a folding bicycle.

I vote for the Labrador Retriever as the perfect kayak and canoe dog. If the vessel tips over, this dog with the webbed paws is in his element. The only problem is, at roughly 70-80 lbs, this canine and handler may occupy too much volume for a paddleboat at any one time.

For commercial fishing vessels there are Newfoundlands and Portuguese Water Dogs. They have the same rugged look and low freeboards as the fishing hulls they work on. They do the same work, too, pulling fish nets, towing small boats, and retrieving fish and fowl.

I read that the winner of the Tulsa World photo contest shot a picture of a dog steering a speedboat. They didn’t say what kind of dog it was but I’m guessing it was a sleek collie with big, white teeth and long hair and drool blowing in the wind. He’s the designated driver. The owner, presumably, was in the passenger seat sipping a beverage.

Do you have a nomination for the best personal watercraft dog? Browsing the Internet I read about a young couple that takes their 11-pound Pomeranian jet skiing. Yes, it must be the Pomeranian. As boats and dogs go, it is small. And, like the personal watercraft, if you ask me, it is a restless, noisy toy.

Now in the brave new world in which we live, selective dog breeding is creating new boating animals such as the Goldendoodle and Labradoodle. The breeders say they love the water and have the retriever work ethic but also are non-shedding and allergy-friendly like the poodle. What would Noah think?

Now, perfect boat dogs are able to take bathroom breaks on deck so the owners don’t have to take them to shore in a dinghy. Hear that, Star?

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: The Art of the Gift

2005-12-01T07:53:00.000-08:00

View from the Marina
The Art of the Gift
By Barb Hansen
December 1, 2005

The most overworked word in the gift-giving season is the word “perfect.” Browse holiday gift ideas on the Web and you get hundreds of familiar clichés like:

· “Holidays are a perfect time to introduce the men in your life to___” (Just fill in the blank with a different for-males product.)

· “The Holiday Survival Kit makes the perfect holiday gift for college students.” (What we really need is a Holiday Survival Kit for the parents of college students.)

· “Holiday Gift Guide helps shoppers find the perfect gift for everyone.” (Something tells me we won’t find anyone’s perfect gift here)

What makes a gift perfect? This is hard, right up there with what is the meaning of life. Selecting the perfect gift comes close to being an art form. It can’t be a mechanical thing like pushing NORMAL or even CHINA-CRYSTAL on the dishwasher. The perfect gift might jump out at you from a store shelf but it really won’t be perfect unless it says something about him or her and something about you, too.

First, of course, the perfect gift must reflect the relationship in an accurate way. You don’t give something personal to a casual acquaintance. That is, it has to be appropriate for the relationship.

Second, I think we agree that the perfect gift is something the other person will enjoy. I know somebody who gave a complicated 3D jigsaw puzzle to an aging aunt whose mental faculties were waning. That was not your perfect gift.

Third, the best gift will say something about who you are. I heard about an engaged-to-be-married young woman who gave her boyfriend a guided sportfishing trip for two. Though not an angler herself, she wanted her future husband to know she supported his passion. The young man asked her to join him on the fishing trip and she did, and that was another gift. It told him she might even become an angler, too.

Giving of your time seems to be a factor in a lot of good gifts. I’ve long admired the “Take Me Fishing” ad campaign by the Recreational Boating & Fishing Foundation. Those ads are powerful because, in a flash, we remember that adults took time out of their lives to share their boating or fishing passion with us when we were children. They motivate us to do the same for the next generations.

Sharing your passion is good, too. We have some friends who gave their son a boat ride as a birthday present. He invited three of his classmates including a couple who would not have had that opportunity. It seems like there are a lot of families now without a dad and it was the dad, in days gone by, who took the child fishing or boating.

When you can’t invest your own time, it’s okay to give something that doubles their pleasure when they do go out in the boat. I note, for example, that this year West Marine is promoting wireless weather forecasters, waterproof MP3 players and underwater cameras.

You can give a boating gift that can be enjoyed from the comfort of home, say a boating calendar, a trip planner or a gift certificate for a boating course.

How about a book? One of my favorite boating books is Richard Bode’s classic, First You Have to Row a Little Boat. Bode writes about what he learned as a little boy from sailing and how those lessons helped him navigate life.

Like one’s first bike, a first boat is the gift that really delights. For the gunna-be, wanna-be boater in your family or extended family, you could make it happen with the gift of a canoe, a kayak or perhaps a little skiff.

It’s not easy to find the perfect gift. After all, the heart and the brain are at work here. You’ve got to know something about the other person. You’ve got to know something about yourself. Most importantly, perhaps, you’ve got to know something about the both of you.

You won’t know right away if you’ve given somebody the perfect gift. But if over time that person remembers it--let’s just say it was the gift of boating--and still treasures it after many years, then you’ll know. That’s the gift that keeps on giving. Times two. That’s perfect.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Birds of a Feather

2005-11-01T07:51:00.000-08:00

View from the Marina
Birds of a Feather
By Barb Hansen
November 1, 2005

The other day I watched some warblers twit about the shrubbery and I was reminded of an enduring scientific certainty: We are animals. I mean that in a nice way, of course.

It’s easy to forget this while sipping merlot and emailing friends, but it’s true. Ask anybody. We belong to the kingdom of animalia, the order of primates, the genus of homo, the species of sapiens, the advanced species of wine lovers and the super-duper family of sailors. (The last two are just theories at this point. Mine, actually.)

I also believe that like warblers we humans are hard-wired to do certain things like, for example, migrate to Florida during the winter months. However, because we have advanced brains and central heat, many in the kingdom of animalia ignore those signals. And that is such a shame, because those who live in cold climates could be having so much fun outside in the sunshine and stay warm, too. Not listening to those health signals, I suspect, is one of the primary causes of the growing pandemic that the researchers call Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD).

Warblers are hard-wired to fly to Southwest Florida in September and depart for Central America in November. We’ll miss them, of course, but it’s okay because they are listening to their inner selves and doing what they are supposed to do. Anyway, more snowbirds are on the way. Flocks of white pelicans from Canada will soon be floating in sheltered coves, diving on thick schools of minnows and taking graceful winged exercise together. Belted kingfishers will whistle and zoom through mangrove passages. Here and there a loon from the land of frozen lakes (Midwest and Canada) will pop to the surface with a fish wiggling in its beak. Our resident bald eagles and hawks always invite their cousins to visit from up north and they all come.

None of these snowbirds to the best of modern scientific knowledge suffers from SAD. Nor is there a documented case of SAD among our permanent populations of herons, ibises, egrets, willets and bitterns. All of these happy creatures are on display in the winter months to watchful sailors. Vic and I especially like to cruise the skinny backbay waters of Pine Island Sound because we can observe so many birds doing what their instincts tell them to do.

As scientific observers of the barrier islands of biodiversity at certain times of the year we hypothesize that we are also obeying silent neural instructions up to and including the part when we put the cork back into the tall, brown bottle with the dark red fluid. When summer returns to Florida each year Vic and I, still obeying said neural system signals, break open the chardonnay and migrate to cooler climes to visit relatives in New York City, Vermont, Indiana and other points north.

As a young history student in Indiana I remember learning about and feeling so sorry for the native Americans of the upper Midwest who had to try to stay warm through those brutal winters wearing only those meager garments. But I later learned they didn’t stay there in the winter. They went south, following the sun, eating fresh fish and going where the weather suited their clothes. They were the original Florida snowbirds of the homo sapiens persuasion.

Vic and I and the visitor’s bureau warmly invite you and yours to do what warblers, ruby throated hummingbirds and all birds of a certain feather do enthusiastically when the temperature drops -- vacation in Florida.

People, listen to your inner selves. The heating bills that arrive at your home this fall and winter will remind you of that.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Self-Sufficiency is a Virtue

2005-10-01T07:45:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
Self-Sufficiency is a Virtue
By Barb Hansen
October 3, 2005

For all our faults we boaters are self-sufficient people. We plan. We practice. Before a trip we check everything from fuses to foghorns, charts to chocks. Tanks are topped off. Spares are secured. For a weekend cruise we stock the fridge for a fortnight.

This is fun, actually. Planning the cruise is part of the cruise. See, virtue really is its own reward.
Pre-cruise we tune the TV to The Weather Channel. We check real-time satellite images. If a tropical storm or worse is a possibility, we call off the cruise.

Certainly, the human survival instinct motivates us. Boaters know how quickly the sea gets angry and becomes life threatening. We’ve read about others who died at sea or survived, barely. So, we prepare. We play what-if games. Better safe than sorry is more than a cliché.

And there is this. No boater wants the embarrassment of being rescued by another vessel or, God forbid, the Coast Guard. Chastened, that skipper imagines what other boaters might be saying back at the dock, mean things like, “He just ran out of gas; is that pitiful or what?” Or, “You won’t believe this, but they were using an old chart.”

To a vessel operator, embarrassment of that sort may not be a fate worse than death, but it’s right up there.

Another current of thought – you could put it at the core of the boating belief system – is the ideal of freedom. We are free to sail where and when we want. But we also accept the corresponding responsibility. If others are willing to rescue us when we’re in trouble, we ought to try hard not to get into trouble in the first place.

It seems like every hurricane season we have a case where thousands who should and could have evacuated, did not. They probably told themselves, Hey, we haven’t had a storm here since forever. It won’t hit us. They never do. That rationale reminds me of the Steven Wright line: “I plan to live forever. So far, so good.”

Well, if just a few individuals get into trouble the police or fire departments may come to their rescue. But when thousands get into trouble it seems to me some should have made other plans.
Super hurricanes like Katrina and Rita remind us that there is a fine and fragile line that separates our comfortable lives from hardship or death. Good planning helps us boaters stay on the bright side of that line.
PS to readers: If you have not already donated to the relief effort, we hope you will. You never know when the tide will turn and you and your family might need help. Barb Hansen

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: A 9/11 Salute to Boating's Heroes

2005-09-01T13:55:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
A 9/11 SALUTE TO BOATING’S HEROES
By Barb Hansen
September 1, 2005

On September 11, Vic and I will join America's freedom-loving people and salute the heroes of 9/11 -- the World Trade Center innocents, the firemen, policemen and EMT's, and the airline passengers who rushed the terrorist and lost their lives to prevent the plane from flying into the White House.

In fact, we'll salute a few of my own heroes, all year long stars who make a boater's life worth living.

Coast Guard officers and all of the men and women who enforce the laws. Thank you.

Dockmasters who always seem to find a place for us to stay, and energetic, enthusiastic young men and women who take our lines and help us tie up at the marina.

Bridge tenders on the Gulf ICW who manage to keep traffic flowing with rush hour vehicles hoping to get over the bridges and rush hour vessels hoping to get under them.

Boat and engine repair specialists who could probably make a lot more money fixing cars or building houses, but prefer working on boats.

All the good people who volunteer for the Coast Guard Auxiliary safety patrols and inspections.

Sales pros at the local boat store who know what they sell and what's best for your boat.

Professional ship and tanker captains who bring us all the food and supplies we take for granted every day.

All the people, young and not so young, who spend a day every year cleaning our beaches of society's castaways – bits of Styrofoam, tires, disposable cigarette lighters, cigarette butts, and assorted other marks of "civilization."

These are the people who make it possible for us to go boating. We have places to go and when we need help, somebody is always willing to help.

We'll salute all the waterfront restaurants and watering holes and the people who work there, our brothers and sisters in the workaday world of boating. Especially we'll be thinking of the fun times we've had at Barnacle Phil's, accessible only by boat on North Captiva Island, Marker 52 just south of Captiva Pass on the Gulf ICW.

Before 9/11, the walls and ceiling of Barnacle Phil's were covered entirely by George Washingtons. Customers have been autographing and stapling these bills to the walls since the popular bistro opened in 1984. A few weeks after 9/11, the walls became bare. The owners, with help from local firemen, took all the bills down. The firemen pulled staples for five hours. Job done, they counted out piles of dollar bills totaling $9,750. Oh, what the heck, let's make it $10,000 even, the firemen said, and threw in cash from their own billfolds. Customers wrote a few checks, too. They sent the money to New York for the families of the fire, police and EMT personnel who died trying to save people in the World Trade Center.

Here's the rest of the story. Primed by generous contributions from the billfolds of the Captiva Island firemen, the walls of Barnacle Phil's were soon redecorated once more by new dollar bills from customers.

Boaters and the people who serve them make me proud to be a citizen. When the call for help goes out, boaters respond. That's a good thing, because we in the Florida boating community have now been asked to respond to a special call for help from our government leaders.

Coast Guard spokesmen recently acknowledged that terrorists may try to bring in vessels laden with explosives or even a radioactive device. I understand the Coast Guard is already checking ship cargoes before they enter the major harbors. But what about the thousands of smaller vessels that use the waterways? The Coast Guard can't check them all.

That’s why we support the Coast Guard’s recently announced program called Operation On Guard, which asks Florida’s boater’s to monitor and report suspicious behavior. Monitor and report, but don’t try to take action on your own.

Operation On Guard has been compared to the World War II program asking civilians to watch the coastline for German U-boats. This is a call for good citizenship, not heroism, an opportunity for us to repay the land and the water we love so much.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: TV's Hurricane Coverage

2005-08-01T13:53:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
TV’s Hurricane “Coverage”
By Barb Hansen
August 1, 2005

Hurricanes are deadly serious. And, for the most part, television weather coverage does a commendable job of letting us know where and when to expect the big winds and waves. So why does so much of TV’s hurricane coverage make us want to laugh?

Vic and I have been especially suspicious of TV’s hurricane coverage ever since Dan Rather reported on Hurricane Andrew from the wrong coast. While Florida’s East Coast was getting blasted, Dan positioned himself in beautiful weather on the West Coast and told people how bad it was going to get. But it never did. The damage was confined to the Miami-Homestead area.

The Weather Channel’s motto is “Live by it.” But often it seems that what they really want us to do is live in fear by it. Fear sells. Fear keeps you at home in front of the TV set. TV news’ mantra is if it bleeds, it leads. So, bleeding or not, they want you to think wolves are at the doorstep.

Be afraid, they say. Be very afraid. We could all be killed. But don’t panic. TV’s problem is that the placid waves and light winds shown on the TV screen don’t match the antics and false alarms sounded by their reporters. Don’t they realize people out there in TV land are chuckling?

I applaud the new TV newsroom technologies that show precisely where the winds and rain are heaviest, right down to the neighborhood. I like it when they list the shelters open, schools closed, and things to buy and things to do. But when they send their crews on the road, all the channels become the comedy channel. Even Jay Leno cracks jokes about it.

To honor the best performances, I recently founded the Academy of Boob Tube Hurricane Coverage. Nominations for the 2005 awards are now open.

Best actor in a leading role. My nomination goes to the national cable anchor reporting on Hurricane Emily from the Florida Panhandle for the best ad lib. …That was intense. Ohmigod, the aluminum sign is blowing this way. No, it’s going the other way. Watch out, watch out, we could all be killed. Somebody should get that sign under control before it kills me.

Best screenplay. Here we had "team coverage" where one reporter screen-played in a parking lot during a light rain. He ran from puddle to puddle saying, "you can see the water beginning to pool here.” Another time I saw a reporter standing on the beach, pants rolled up, the waves less than a foot high saying, "the waves appear to be building."

Best costuming. This year all the nominations are for 20-something-year-old blonde female reporters wearing lots of makeup and fashionable expense-account rain slickers…but no rain hat.

Best visual effects. A morning talk show weather personality stood on a Panhandle beach reporting on a TV video truck laying on its side. I thought TV was supposed to cover the news, not make it.

Best foreign language program. Have you noticed that it is no longer good enough to call it a hurricane. Now, it’s a “hurricane event.” And, the hurricane is not going to affect this or that area, it is going to “impact” it. The Weather Channel tells us where “impacts” will be felt.

Best unoriginal script. Vic and I listen for clichés and we are never disappointed. Batten down the hatches. Hunker down. It’s raining cats and dogs, folks. It’s just a matter of time. Packing horrific winds. Making landfall. Path of destruction. Area of combat. We give each other a there-they-go-again smile.

I’d give a real award to somebody for the television technologies that give us early warnings and dramatic real time radar and satellite pictures. There’s no need for the reporters to stage or exaggerate the news. Timely on location reports speak for themselves.

Hurricanes are serious. Unfortunately, most TV coverage from the scene is just plain frivolous.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Tombstones for Busy People

2005-07-01T13:51:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
Tombstones for Busy People
By Barb Hansen
July 1, 2005

This nation has a big problem. I call it The Big O.

No, not obesity. Overscheduling.

Simon and Garfunkel diagnosed this ailment years ago with their Feeling Groovy song.

Slow down, you move too fast. You’ve got to make the morning last. Just kicking down the cobble stones, lookin’ for fun and feelin’ groovy.

The problem was clearly evident 40 years ago when that song was popular. It’s much worse now. We try to do too much in not enough time. To get more done we even cut back on sleep. I read that 100 years ago Americans averaged 9.5 hours of sleep a night. Today, we average 7 hours and many “get by” on much less than that.

Why do we do this to ourselves? We do it, psychologists tell us, because it makes us feel important. We are sending a message to others. "I’m 24/7, man. Notice how busy I am? I am really important."

Now we don’t even do just one thing at a time. We multi-task. We carry on a phone conversation while typing an email message and also keeping an ear cocked for breaking news on the cable channel. Even the TV channel is multi-tasking. There’s a split screen showing two things going on at once, plus an audio track, plus text of news bits crawling across the bottom of the screen.

But it gets worse. Some too-busy people overschedule their vacations, too. As the chief cook and concierge at a certain yacht chartering firm, I have seen The Big O disease reach problematical proportions. Power cruisers are the worst. They are more point A to point B types. Crank up the RPMs, get me to the marina on time, and all that. Sailors are much more patient. They know you can’t depend on the wind and while they don’t mind starting the auxiliary from time to time, they’d really rather be sailing with no particular place to go. Thanks Chuck Berry

I won’t name names but we had a customer, an accomplished boater, who was qualified to skipper one of our trawlers without a captain. He’s a fast-charging, get ‘er done, check-it-off kind of guy. He arrived four hours late and missed his appointment to get checked out on the boat and was miffed nobody would stay late to do it. After his check out the next morning, anxious to get back on his self-imposed schedule, he pulled the vessel out of the slip and navigated right into the teeth of a heavy rain storm.

The best prescription I know for The Big O is cruising. Your hometown paper is not delivered to the aft deck. Cell phones don’t always get a signal. The TV screen is small; reception is poor. If you don't get the message, you're listening too hard. Tap, tap, Mr. and Mrs. Chronic Busy. You. Turn off the phone and the TV. Pick up a novel instead of a newspaper. Close your eyelids and drift into a delicious nap. Get that groovy feeling again. Just last week a charter client asked if they could take the TV off the boat for their cruise. That’s the idea.

There is another way out, not so groovy, not so inviting. It’s called The Big Sleep. It’s very popular among The Big O set and if you are one of those overscheduled types you are most welcome to engrave one of these sayings on your tombstone for use at the appointed time, fast approaching.

Notice how important I am.

I've got so much to do.

Or (with apologies to Emily Dickinson) this paraphrase of one of her famous poems:

Because I would not stop for Life-- He kindly stopped for me--

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: The Family Vacation

2005-06-01T13:39:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
The Family Vacation
By Barb Hansen
June 1, 2005

Summer’s here and many parents are contemplating whether to send the future of our country to manners school for three months or allow them to join the rest of the family on vacation.

Recalling some episodes when I was a teen-in-tow on family vacations, let me just say to you parents, presidentially, I feel your pain.

I’m not a child psychologist. Nor would I attempt to play one on TV. But I have three professional recommendations to make.

1. Parents, relax.

2. Teens, chill.

3. Family, all together now, plan a real family vacation.

What, exactly, is a “real” family vacation?

I think I know what it’s not. It’s not every one in the family going somewhere together but remaining ear-phoned and wired to his or her various electronic devices so they can shut out distractions; i.e. brothers and sisters, sons and daughters, mothers and dads.

I also think I know what it is.

I know about a family vacation that is really different. It is for all ages. It guarantees quality family time. It’s an expedition, an adventure, summer camp, summer school and even manners school all rolled into one. Plus, it’s real in a way that Disneyworld and Busch Gardens could never be.

The perfect family vacation? A cruise. Wait. I’m not talking about a cruise on a big impersonal ship with a thousand cabins. I mean a cruise on a private yacht with just two or three cabins.

Instead of crossing an expanse of ocean to dock at foreign shopping districts, imagine your family cruising the sheltered Gulf Intracoastal Waterway past Southwest Florida’s gulf barrier islands and wild mangrove sanctuaries where herons, egrets, pelicans and ospreys roost.

Leave the earphones, cell phones and laptops at home. This is an expedition into the wild. This is not the family vacations that I recall with my brother, sister and me fighting for the best seat in the family station wagon. On the bridgedeck, there is no such thing as a bad seat.

You’ll see dolphins surf your wake, take note of a magnificent frigatebird soaring overhead, and see a giant ray in the clear water below, half-buried in the sand, thinking you don’t see him. Then, when the ray knows his hiding place is exposed, he’ll blow out of there in a puff of sand. Disney could fake that, but you’d know it was not the real thing, and your heart wouldn’t take the same kind of leap.

Drop the dinghy in the water one morning and paddle to a pristine Gulf beach. You may find the paddle marks where a loggerhead struggled up beyond the high tide mark to lay her eggs.

On the beach, maybe you’ll find a coquina shell with a tiny, smoothly-rounded hole in it. This is the hole made by a snail or a whelk with a tongue-like part called a radula. The predator drilled that hole and ate the animal inside. Keep it as a reminder that the natural world is not always kind, but is endlessly fascinating.

Toward the end of the day you’ll anchor up in a remote cove and organize a family fishing tournament on the stern. Maybe somebody will volunteer to take the dinghy to shore and gather up some clams and the family chef and his/her assistant will make a one-pot fish stew satisfying to all. As dark gathers, the family will gather on the fly-bridge and watch a sliver of a moon appear over the mangroves and stars emerge against a black sky. Out here, on a clear night, without the glare of city lights, you can see 5,000 stars. But look at one. Now, imagine; you could be looking at the light of a star that no longer exists. You’re seeing light that took a million years to reach you.

The best lessons are learned like that, not from a textbook.

Be sure to schedule some family events like a beachside picnic, a dinghy race, a diving contest off the transom. Memories are made of this, memories as compelling as anything except for perhaps ghost stories around a campfire at Girl Scout camp. Oh, what the heck, tell some ghost stories, too.

Here’s another bonus: in September, if a teacher should assign the dreaded what-I-did-on-my-vacation essay, the student will have something to write about.

For safety’s sake there are some serious dos and don’ts on a cruising yacht and the captain insists they be followed. You might say the atmosphere is lighthearted, but disciplined. When you think about it, you could say the rules for a successful cruise are probably the same as the rules for the successful life.

A family vacation that teaches that lesson might be the best vacation of all.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: The Real Florida

2005-05-01T13:38:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
Real Florida
By Barb Hansen
May 2, 2005

The Florida tourist high season is January through April. So, I suppose that makes the spring, summer and fall months our “low” season.

Well, I love the low season.

“Real Florida,” as our state tourism officials call it, really comes alive in those months and that’s when we locals take the time to enjoy our state, too.

Here at Southwest Florida Yachts the pace of work and life in general is a tad more relaxed. Vic and I can finally push our desk chairs back and plan a cruise for ourselves instead of just arranging charters and yacht classes for others.

Cruising is as good as it gets. Just as the automotive traffic softens on I-75, so does marine traffic soften on the Gulf ICW behind our famous outer islands like Captiva, Sanibel, Useppa, Cayo Costa, and Gasparilla.

Bridge tender language still goes pretty much by the book but this mate hears a friendliness in their voices that I don’t detect during the wait-your-turn season. At the little dock at Cabbage Key there is always a slip for a boat and a table for two.

Dockmasters actually sound happy when we radio them and ask for a slip. At this time of the year we can find an empty lounge chair to lounge by the pool at 'Tween Waters Inn.

Everybody’s metabolism slows down a notch in the summer. We walk a bit slower, talk a bit slower, watch the clouds build and look forward to that afternoon storm and the cool air that follows. Then we watch the sun go down. The breezes off the water blow cool even in the warmest months and the Margaritas are always cold. No worries, mon.

Florida’s wildlife has its own high season and it seems to kick in just about the time so many tourists go home.

Tarpon -- bow to the king -- migrate along the Gulf beaches toward Boca Grande Pass in huge numbers May through July. So do Florida’s tarpon anglers. Snook find their way along the mangrove roots from the upper rivers and bays back to the Gulf passes. Local flats anglers stay right with them. Florida’s low season mornings are picture perfect for jumping tarpon and plugging for snook.

Migratory birds that have wintered in Mexico and Central America fly across the Caribbean and the Gulf of Mexico and make landfall here, hungrily biting all the new berries , buds, seeds and insects they can get their beaks on. Florida birders (you can recognize them by their expensive binoculars) hover around mulberry, fig and sea grape trees and yell out to their comrades-in-optics. “Hey, here’s a female Rose Breasted Grosbeak with red juice all down her chest.” The yelling starts in late April and continues well into the summer. Come September and October, we see the birds again as they rest up and feed up for that long flight back to their wintering grounds. And, with those first cold fronts of the fall, south Florida welcomes back its own migrating snowbirds such as loons and white pelicans from Canada.

I like showing off our lovely part of Florida to visitors during the low season and I’ve always thought it way too sad that so many fail to come here at a time of the year when Florida really shines.

I don’t know what the tourism officials are saying but it seems to me that each year more northern visitors are choosing to come to Southwest Florida in spring and summer.

Lower rates are inviting, I’m sure, but I’m happy for them because they will get to experience the Florida that we year-round Floridians enjoy.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: If It's Brown, You're Aground

2005-04-01T13:35:00.000-08:00

View from the Marina
If It’s Brown, You’re Aground
By Barb Hansen
April 1, 2005
Hundreds of books are available to us about how to be better boaters. But in my book even the very best nautical tome, Chapman’s Piloting, Seamanship and Small Boat Handling, places a distant second to learning on the vessel with the help of an experienced captain.
Speaking as the proprietor of a live-aboard yacht school – Okay, twist my arm: Florida Sailing & Cruising School – this kind of learning operates on at least three levels. You’re seeing it. You’re doing it. You’re having fun. Compare that to burning the midnight oil to cram for the final. The old saw is true: Tell me, I forget. Show me, I remember. Involve me, I understand.
I know, I know, book learning is a wonderful thing. I’ll be the first to say the printing press lifted western civilization out of the dark ages and taught us about everything from Greek philosophy to Madonna’s sex life. But even if you have memorized Chapman’s Piloting from page 6 to page 636, you haven’t heard our Captain Gary Graham calmly talking you and your trawler safely through a tight spot.
Negotiating the skinny channel between Pine Island and the Florida mainland, you probably would have heard Captain Gary say, “If it’s blue, sail on through; if it’s brown, you’ll run aground. You didn’t read that in Chapman.
Let’s say you’re up on the fly bridge and your assignment as the student is to park this yacht with a 12-foot beam in a 12-foot slip. There’s wind. (Of course) You’re facing astern with your hands on the gears and throttles. Engines are throbbing, as is your heart, which is in your throat. At this point the instructor, Captain Greg Corsones, puts it all in the perspective of experience. Says he, “Only go as fast you want to hit something.”
Right on.
Captain Bob Mahood jives up his sailing course with a reminder to skippers to “keep the slimy side down.” Anybody who has cruised the skinny-water bays of Southwest Florida has seen our egrets and herons walking on water. Says Bob, “Don’t sail where birds walk.”
Captain Greg reminds his students, “Boats have neutral for a reason. If you don’t know where you’re going, don’t go.” I like his observation about other boaters seen breaking the rules of the road: “Seldom right, but never in doubt.”
“When’s the best time to reef your sails,” a student asks. “The first time you think you should,” answers Capt. Graham.
My Vic gets off a couple of good ones in his lectures. “If you run aground, have a drink!” That’s his shorthand for telling skippers what to do (or, rather, what not to do) if they should run aground.
First make sure the boat is not sinking. Shut down the engines and go to the fridge for something cold to drink. Kick back and assess the situation. He tells the story of the skipper who ran up on a sand bar. All he had to do is wait for the tide to come in. But, in a panic to do something he put the engines in reverse gear and promptly tore up two prop shafts.” The physician’s code works for boaters, too. First, do no harm.
Once upon a time the proprietor of a certain yacht school and her husband ran up on an Everglades mud flat and put their vessel on its side. Eventually the tide came back in and floated the vessel again. Periodically, Vic and I will remind each other of that learning experience. Embarrassment is better than expensive. And you never forget embarrassment.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Healthy Marriages, Healthy Kids

2005-03-01T13:31:00.000-08:00

Healthy Marriages, Healthy Kids
By Barb Hansen
March 1, 2005

Are you bouncing back and forth on confused seas? Does your internal compass swing wildly around? Dr. Lucy Loveboat can help calm your troubled waters. Here’s a recent exchange of letters between the eminent counselor and a bachelorette in Annapolis.

Dear Doctor Loveboat

I met this guy at a meet-up, one of those dating deals where you spend two minutes talking with 20 different men. I found myself face to face with this really good-looking, tanned, healthy, smiling, smart, vibrant guy. I asked him what he liked to do. He told me he liked to cruise on his boat. I’m not a boater. What should I do?

Anxious in Annapolis

Dear Anxious (Don’t be.)

Marry that man. Go boating with him. Bear his children. Involve your children in boating. It’s not just me saying this. Research backs it up. Boating makes marriages happier and kids healthier.

I call your attention to an online survey of 542 boat owners and 536 non-boat owners by Impulse Research Corporation of Los Angeles. The findings show that the boat owners reported higher levels of satisfaction in marriage and romance than non-boaters. Not only that, Anxious in Annapolis, but boat owners more than others rated their overall well-being, health, work, leisure, sleep and finances as “very good” or “excellent.”

That’s not all. Another study of 1004 parents asked them about the health and happiness of their children. National Marine Manufacturers Association, which also commissioned this survey, reported that the kids who boat are healthier than their non-boating kids physically and psychologically. They are more outgoing, more optimistic, more self-confident, more likely to be better team players and more likely to be leaders among their peer group.

The research also shows that boating kids are more likely to do household chores and help with cooking. They have more interests, participating regularly in eight activities compared to only four for non-boating kids. Another family bonus: boating children spend more quality time with parents, even in non-boating months.

Go for it, Anxious. You’re going to get to see an exciting side of life and perhaps a braver side of yourself. As your family grows and goes boating together, you’ll see your progeny absorb just the right mixtures of independence and discipline, courage and caution, brains and brawn. Boating does that to its people, the young and the not-so-young.

Safe boating teaches kids to do what Mom and Dad say. Boating with kids teaches Mom and Dad how to have fun like kids. Living on a boat teaches us to leave our Game Boys and laptops at home. Living aboard teaches us to get along and to enjoy each other’s company and special differences.

You’ll get to see your five-year-old excitedly watching a crab crawl across the sand. Is that not a mutually-exhilarating experience for mother and child? You’ll smile inside when you watch that little kid with muscles lower the anchor. You’ll shed a proud mother’s tear when you overhear your confident pre-teen on the marine radio asking the dockmaster about a slip for the night. You’ll be onboard when your teenager flawlessly puts your vessel into a tight slip or carries out his or her responsibilities during a bad situation on the water.

To paraphrase the credit card commercial, the experiences of boating are priceless. I’d say, priceless in two ways. One, your children learn and hone the skills of life. And, two, you get to see them grow into responsible, happy citizens.

Good luck to you, Anxious in Annapolis. Luck, yes, because none of these good things are guaranteed. You’ll still have to work at it. Yes, of course, of course; you should go on a few dates. But if you decide to marry this man and join the crusing lifestyle, you can take some comfort in the favorable odds that boating gives you.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Ships of Foolishness?

2005-02-01T16:16:00.000-08:00

View from the Marina
JUMBO CRUISE SHIP? GIVE ME A SMALL SHIP ANY DAY!
By Barb Hansen
February 1, 2005

Cruise ships are popular. I know because they keep getting bigger. And bigger. Next thing you know they’ll make one longer than three football fields, something big enough for 3,500 sardines. Oops. I meant passengers.

Oops again. I just learned they have already launched a cruise ship for more than 3,500 lemmings. Did I say that? Sorry. I meant consumers. Well, yes, it’s true. It has 1,487 cabins and bunks for 3,710 really thin but not too long people.

Impressive specs, she has: consumers will take advantage of a million miles of buffet lines, 2-million -miles of interior passageways, 5-million slot machines, and 6-trillion drink umbrellas.

The entire ship goes to one little island and everyone gets off for a few hours and snorkels around the same fish. The next day they are allowed off the ship to go shopping for tourist trinkets and when they get back to the vessel they can slide their credit card through more machines and acquire still more trinkets.

Different strokes for different folks and all that but is it really smart to be launching 4,000-passenger ships? I worry a bit that every time one of these paeans to second-wave mass marketing sails they’re going to make some cruisers turn away from boating all together. Now, that’s a shame.

That’s not for me. I vote for the little ship that could, something with two or maybe three cabins instead of two or three thousand cabins. What a difference a boat makes. One has 21 restaurants. The other has one galley and a small fridge. One has chefs, captains and waiters. The other requires you to bring your own groceries and you have to do your own cooking. One plies the high seas. The other cruises smoothly along a placid coastal waterway framed by mangrove wilderness.

My vessel doesn’t have an activities director; it doesn’t have an ATM; it doesn’t have an onboard hospital. In fact, it doesn’t have a schedule unless you say so. If it’s Tuesday, it won’t be Belgium but just tell the captain and you could be on Sanibel Island, Captiva Island, Cabbage Key, Useppa Island, or a beach you’ll have all to yourself on Cayo Costa.

The little boat that could doesn’t have line dance contests. Passengers don’t cut into the buffet line to take the last shrimp. On my cruise ship, dressing up for a meal means pulling a tee shirt over your swimsuit. After your delicious repast -- Hey, you bought the groceries -- prepared by loving hands in the private galley, you can have drinks on the aft deck.

There is no disco, no line dancing, no ballroom waltzes. But if you want to shake a leg you can climb the steps to the fly bridge and whoop and holler a bit. Just a bit, though. Or, you may prefer to just sit in silent pleasure as the Florida sun sinks behind those dramatic clouds on the horizon.

Put this information in your vacation planner. And the next time you’re thinking about a cruise, think small. Like two or three cabins small.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: The Beach is Good for the Soul

2005-01-03T16:14:00.000-08:00

View from the Marina
THE BEACH, LIKE A CRUISE, IS GOOD FOR THE SOUL
By Barb Hansen
January 3, 2005

A visit to the beach almost always becomes part of the float plan when our charters plot their cruises along the barrier islands of Southwest Florida. “We’d like to spend a little time on the beach,” they say. Vic and I expect this. “Yes, of course.”

On the charts we show them Cayo Costa, a Gulf island and state park accessible only by boat, and point them toward the best anchorage on the backside of the island. “You can row the dinghy in and it’s only a short walk across the island to the beach. You’ll probably have it all to yourselves.”

Life’s a Beach, the expression goes. Actually, I believe Life’s a Cruise. Both are journeys. They are what we make of them, allowing for some good weather and stormy weather. In either case, we should all include visits to the beach in our life plans.

What is it about the beach exactly that so strongly attracts us to the beach? Are our senses keener on the beach or are the sights and sounds really more vivid? The clean intersection of land, sky and water is surely dramatic. Some charters say they want to be the first on the beach in the morning to pick up shells left behind by the high tide. Some want to be there when the sun sinks into the horizon, lighting up the clouds in vibrant color.

For sure these are terrific reasons to go to the beach but let us not forget all of the other things that beaches let us do.

For one thing, on weekends the people-watching is as good as it gets, an Easter parade without all that the frilly fabric. (On the beach, however, you will see some outrageous hats that look like parodies of Eastern bonnets.) All who walk the beach are equal under the sun and that includes grown boys in Speedos, babes in thongs, and the rest of us in possible need of a nip or a tuck. The beach doesn’t care and neither should you. The beach is the beach whether you’re cavorting with the fancy people at the Ritz Carlton in Naples or the “boat people” on Cayo Costa.

The beach and the sheriff are pretty much okay with anything you want to do on the beach including but not limited to surfing, swimming, shelling, tanning, reading, napping, walking, running, partying, picnicking, kicking a beach ball, throwing a Frisbee or burying your partner in sand. In that last instance the sheriff will insist that you leave the head uncovered so your partner can still breathe.

You can help your young children or grandchildren build sandcastles. You can tell them about the treasure that pirates are said to have buried on this beach years ago. You can help them search for a treasure from a foreign land that may have washed up on this remote Florida beach.

You can supervise the little ones as they shovel sand into a plastic bucket then dump it back into the water, again and again, all the while showing that determined, get-the-job-done look that toddlers get when they’re occupied in meaningful work.

Whatever it is about the beach that makes you want to visit the beach, it seems to me that the beach has a way of transferring energy from the body to the brain. You’re left physically tired but mentally re-charged.

Back on the boat, with good food and rest, you’ll replenish those energy levels. Both body and brain will be in forward gear as the journey resumes.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: 12 Days of a Florida Christmas

2004-12-01T16:12:00.000-08:00

View from the Marina
Holiday Song Syndrome
By Barb Hansen
December 1, 2004

I went to a department store the other day and caught Holiday Song Syndrome. Now I’ve got turtle doves, calling birds, and French hens on my mind, on my mind, on my mind.

You remember this song, don’t you? Twelve drummers drumming, eleven pipers piping, ten lords a-leaping, nine ladies dancing, eight maids a-milking, seven swans a-swimming, six geese a-laying, five golden rings, four calling birds, three French hens, two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree. Repeat 12 times.

All these birds and whatnots are accompanied by a catchy tune and I can live with it for a time but, really, those lords leaping and maids milking get old fast. Vic said maybe it would help if I substituted new images. Get rid of those pipers piping and pear tree partridges, he said, and substitute some of the birds and sea-life we get to watch here in subtropical Southwest Florida. We don’t have maids a-milking, but we have manatees, which are mammals. We don’t have lords a-leaping, but our dolphins leap. All this you can see for yourself while cruising the placid backsides of our barrier islands like Sanibel, Captiva, Useppa, Boca Grande and Cabbage Key.

So, here we go, with my apologies to the Twelve Days of Christmas song. I call it the “Twelve Days of a Southwest Florida Cruise.” You can hum this to the natural rhythms in the air, like engines humming, sails slapping, halyards clanking, and waves a-lapping.

On the first day of cruising my true love gave to me
A pelican in a mangrove tree.

On the second day of cruising my true love gave to me
Two turtles from the sea.

On the third day of cruising my true love gave to me
Three manatees.

On the fourth day of cruising my true love gave to me
Four frigatebirds.

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Five calling loons.

On the sixth day of cruising my true love gave to me
Six cormorants swimming.

On the seventh day of cruising my true love gave to me
Seven herons prancing.

On the eighth day of cruising my true love gave to me
Eight rays a-flying.

On the ninth day of cruising my true love gave to me
Nine skimmers skimming.

On the tenth day of cruising my true love gave to me
Ten dolphins leaping.

On the eleventh day of cruising my true love gave to me
Eleven spoonbills spooning

On the twelfth day of cruising my true love gave to me
Twelve egrets posing.

Truth in advertising prompts me to say that we don’t really have calling loons in Florida. Canada sends us her loons for the winter, and they thrive on our warm weather and saltwater baitfish, but I’ve never heard these snowbirds make their haunting calls here in Florida. In winter Canada also sends us white pelicans, which are much larger than our brown pelicans. My other tilt toward poetic license has to do with the frigatebirds, AKA man-o-war bird. We see them in summer but rarely in winter.

Still, anytime of the year, cruising Southwest Florida’s inland passage gives visitors an amazing panorama of sea life and bird life in their natural environment.

Witnesses a-welcome.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: A Thanksgiving Toast

2004-11-01T16:11:00.000-08:00

View from the Marina
A Thanksgiving Toast
By Barb Hansen
November 1, 2004

Some years ago I gave Vic a tee shirt that read, “Life is an adventure, not a guided tour.”

Since it is that time of year when we give thanks for all that is good and right in our lives, I will give thanks for the gift of the adventurous spirit that Vic and I share. That spirit has defined our 20 (going on 21 years) together as partners and proprietors of Southwest Florida Yachts and Florida Sailing & Cruising School.

This is not to say that bad things don’t happen. It would be easy to be brought down with the negative stuff in the headlines like wars, pestilence and famines. It would be easy to dwell too long and negatively on the close-to-home issues, too, like the difficult people we have to deal with, personal tragedies, health problems, and weather calamities.

In southwest Florida we’ll remember Hurricane Charley of 2004 for a long time. Hurricane Charley came ashore at Charlotte Harbor and damaged some of the vessels in our sailing fleet. Our mutual response? “It could have been worse.” In years to come when we recall Hurricane Charley, I believe we will exchange wry, knowing smiles that confirm the old saw, “If it doesn’t kill you, it will make you stronger.”

We try to keep it all in perspective. With all of life’s challenges, there is still much for which to be thankful. In time, when we look back on life’s difficult episodes, we see that adversity and adventure often are just cousins. In time, some of those painful episodes can become adventures. We always try to make them so.

Our spirit of adventure has defined what we do with our free time as well. (Boating, of course). Different strokes for different folks but guided tours aren’t for us. Every cruise is a personal adventure times three. We create it. We do it. We remember it.

As a memory-maker, this year’s Thanksgiving Cruise will be no exception. The weather will be almost perfect (it always is this time of year in southwest Florida) as we cruise through the beautiful barrier islands of Sanibel, Captiva, Cayo Costa, and Gasparilla.

Like the early settlers, we will take the dinghy to explore an unhabitated key and search for island treasures. Our dog Star will race herself down the beach, chase jumping mullet, and play bite the ball with a coconut.

As we trawler comfortably on our way, dear friends will pay their courtesy calls. Dolphins will play in our wake. Ospreys will say hello with a tilt of the wing. Pelicans will dive into the froth behind our trawler. Sometimes a manatee will rise to the surface and look us straight in the eye.

Anchored in a quiet cove, we will settle in at the flybridge table to watch the sun set. We’ll click plastic glasses together and share our annual Thanksgiving Toast:

Thanks for the gift of adventure and a boat to seek it in.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Star the Wonder Dog

2004-10-20T14:59:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
Star the Wonder Dog
By Barb Hansen

What if there were a World’s Best Boat Dog for the year? You could submit your nominations to me: however, Vic and I would be the judges. You should know that Vic and I have declared Star, our border collie, as the winner. Your dog could come in second.

Well, why not a World’s Best Boat Dog contest? I read recently about the Canine World Hero contest. I have read about a Dress Up Your Dog contest and a Monster Dawg Pull contest. There is a Most Like a Rock Star contest, a Looks like a Famous Person contest, and Looks Most Like Owner contest.

We’re not looking for pedigree or prancing like you’ve seen on TV from the Westminster Kennel Club show. On the scale of dog contests, ours is on the other end, perhaps closer to the coon hunt where dogs harmonize in 10-parts and make their owners proud and in which all canine contestants are thereinafter declared winners. Our World’s Best Boat Dog contest would be something like that. But, of course, Star would be first among equals.

Traditionally, border collies herded sheep. We have not given Star the opportunity to herd sheep. However, Star may be the only border collie who herds dolphins from the deck of any trawler or sailboat. Just a whistle and the cry "daaaalphin" from anyone aboard, and Star leaps into action, rapidly moving from one side of the boat to the other and barking at the playful creatures as they surf our bow wave or jump in the boat's wake astern.

This contest would have a special division for deceased dogs and, in this category, Vic and I have nominated our dearly departed Shadow, a lab mix who gave new meaning to the term retriever. Environmentalist that she was, Shadow would dive in the water and retrieve beer bottles and other discarded containers tossed overboard by inconsiderate slobs. If we could have outfitted her with a mask and snorkel, Shadow would have dog paddled around for hours with her head submerged and her eyes searching the bottom for discarded bottles and such. I know they make personal flotation devices for dogs. Has anybody invented a mask-and-snorkel for dogs?

Vic and I applaud all who have helped their dogs make the transition to boat dog. Spending time on the boat with your dog is good for the owners because pets, well, just smooth things out for their lucky owners no matter where they are. Most dogs grow to love the boating life. If you’re going for a cruise, they say, Take Me With You. That’s the way dogs are unless you’re going to the vet. How do they know?

Yes, there are some things you have to do to accommodate their lifestyles, like row them to shore a couple or three times a day. But, that’s a small effort for the dog love you get in return. (Lord, please help me be the person my dog thinks I am.)

Sit. Write. Speak. Think about that special canine companion of yours and all the great cruising time shared.

Good boy.

CRUISING WITH NON-BOATING GUESTS (Or how to survive having landlubbers aboard!)

2004-10-20T14:46:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
Cruising with Non-Boating Guests
By Barb Hansen
October 1, 2004

Did you see the cartoon about the invited couple arriving at the hosts’ vessel for the overnight cruise? The “vessel,” I should note, is a rather tiny thing.

The lady is wearing a miniskirt and high heels. He’s still wearing his rumpled suit from work. He has an overstuffed briefcase tucked under his arm. His shoulder is weighted down with golf clubs and tennis rackets. And everything else they could think of is stuffed into two huge, hard-sided suitcases. Oh, and the cell phone on his belt is ringing.

“We’re here,” she sings, waving a bottle of wine.

Some of you have met this well-meaning couple. The cartoon rather overstates the typical scenario, but makes the point clearly that non-boating guests just don’t know what to bring or what to wear when they’re invited to cruise.

We can also safely assume they do not know boating’s protocols. For example, they do not realize that on a boat it’s really bad form to take long showers or turn on the galley tap and let the water run. They don’t realize that reading lamps are used sparingly, if at all.

Well, you may reasonably ask, if guests are such a problem why do we even invite them to cruise with us? The reason is, we like them. They are our friends. We enjoy their company.

There’s something else. We like to boat. Time is short. So if they cruise with us we can enjoy our friends and the boat at the same time.

The challenge is, how do we gently educate new friends about the do’s and don’ts of cruising. We don’t want to hurt their feelings, but they need to know the rules of the boat and the protocols of boating.

I usually talk to the female ahead of time and tell her what to wear and what to bring and, importantly, what not to bring. I tell them the boat only has so much fresh water so we take quick and infrequent showers. I say boating is a lot like camping. Space is tight. Reading lights are fine when the boat is running or plugged in to power at a marina, but otherwise they just drain the batteries. Vic carries on the male version of that conversation with the man.

I’ve found it helpful to couch all the warnings in the context of the rewards of boating. Cruising is that way, I say. We give up so many of the luxuries in order to experience the joy of being on the water.

Some items are best discussed when the guests are on the boat and can see what you’re talking about. We show them the PFDs and how to put them on. We show them the first aid kit, the flashlight, the fire extinquishers. We tell them what to do with wet towels and such. We cover safety matters like never letting their hands get pinched between the boat railing and the pilings. Regarding the propane stove, we just simply ask them to let Vic or I take care of all the cooking and heating.

One of the problems is that guests want to be helpful. However, on a boat, if their volunteering is not channeled, it can be dangerous. You know what I’m talking about. I usually give our guests some real boating clean-up assignments in advance and ask them not to worry about doing anything else. That way they can make a real contribution to the cruise. They’ll feel better and so will you.

There is another reason why Vic and I like our friends to cruise with us. Ambassadors of boating that we are, we want all our friends to like boating, too. To do that, we’ve got to get them on the boat and give them a taste of the good life.

So we tell them ahead of time to shed those street clothes and get into water clothes. We tell them there won’t be time for golf, tennis, office work or cell phones.

But we also tell them there will be time for a sunrise from the bridge while taking the first few sips of coffee of the day. There will be time to watch dolphins surf the bow wave. And there will be time for watching a black sky carpeted from horizon to horizon with millions of brilliant stars.

WINTER IS ON THE WAY - THINK FLORIDA THIS WINTER!

2004-10-20T14:30:00.000-07:00

I’ve heard it said that there’s no change of seasons in Florida. Of course there are seasons – “high” season and “low” season!

Seriously, as I write this fall is in the air. The mornings seem cooler, the palm trees sway to the gentle sea breeze, and the harvest moon glows brighter in the clear star-filled night sky. After the hurricanes of the last two months, it is as if Mother Nature has waived her wand of beauty and calm over us. And all is right with our world again.

Those of us in the Fort Myers area feel very lucky to have had such minor effects from the recent storms. Of course, “Charley” came the closest to our area, but the clean up has been swift and thorough. I had a caller ask me recently if our cruising area was “devastated.” My answer was, “absolutely not.” All of the marinas of Sanibel, Captiva, Cabbage Key, Useppa, and Gasparilla islands, except one, are already open or will be open by the end of this month. Southwest Florida is ready for business! And the islands and resorts will be better than ever. Of course, a few sandbars have shifted locations and a new pass or two have been created, but that has always been the nature of our cruising area whether we have a hurricane or not. Unfortunately, other parts of Florida did not fare nearly as well as we did here. We wish the people and businesses of the Panhandle, the East coast, and central Florida a speedy recovery. Please remember that the Hurricane Relief efforts for those areas that were hit the hardest depend, in part, on your contributions to the American Red Cross. ( http://www.redcross.org/ )

So, with the arrival of the fall season and winter not far behind, now would be a good time to plan your vacation to our islands. And what better way to see the islands than aboard a private sail or power yacht. Whether you want a weekend “getaway” cruise, a leisurely sailing charter, or a challenging power boating class we have it all.
We hope to see you soon in beautiful Southwest Florida! (http://www.swfyachts.com)

VIW FROM THE MARINA: Cruising with Non-Boating Guests

2004-10-01T16:06:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
Cruising with Non-Boating Guests
By Barb Hansen

Did you see the cartoon about the invited couple arriving at the hosts’ vessel for the overnight cruise? The “vessel,” I should note, is a rather tiny thing.

The lady is wearing a miniskirt and high heels. He’s still wearing his rumpled suit from work. He has an overstuffed briefcase tucked under his arm. His shoulder is weighted down with golf clubs and tennis rackets. And everything else they could think of is stuffed into two huge, hard-sided suitcases. Oh, and the cell phone on his belt is ringing.

“We’re here,” she sings, waving a bottle of wine.

Some of you have met this well-meaning couple. The cartoon rather overstates the typical scenario, but makes the point clearly that non-boating guests just don’t know what to bring or what to wear when they’re invited to cruise.

We can also safely assume they do not know boating’s protocols. For example, they do not realize that on a boat it’s really bad form to take long showers or turn on the galley tap and let the water run. They don’t realize that reading lamps are used sparingly, if at all.

Well, you may reasonably ask, if guests are such a problem why do we even invite them to cruise with us? The reason is, we like them. They are our friends. We enjoy their company.

There’s something else. We like to boat. Time is short. So if they cruise with us we can enjoy our friends and the boat at the same time.

The challenge is, how do we gently educate new friends about the do’s and don’ts of cruising. We don’t want to hurt their feelings, but they need to know the rules of the boat and the protocols of boating.

I usually talk to the female ahead of time and tell her what to wear and what to bring and, importantly, what not to bring. I tell them the boat only has so much fresh water so we take quick and infrequent showers. I say boating is a lot like camping. Space is tight. Reading lights are fine when the boat is running or plugged in to power at a marina, but otherwise they just drain the batteries. Vic carries on the male version of that conversation with the man.

I’ve found it helpful to couch all the warnings in the context of the rewards of boating. Cruising is that way, I say. We give up so many of the luxuries in order to experience the joy of being on the water.

Some items are best discussed when the guests are on the boat and can see what you’re talking about. We show them the PFDs and how to put them on. We show them the first aid kit, the flashlight, the fire extinquishers. We tell them what to do with wet towels and such. We cover safety matters like never letting their hands get pinched between the boat railing and the pilings. Regarding the propane stove, we just simply ask them to let Vic or I take care of all the cooking and heating.

One of the problems is that guests want to be helpful. However, on a boat, if their volunteering is not channeled, it can be dangerous. You know what I’m talking about. I usually give our guests some real boating clean-up assignments in advance and ask them not to worry about doing anything else. That way they can make a real contribution to the cruise. They’ll feel better and so will you.

There is another reason why Vic and I like our friends to cruise with us. Ambassadors of boating that we are, we want all our friends to like boating, too. To do that, we’ve got to get them on the boat and give them a taste of the good life.

So we tell them ahead of time to shed those street clothes and get into water clothes. We tell them there won’t be time for golf, tennis, office work or cell phones.

But we also tell them there will be time for a sunrise from the bridge while taking the first few sips of coffee of the day. There will be time to watch dolphins surf the bow wave. And there will be time for watching a black sky carpeted from horizon to horizon with millions of brilliant stars.

HURRICANE TUG OF WAR

2004-09-06T13:46:00.000-07:00

Hurricanes are like wars, I have decided. For one thing they hurt a lot of people indiscriminately. And, for another, if they don’t hurt you, both hurricanes and wars force us to ask the question, “What should I do to help?”

In the wake of Hurricane Charley, trying to get to the correct answer to that question, I have been pulling for both sides of a huge tug-of-war in my brain.

I’ll explain, but first let me fill you in on what happened.

Hurricane Charley came ashore as a Category 4 on August 13. It cut through Sanibel and Captiva Islands and drove straight up Charlotte Harbor. It pounded Punta Gorda and Port Charlotte, the two towns on either side of the bay, and wrecked lives and homes in numerous inland towns from here to Jacksonville. It killed people. It left many hundreds injured, hungry, thirsty, hot, homeless, and out of work. It ripped off roofs, picking up seven-pound roofing tiles and hurtling them through the air and into windows, walls and what have you.

During the worst of the storm all Vic and I could do was anxiously wonder what Charley was doing to our charter boat fleets. We had 12 trawlers tied up in slips at Marinatown Marina in N. Fort Myers on the north bank of the Caloosahatchee. But we were especially worried about our fleet of 9 sailing vessels, which we keep at Burnt Store Marina near Punta Gorda, which was in the hurricane’s crosshairs. Of course, we imagined the worse.

Well, we were lucky. Very lucky.

Our sailing fleet at Burnt Store Marina was pretty banged up, but all the vessels stayed afloat and remained in their slips. They required some repairs, but only three needed the attention of a boat yard.

Though powerful, Charley was a relatively small storm. The eye wall was only ten miles wide, they said. Consequently, our power fleet 20 miles south of Punta Gorda in N. Fort Myers did not suffer as much damage. In fact, only one vessel was out of commission for a short while.

We were lucky twice at our headquarters here at Marinatown Marina in N. Fort Myers. We were on the south side of the typhoon’s rotation, so we had expected southwest winds to push ocean water up the Caloosahatchee River and create a storm surge of more than 10 feet. It didn’t happen. The thinking is that because Charley was a fast-moving storm there was not enough time for it to push a large volume of water up the river.

Yes. We were very lucky. This brings me back to the question I asked myself. What should I do to help all those people who were not so lucky.

Well, I thought, I could load the car up with canned goods and bottled water and take them to a shelter. That will help them, and I’d feel better, too.

Or, maybe it would be better if I paid attention to business. There are insurance forms to complete, calls to make, emails to send, and customers to find. But, I thought, wouldn’t that be unseemly, promoting the joys of cruising while so many are hurting?

On the one hand I wanted to be part of the good Samaritan effort. Ordinary people set up their own personal help stations on the highways with hand-lettered signs offering free water, ice, sandwiches, diapers, blankets and toiletries. The South Florida Marine Industry Associations loaded a semi-tractor trailer with supplies and delivered it to people in need in the marine community. Boat U.S. and West Marine organized boaters to load up their cars and deliver fuel and ice to nursing homes and assisted living facilities. The Associated Press wrote about these things and sent out an article called, What Makes America Great. That is so true. The people who took that initiative are heroes in my book.

But I thought, I had work to do, lots of it, to get the business humming again. The grocer pulls overtime to get his store shelves restocked. The gas station owner can’t wait to start pumping gas again. Shouldn’t the lady who charters yachts and puts on boating courses do as much?

I guess you could say my mental tug-of-war ended in the recognition that we needed to do both. Helping people in trouble was important and especially so in the short term. Our staff gathered up several boxes of extra bedding and galley items from charter boats past and donated them to the relief effort.

The long-term goal is getting businesses humming again so visitors will return to Southwest Florida. Tourism is, after all, the engine of growth for Florida. Business owners who get their businesses back up and running as quickly as possible are not only doing a service for themselves, but for the community.

If some who do not live in Southwest Florida are concerned about coming here on vacation, I say, don’t be. Florida’s Southwest coast is pretty close to humming in all cylinders and the welcome mat is out.

In the wake of Hurricane Charley, you may also ask: What can I do to help? I know the answer.

Come visit, that’s what.

HURRICANE CHARLEY UPDATE #2

2004-09-06T13:41:00.000-07:00

Southwest Florida Yachts reopens calendar for charters.

This is no consolation to those who lost family or property to Hurricane Charley, but we will note that it could have been much worse and for that we are very grateful.

One, the core of the storm was small, maybe only ten miles wide from eye wall to eye wall. So while those who live near Charlotte Harbor felt the full brunt of a Category 4, many others just a few miles south or north of Charley’s path avoided the most damaging winds.

Two, Charley moved fast, so it did not generate the storm surge that would have done the most damage to waterfront facilities and to boats in the water. Being south of the storm, we expected a huge surge on the Caloosahatchee River where our trawler fleet is based. It did not happen.

Our sailing fleet at Burnt Store Marina near Punta Gorda survived the worst Hurricane Charley could throw at it. Still, all the vessels stayed afloat and remained in their slips. Only three will require the attention of a boat yard. Only one of the vessels in our trawler fleet here in N. Fort Myers may require boat yard attention. So, with a little elbow grease and loving care, our boats will be back in tip-top shape very soon.

Most of your favorite stops on the ICW are ready for you, too, including ‘Tween Waters Inn, Sanibel Marina and Cabbage Key, home of the famous Cheeseburger in Paradise. South Seas Plantation, the hotel and the marina, had serious damage but even here the word is that South Seas will come back in stages and will be fully operational by the end of the year.

There are still many people to help and much work to be done, but boaters in Southwest Florida are now returning to the waterways to get that wonderful feeling you can only get by being in a boat on the water.

So, we’re pleased to announce that the Southwest Florida Yacht appointment calendar has now been reopened for charters starting September 1.

Sunny regards,

Barb and Vic Hansen

WE SURVIVED HURRICANE CHARLEY!

2004-08-23T16:20:00.000-07:00

We survived!
So many friends and customers from all across the country have called or Emailed us to see how we are doing after Hurricane Charley. We are fine. Our boats made it through as well. Some vessels were damaged, but all are floating and all the damage is relatively minor and can be repaired. We thank you all for your kindness and concern.We were lucky. Our thoughts and prayers go out to the thousands of people who lost their homes and businesses just to the north of us in Charlotte County. Like many of you, we have watched the aftermath of natural disasters on our TV screens. Now we are seeing it first hand. Many people, including some of our employees, are still without power and water. However, power and water should be completely restored in our immediate area this week.Progress is being made each day to clean up and rebuild. People are ready to pick up the pieces of their daily lives and move on. Many of the phone calls and e-mails we received have asked, "What can we do?" Of course, the Red Cross and other such agencies need financial contributions directed toward the victims. Southwest Florida also needs you to come and visit, and bring your friends and family. Sure, there will be a period of clean up and recovery. However, don't stay away. The best thing that you can do is to make plans now to visit this fall and winter! Eat in our restaurants, shop at our stores, and . . . call SFY to buy your new boat, take a boating course, or charter a yacht! Come and enjoy the beauty that is still Southwest Florida.
Sunny regards,
Barb and Vic Hansen

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Our Labor of Love

2004-08-23T16:17:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
OUR LABOR OF LOVE
By Barb Hansen
July 1, 2004

The year was 1984. Nuclear arms controls with the Soviet Union were unraveling. The prime loan rate was 13 percent. Vic and I started Southwest Florida Yachts.

I guess we were in an “Oh, what the heck” state of mind. Hey, if you’re going to get hit by a nuclear bomb, why not move to Florida, get married, start a yacht chartering business and a yacht school and, as they say, live happily ever after. Keep in mind that “ever after” on this earth was, in cold war terms, only going to last another couple of months or so.

Except for the part about the nuclear bomb, all of that is pretty much how it has been. Knock-knock. Twenty years on, we’re still living and working the waterfront dream. We have survived the fall of the USSR, the Berlin Wall, the first Gulf War (we tied yellow ribbons on our boats), parachute pants, Pac-Man, the O. J. Simpson trial, Bill Clinton, Hurricane Andrew and, so far, the Islamofascist war against American freedom.

Vic and I subscribe to the philosophy that if you have a job that you love, you’ll never have to work another day in your life.

I realize that’s not 100 percent true. Still I would much prefer to do what I do 12 hours a day than, say, sell insect killer for four hours a day.

And even when I’m tied and bound to the office for 12 hours a day, it’s almost always a good day’s labor of love. I can look out the window 12 months of the year and see blue water and boats and people enjoying both. When clients who charter our yachts or attend one of our live-aboard boating courses are happy and excited, I’m happy and excited for them.

I confess to taking particular pleasure knowing that after 20 years we’re still engaged in our marine industry enterprise while so many other businesses, including many we considered too big to fail, have bitten the dust.

Twenty years ago AT&T was the only long distance company. When we called a customer in those days, we were mindful that it was costing us about $1 a minute. At one time or another the “next big thing” was announced--I recall ads for household gadgets like the Hot Topper and the Clapper--but now are all but forgotten.

In 1984 we did not have a computer. Every letter to a customer had to be a start-from-scratch endeavor. We were here before most had ever heard of a fax machine, or a cell phone, or a Web site. There was no Internet to speak of, no email.

In 1984, instead of browsing the Internet, we watched Cheers, Hill Street Blues, Happy Days, Three’s Company, Dallas, Baywatch, Fantasy Island, Roseanne, The Love Boat and Golden Girls. Today we get “Reality TV,” or so they call it.

It’s enough to make you want to check out of civilization for a few days and go boating. Now that’s something that was with us in 1984, is still with us in 2004 and, I’m confident, will be with us in 2024. Experts say that from time to time we should escape from the routine and stress of our daily lives. Chartering is one of the best ways to escape. Boating reaches deep into the human psyche and scratches an itch that doesn’t get scratched by watching, say, the Fear Factor.

Now I’m not here to advocate dropping out of your life as you know it and sailing off into the sunset. But, a little “escape” now and then does wonders for the mind, body and soul. So, this year, consider putting yourself in this scene: You’re on a luxury trawler anchored in a scenic cove at the end of the day. You’ve got your hand wrapped around a cold drink. The setting sun lights up the clouds with pinks, oranges, purples and reds. And, you think, life really is good.

That’s the best kind of reality program.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: The Boat and Boater Personality

2004-06-12T11:57:00.000-07:00

Many dog owners look and act like their dogs. In fact, many boaters look like their boats. But the thing that fascinates me is how similar boats and boaters are in their personalities.

Vic and I, students of marine behavior that we are, have made these observations based on 20 years of chartering, schooling, concierging and yacht brokering to boats and boaters of all personalities.

Trawler Man and Mrs.
Like their vessel they’re serious and solid, as dependable as the diesels pushing the boat. Their boat has a nomadic and dreamy name like Odyssey or GypSea. He and she are as keen on enjoying every mile as they are in getting to the destination. If it takes three days to get there instead of two, so be it. Like most trawlers you see on the water, Trawler Man and Mrs. have chalked up lots of miles and have stories to tell. But they are game for many more expeditions and look forward to telling you about them in wondrous detail.

Trawler Man likes to wear a dark Greek fisherman’s cap. It looks a lot like the Bimini top on his flybridge. Like his boat, his accoutrements are more comfortable and durable than stylish. Trawler Man stands tall and proud, like his boat, which is a good thing because it wouldn’t be right to ask Trawler Man to stoop in the head or the deckhouse.

Mr. Go Fast
You have, of course, Mr. Go Fast. Like his boat, Mr. Go Fast is known for his styling and performance as well as the company he keeps, typically younger females wearing thong bikinis. His boat is made from space age materials and designed with positive lift surfaces. That’s not unlike the botox and other space age nips and tucks that Captain Speedy may also know something about.

His boat is young and, although he is not, he still enjoys the chase. He wears an open collar exposing silver hair and a gold chain. Like his boat, his shirt will sport custom graphics of very endowed young women. His boat is named Toys in Babeland, Miss Behavin’, Aquaholic or, of course, Wet Dream.

Captain and Mrs. Motoryacht
Like their vessel, Captain Mark and Marilyn Motoryacht are well-appointed, physically attractive and socially-popular. Their outfits are often in the same color schemes as the fabrics on the boat. Mr. Motoryacht never leaves port without his billed captain’s hat. While cruising both the owners on the fly bridge and the vessel strike impressive profiles and merit appreciative and envious looks.

Hardship is something they may have endured when they were younger and working hard to get ahead. Today, though, at the dock or on a cruise, the Captain and Mrs. want everything they worked for, including the assurance that two-tons of house batteries will deliver on demand all warm or cold air and fresh water they will need while on the boat.

The welcome aboard sign is always out on their vessel. The motoryacht and its owners work like a team, impressing and smoothing out life for guests in the large salon, dining room, fly bridge, and assigned stateroom.

The names they choose -- Liquid Asset, Mutual Fun, or Sea Ya! -- tell us they have made it financially and that this is their reward:

Houseboat Hippy
The boat and the skipper were at the top of their game in 1970 and not much has happened to either since then except longer hair and more potted plants on the roof and stern. They are still liveaboards squatting on houseboat row, thumbing their attitude at anybody who works and pays taxes. Their motto is living in harmony with the earth but, apparently, earth does not include the water portion which is expected to process the effluent from these two aging vessels.

Most of these boats don’t have names. What’s the point? They never move.

Sir and Madam Self Sufficiency
You will spot my heroes at the tiller of a sail boat relying on their skills, their good judgment, and just a tiny breeze to reach nirvana. The skippers and their boat do what they do well, over and over, season after season.

Sir and Madam Self Sufficiency know that the life’s luxuries are ephemeral things and that life is lived best when you count on yourselves and your trusty vessel, not on others, not on luxuries. Sailing, like life, is learning to accept the bad and the good in a measured way. So what if the wind dies? So what if the crackers are stale? That monofilament hanging off the stern could mean fresh fish tonight.

Their boat is like its owners, durable and flexible, accommodating itself to what nature dishes out, the good and the bad. It expects to match wits with the elements. It doesn’t expect a compliment when the wind’s at its back. This is life, after all, might as well enjoy it. The name on the transom? Serenity, Solitude, or, perhaps, Destiny.

What’s your boating personality? There’s a boat out there for you and countless islands yet to explore. Remember, it’s not the vessel or the destination that are important, it’s making the journey.

© 2004. Southwest Florida Yachts. All rights reserved.

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Boating Cliches

2004-05-13T13:36:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
Clichés: Boating’s Contribution
By Barb Hansen
April 1, 2004

All hands on deck. Now, okay, pipe down.

I’m starting with a clean slate. I want to be completely above board about this. I have no intention of barging in only to bamboozle you with mere scuttlebutt. I hereby proclaim that I will avoid clichés even if I am under the weather.

It’s too easy to write with clichés. Any writer who knows her ropes and is worth her salt should shape up.

Am I passing with flying colors? No? I guess I’d better mind my P’s and Q’s or there will be devil to pay.

How many clichés did you count? If you counted 14, you’re A1 in my book. Oops. Make that 15.

Here’s the interesting part: these clichés and a bunch more all came from the world of boating. Many I learned at a terrific website called shipsandcruises.com and others from an article freelance writer Chris Caswell wrote in a magazine article in 1997.

Here’s what I learned.

A1. In Lloyd’s Register “A1” was the mark of a first class wooden ship.

Above Board: Pirates would hide crew members below decks to fool victims. When all the crewmen were on the deck then -- seeing is believing – the vessel was more likely to be an honest merchant ship.

All hands on deck: Nowadays we gather to discuss some task. Sailors did the same thing, but met on the deck.

Bamboozle: This was the word used to describe the deceit of pirates who flew an ensign of national origin other than their own.

Barge in: Most believe this term, used today to describe a tactless appearance or interruption, came about because barges are hard to maneuver.

Clean slate: Daily logs were kept on a slab of slate. Each new watch officer would erase the previous entries.

Devil to pay: The “devil” seam which ran along the hull at the deck level, was the most difficult to caulk. To “pay” meant to caulk. Voilá. The sailor had to hang off the deck to caulk the seam and was said to be “between the devil and the deep blue sea.”

Knows the ropes: It took an experienced seaman to know the function of all the ropes on a sailing vessel.

Mind your P’s and Q’s: Short for pints and quarts of ale. Tavern keepers would keep careful track (mind) the tab, especially, of sailors who were about to ship out.

Passed with flying colors: Refers to a sailing ship that distinguished itself by flying all of its pennants and flags (called “colors”) when passing other vessels.

Pipe down. Helmsmen told the crew members on deck that they could “pipe down,” meaning their chores were done and they could return to their quarters below decks.

Scuttlebutt: To discourage idle chit-chat at the ship’s water barrel, the drinking ladle had little holes in it so the water would leak if the sailor didn’t drink it up fast. The holes were called scuttles.

Shape up: This was the term helmsmen used to refer to getting back on course to avoid danger.

Under the weather: The sailor who had to stand watch on the bow taking all the pounding and spray was said to be “under the weather.”

Worth their salt: Salt actually was also used to pay Roman sailors. So any sailor “worth his salt” was worth what he was getting paid.

Clichés, they say, are to be avoided like the plague. But, my, they do come in handy, don’t they?

VIEW FROM THE MARINA: Chartering's Summer School Curricula

2004-05-13T13:33:00.000-07:00

View from the Marina
Chartering’s Summer School Curricula
By Barb Hansen
May 3, 2004

I’m told about one million American children are home schooled. A couple of years ago I met two of them when the Crumpler family of Atlanta came to North Fort Myers and spent three days on one of our boats.

When they returned home Mrs. Crumpler assigned her students their real homework. Her 13-year-old daughter wrote, designed and published a magazine article on her computer. Her 10-year-old son wrote a term paper about what he learned on the boat. You can bet that they learned a lot more because the learning was fun.

Back home in Indiana when I was growing up summer school was the worst thing that could happen to a kid. Today, though, as I think about it, it seems to me there is an opportunity for school-age kids to think of summer school in a fun, new way. Instead of trudging off to an old school building and trying to stay focused on a dull textbook, students could start their school days aboard a charter yacht cruising the beautiful barrier island paradise of Southwest Florida.

In a long summer day, there is plenty to learn and every bit of it is fun.

Astronomy. Astronomy class is held on the forward deck when the stars come out. Away from the lights of the cities the stars and planets shine bright. Each student (teachers, too!) finds a comfortable place to lie down with his or her head on a cushion. Identify planets and stars. Talk about nebulae. Count shooting stars.

Nature and Marine Biology. This class is held on the bow just before lunch when the sun is high and its rays light up the bottom. Students lean against the bow rail and look for huge rays hiding in the sand. Soon a dolphin or maybe two will appear and start surfing the bow wave. On another day marine biology class can be held on the shore with young biologists searching for exotic shells and sharks teeth. Ask the captain to pull into the marina at ‘Tween Waters Inn where students can pet the resident manatee, Mr. Jimmy Buffett. Be sure to bring along a few of the many reference books about dolphins, manatees, fish, birds, shells and more.

History: Students of a certain age are fascinated by the age of pirates. In the U.S. there is no better place than Southwest Florida where Jose Gaspar the famous pirate did his evil deeds and brought the treasures home to Joseffa, his wife (or significant other; we’re not sure). Useppa Island is named after Joseffa. You can go there and even lead a field trip to the Useppa Island Historical Museum

Geography and geology: Where does sand come from? How did barrier islands like Sanibel and Captiva get formed and when? How are they changing?

Writing. When our nieces cruised with us recently, I assigned them the job of “roving dock reporters” for our company newsletter, THE YARDARM. They interviewed dockmasters, took pictures, and wrote stories about their experiences. Just between us they didn’t even know it was really a homework assignment in disguise. After all, it was spring vacation. After dinner, your boat-schooled students are not going to be watching their favorite TV sitcoms. That’s when you bring out pens and paper so everybody can write letters to their friends or make a daily entry into their cruising journal.

Reading. There are countless reading choices, depending on your young matey’s age. For younger children A Swim through the Sea is a charming story and beautifully illustrated. For young explorers there is Pirates and Buried Treasure, full of tales of the pirates who once sailed our local waters; or bring along the classic Treasure Island. To bring these tales to life you can stage your own “treasure hunt” when you dinghy ashore to one of the hundreds of remote islands on your route. Teens on board may want to immerse themselves in another voyage – the voyage described in Mutiny on the Bounty plus two other stories that make up the Bounty trilogy. No cruise is complete without Hemingway’s The Old Man and the Sea. What could be better than reading tales of the sea while living and cruising board a private yacht?

Art/photography. A cruise inspires our artistic side. So let those young, natural talents emerge. Make time during the day for a photo contest or for sketching. Study the cloud formations and encourage imaginations to find faces.

Arithmetic. Students can help our captain set a compass course or calculate arrival times.

Recess. Absolutely, you must schedule recess and lots of it. At this school, recess can include swimming, diving and snorkeling right from the transom of the boat.

I think we’ve got a strong start on an official summer school program for the 2004 summer semester at Southwest Florida Yachts. What do you think?
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SW Florida Yachts is Now in the Blogging Business!

2004-05-13T12:50:00.000-07:00

Hi folks. We have initiated this little corner of Cyberspace to keep you informed of the happenings here at Southwest Florida Yachts. Vic and I will be posting from time to time so that you can learn of new sailing and cruising adventures and business ventures we have planned.

Check back often and don't forget to browse over to one of our three websites:

Yacht Charters
Boating Education
Yacht Brokerage

-Barb Hansen